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Topic : Anorexia

Number of Replies: 1384
New Messages This Week: 0
Last Reply On:
Created on : Friday, July 01, 2005, 12:31:18 pm
Author : dataimport
Are you or is someone you love systematically starving themselves? Anorexia is a serious condition that needs immediate treatment. Share your story here.

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November 11, 2005, 9:50 am CST

juliana

i am sorry what was said to you in that post.  i know i didn't say it but i still want to say that.  you should not have to hear something like that and don't let it get you down!!  people don't understand that just as that person has a physical sickness that makes them not be able to eat or whatever we have a mental one.  sure we have a choice but we it is really hard but just like with cancer if you have the proper treatment then you can get better and still have a chance to gain you life back we have that same chance!! 
 
November 11, 2005, 10:00 am CST

thank you

Quote From: hisjewel

i am sorry what was said to you in that post.  i know i didn't say it but i still want to say that.  you should not have to hear something like that and don't let it get you down!!  people don't understand that just as that person has a physical sickness that makes them not be able to eat or whatever we have a mental one.  sure we have a choice but we it is really hard but just like with cancer if you have the proper treatment then you can get better and still have a chance to gain you life back we have that same chance!! 

I just wanted to say thank you for replying. It does mean a lot to me to know that there are people out there who understand and care. It is really hard for me to reach out and I am trying hard to not let those comments bring me down. It was one of those things were I just felt like saying "if you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all." Thanks again; I really do appreciate it.  

Julie 

 
November 11, 2005, 10:55 am CST

Anorexia

Quote From: juliana67

I just wanted to say thank you for replying. It does mean a lot to me to know that there are people out there who understand and care. It is really hard for me to reach out and I am trying hard to not let those comments bring me down. It was one of those things were I just felt like saying "if you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all." Thanks again; I really do appreciate it.  

Julie 

your welcome!!  I will be glad to be here for you to talk to.  It is hard to dismiss comments like that.  a lot of times all it does is make it harder.  but hey they don't know because they don't understand.  it is very hard to reach out it took me forever someone telling me try to go somewhere on the compputer where you can talk to people.   

  

hugs 

Hisjewel 

 
November 11, 2005, 2:46 pm CST

thanks again :)

Quote From: hisjewel

your welcome!!  I will be glad to be here for you to talk to.  It is hard to dismiss comments like that.  a lot of times all it does is make it harder.  but hey they don't know because they don't understand.  it is very hard to reach out it took me forever someone telling me try to go somewhere on the compputer where you can talk to people.   

  

hugs 

Hisjewel 

Hello again. I just wanted to say thank you again. Thanks for saying that you will be there for me to talk with. I understand what it's like to try and reach out to people and have it be SO hard to do. This is the first couple of times I have posted on a message board and I have been sick for a long time........so yeah, I think we all have problems reaching out sometimes. Today has been a little bit better of a day. I managed to keep down breakfast, not lunch, but breakfast is a usually a big problem for me. And I actually ate my lunch when I didn't have to! I am trying hard to have a positve mind set, but it's really hard to keep telling myself that I am not bad and worthless. Even though, when I sit down and logically think about it there is no reason for me to think either of those things about myself; it's just automatic and I cannot seem to stop it. Geesh, I tell ya, our minds are crazy sometimes! Thanks again, 

Julie 

 
November 11, 2005, 3:00 pm CST

Anorexia

Quote From: juliana67

Hello again. I just wanted to say thank you again. Thanks for saying that you will be there for me to talk with. I understand what it's like to try and reach out to people and have it be SO hard to do. This is the first couple of times I have posted on a message board and I have been sick for a long time........so yeah, I think we all have problems reaching out sometimes. Today has been a little bit better of a day. I managed to keep down breakfast, not lunch, but breakfast is a usually a big problem for me. And I actually ate my lunch when I didn't have to! I am trying hard to have a positve mind set, but it's really hard to keep telling myself that I am not bad and worthless. Even though, when I sit down and logically think about it there is no reason for me to think either of those things about myself; it's just automatic and I cannot seem to stop it. Geesh, I tell ya, our minds are crazy sometimes! Thanks again, 

Julie 

yes our minds can be crazy..........  i haven't done good today i didn't eat breakfast or lunch, well i went to the caffeteria and had two bites of salad, so really i had no lunch, although i felt horrible for eating that...... that is silly when i think about it but it does not change that is how i feel at the time.  then a little while ago i counted out 9 corn tortilla chips and ate them with some salsa.  so all i have had today is the chips and salsa and i kept thinking the whole time what am i doing eating this for.  I did think it was reallly yummy though.  well for some reason i can't seem to stay away from chocolate lately so i did have 2 mini snicker bars...... hmmmmmmm......... yes our minds are crazy!!!  although i have a problem saying it is my mind and say i am crazy...........  i have stopped drinking all the diet drinks I was having........  that helped some with how i feel.......  i started drinking green tea with citrus instead (cold not hot) at firstt i only had one a day but i have started having 2 a day............  i was drinking 8 oz of cranberry juice or grape cranberry juice but the last week or so i have had a hard time getting myself to drink.......  i do push past that although i did have a day or two that i didn't really drink anything.......  hmmmmm sigh.........  do you ever wonder what you would think or say if you could really see what you look like.......
 
