Topic : Anorexia

Hello Linda. I just wanted to say hello and I am sorry you are in such a delema (sp?) right now. First of all, I am shocked at the things that were said to your friend. I don't mean to put the other board down, but wow that amazes me also that people can be so insensitive. I think you both just have to remember that those are just opinions and your opinion is the only one that matters. I know that is easier said than done. I also struggle, as I believe most of us do, with not letting other people's opinions affect us.  

I am sorry you and your friend are hurting so deeply. I know what the pain is like. Just yesterday it seemed like the pain would never leave, but today I see a little more light. I know I just have to remember that "this too shall pass." My psychiatrist told me that and I loved it. "This too shall pass." Just please hold on. I know it seems impossible to conquer sometimes, but I truly believe that one day it will not hurt so badly. It cannot always hurt this much. If it did, no one would recover (lol, my opinion).  

I am not really sure about any advice to give you on what to do about leaving the board or not. All I can say is listen to your heart and maybe weigh the pros and cons of each situation. You can always tell your friend to come to this board. We would all love to have her here :) 

Best of luck to you, and hopefully you will continue to post here. 

Julie 

No problem. I think we all have weird multiple problems, just some of us are willing to admitt to it :) 

Julie 

I am sorry I didn't get back online last night. After dinner my phone rang and I was on the phone for a while. I am sorry, and I hope you stayed "bouncy bouncy!"  

Julie 

Hey!  Sorry I haven't been on in a few days....its just been a little busy.  Well, to answer your question Julie....hmmm.  Well, my interests are:  painting, cheerleading, dance, crochet, writing, etc.  My ED history....well, its quite a long story but to sum it up a little:    I have been hospitalized for my ED 4 times (it was sooo hard!).  I started out with having EDNOS, but it turned into full-blown anorexia.  I have "moderaltely severe anorexia" and "chronic malnutrition"....whatever that means.  I do have bulimic tendencies (like when I think I ate too much, I purge).  Um, I started "dieting" 5 years ago, but wasn't diagnosed with anything until 3 years ago.  What about you all?                         ~Ashley

Wow, it sounds like we have similiar hobbies! I was a cheerleader when I was in school, I danced ballet for 6 years, I love to knit and write poetry! Lol, a little more about me........hmm.......I love exercise, lol who with an ED doesn't! My ED history is also quite long. I have been sick for 6 years, hospitlized 3 times (I went a whole 3 years without being hospitilized once, even though I probably should have been!). I have purging varient anorexia. Use to only have restricitive anorexia, but lately I have been purging everyday (bad bad bad). My goal is to not purge tomorrow........I'll be at work most of the day, so hopefully I'll be able to do it. I really do want to be better. I am just SSOOO scared! I am scared of everything. I want to be an eating disorder therapist someday. My last hospitlization was in June and I was in an Intensive Outpatient for 4 months after that, and through that whole time I was petrified of every small step that I took. I do want to be better, I am just so torn and confused. I have had anorexia since I was 13 (I'm 19 now), and it just seems like my whole life has been anorexia or OCD (started when I was 10-11). So basically I feel like a child in an adult body and I am freaking out! It's not even that I think I am fat, I just have such a problem with having any curves at all and that is what is freaking me out! Anywho, now that I have rambled long enough, I hope you weren't board reading all that. Thanks for asking, Ashley. So how are all of your days going? I hope everyone is doing well, considering what we are all battling! I'll talk to you all later. 

Julie 

You weren't boring me!  I love to hear about you.  Wow!  We do have similar hobbies!  Thats awesome.  I love to dance!!!  Yea I have purging type anorexia, too.  Thats a great goal (to try not to purge tomorrow).  I hope you met your goal!!!  You want to be an ED therapist?  That is so cool.  I wanted to be a therapist...I actually may try to become one someday.  But right now my goal is nursing.  I want to be an R.N. and major in psychology.  I think I may work on an ED unit, too.  That would be fun!!!  I could be one of the "nice nurses who lets you get away with a little more than the mean ones."  lol.  Yea, I am scared about recovery, also.  I sometimes have the thinking of "I have gotten this far, I can't stop now!  I have lost so much weight, all I have to do is loose a little bit more to see just how far I can