November 12, 2005, 11:38 am CST

yes...anorexia

Quote From: hisjewel

yes our minds can be crazy..........  i haven't done good today i didn't eat breakfast or lunch, well i went to the caffeteria and had two bites of salad, so really i had no lunch, although i felt horrible for eating that...... that is silly when i think about it but it does not change that is how i feel at the time.  then a little while ago i counted out 9 corn tortilla chips and ate them with some salsa.  so all i have had today is the chips and salsa and i kept thinking the whole time what am i doing eating this for.  I did think it was reallly yummy though.  well for some reason i can't seem to stay away from chocolate lately so i did have 2 mini snicker bars...... hmmmmmmm......... yes our minds are crazy!!!  although i have a problem saying it is my mind and say i am crazy...........  i have stopped drinking all the diet drinks I was having........  that helped some with how i feel.......  i started drinking green tea with citrus instead (cold not hot) at firstt i only had one a day but i have started having 2 a day............  i was drinking 8 oz of cranberry juice or grape cranberry juice but the last week or so i have had a hard time getting myself to drink.......  i do push past that although i did have a day or two that i didn't really drink anything.......  hmmmmm sigh.........  do you ever wonder what you would think or say if you could really see what you look like.......

Anorexia is such an odd disease. I do wonder what it would be like if I could see what everyone else sees in me. I have such a hard time seeing any positives, even when people tell me positive things (of course, I don't believe them and block it all out!). I wish I could have seen what I really looked like at my lowest weight; instead I just saw fat.........but looking back at pictures I can see it, I just wish I could have seen it in the moment.  

So it sounds like you are not doing so hot either. I tell ya, this disease is compelling. We are slaves to it.........but there is no way to stop it (at least that I have found yet). Isn't it crazy how we KNOW that food is not bad, yet our minds will yell and scream at us that we are weak for just doing what our bodies need us to do. I hate the anorexia so much, yet I love it so much too. It's like I love it so much I don't want it to leave.......and I am freaking out when I DON"T feel like pulling my hair out (did that make sense?). I am sorry things are so difficult right now for you. How long have you been sick? Are you in any type of treatment now?  

Today hasn't been a very good day over here either. Purged breakfast. I am promising myself that I can only purge once a day, and so far, so good. I never use to purge, but this "treatment" I am in, has pretty much forced me over the edge. Anyways, I am really trying to have a positive mindset. I am trying so hard to tell myself that I am not bad and worthless and that losing 10 more pounds won't do anything for me except make me want to lose more. It is just SO HARD! ANd I really get tired of fighting. Do you ever feel just plain tired of fighting this disease?  

I hope today is going better for you.  

Julie 

 
November 12, 2005, 8:13 pm CST

Anorexia

Quote From: juliana67

Anorexia is such an odd disease. I do wonder what it would be like if I could see what everyone else sees in me. I have such a hard time seeing any positives, even when people tell me positive things (of course, I don't believe them and block it all out!). I wish I could have seen what I really looked like at my lowest weight; instead I just saw fat.........but looking back at pictures I can see it, I just wish I could have seen it in the moment.  

So it sounds like you are not doing so hot either. I tell ya, this disease is compelling. We are slaves to it.........but there is no way to stop it (at least that I have found yet). Isn't it crazy how we KNOW that food is not bad, yet our minds will yell and scream at us that we are weak for just doing what our bodies need us to do. I hate the anorexia so much, yet I love it so much too. It's like I love it so much I don't want it to leave.......and I am freaking out when I DON"T feel like pulling my hair out (did that make sense?). I am sorry things are so difficult right now for you. How long have you been sick? Are you in any type of treatment now?  

Today hasn't been a very good day over here either. Purged breakfast. I am promising myself that I can only purge once a day, and so far, so good. I never use to purge, but this "treatment" I am in, has pretty much forced me over the edge. Anyways, I am really trying to have a positive mindset. I am trying so hard to tell myself that I am not bad and worthless and that losing 10 more pounds won't do anything for me except make me want to lose more. It is just SO HARD! ANd I really get tired of fighting. Do you ever feel just plain tired of fighting this disease?  

I hope today is going better for you.  

Julie 

no i am not in treatment......  yes i have felt tired like right now i am so tired of fighting...  you made since....  i feel like going crazy when i don't do it.........  today i didn't eat anything at all.........  we even went to chili's and i had nothing.......  have have no idea how much i weiigh i just know the mirror makes me want to scream.......  well just before i was 13 is how long i remember but my dad said i actually started to refuse to eat when i was an infant and continued to.........  but when i was just about 13 is when it all started happening that i remember so i was 12 ..... now i am 24 (just turned 24).....  hmmmmmmmm  yeah anyway..................  sigh................ 
 
November 12, 2005, 8:51 pm CST

Anorexia

Quote From: juliana67

Anorexia is such an odd disease. I do wonder what it would be like if I could see what everyone else sees in me. I have such a hard time seeing any positives, even when people tell me positive things (of course, I don't believe them and block it all out!). I wish I could have seen what I really looked like at my lowest weight; instead I just saw fat.........but looking back at pictures I can see it, I just wish I could have seen it in the moment.  

So it sounds like you are not doing so hot either. I tell ya, this disease is compelling. We are slaves to it.........but there is no way to stop it (at least that I have found yet). Isn't it crazy how we KNOW that food is not bad, yet our minds will yell and scream at us that we are weak for just doing what our bodies need us to do. I hate the anorexia so much, yet I love it so much too. It's like I love it so much I don't want it to leave.......and I am freaking out when I DON"T feel like pulling my hair out (did that make sense?). I am sorry things are so difficult right now for you. How long have you been sick? Are you in any type of treatment now?  

Today hasn't been a very good day over here either. Purged breakfast. I am promising myself that I can only purge once a day, and so far, so good. I never use to purge, but this "treatment" I am in, has pretty much forced me over the edge. Anyways, I am really trying to have a positive mindset. I am trying so hard to tell myself that I am not bad and worthless and that losing 10 more pounds won't do anything for me except make me want to lose more. It is just SO HARD! ANd I really get tired of fighting. Do you ever feel just plain tired of fighting this disease?  

I hope today is going better for you.  

Julie 

i can't ever remember caffienee really affecting me but man i am about to bounce out of my skin....  i had green tea with citru\s taht has caffinee (early today)  then for supper i had 2 glasses of dt coke and a cup of coffee (wow a lot of liquids at once) then i had a mocha frapachino light from starbucks a few hoiurs ago, i know i am super anxious but i can't help but think that as much as i feellike i am going to jump out of my skin it is that cafffinee......... hmmmmmmmmm........ i can't be still to save my life........  i am moving a mile a minute LOL!!!!
 
November 13, 2005, 6:43 pm CST

oh yes

Quote From: hisjewel

i can't ever remember caffienee really affecting me but man i am about to bounce out of my skin....  i had green tea with citru\s taht has caffinee (early today)  then for supper i had 2 glasses of dt coke and a cup of coffee (wow a lot of liquids at once) then i had a mocha frapachino light from starbucks a few hoiurs ago, i know i am super anxious but i can't help but think that as much as i feellike i am going to jump out of my skin it is that cafffinee......... hmmmmmmmmm........ i can't be still to save my life........  i am moving a mile a minute LOL!!!!

I also know that feeling very well. It's weird. It's like you get ssssooo anxious and nothing you do can lessen your anxiety. I hate that feeling. I once had a medicine do that to me. Oh, it was awful not being able to control the anxiety. I'm sorry things are so hard for you right now. Being in the midst of an eating disorder is not easy; it is so exhausting.......just plain draining. I remember all to well. I hope today was better for you..........and I hope the anxiety has lessened at least a little bit! Oh it's just awful not being able to sit still!  

Julie 

  

PS. If you ever want to email me, my email is behindgreeneyes67@hotmail.com 

 
November 13, 2005, 9:53 pm CST

Anorexia

Quote From: juliana67

I also know that feeling very well. It's weird. It's like you get ssssooo anxious and nothing you do can lessen your anxiety. I hate that feeling. I once had a medicine do that to me. Oh, it was awful not being able to control the anxiety. I'm sorry things are so hard for you right now. Being in the midst of an eating disorder is not easy; it is so exhausting.......just plain draining. I remember all to well. I hope today was better for you..........and I hope the anxiety has lessened at least a little bit! Oh it's just awful not being able to sit still!  

Julie 

  

PS. If you ever want to email me, my email is behindgreeneyes67@hotmail.com 

this lady and i were talking and she was saying how thin i am and i said it's not like i am bones and she said i was like a sack of bones wrapped in skin and look far from that.............  hmmm yeah.........  nope didn't eat today.... oh wait i panicked as i ate a small bit of popcorn........  i couldn't stop moving anxiously for the longest time....... also hopeing to burn calories.............  i well yeah............ it is hard.............  do you hav e msn messenger 

 
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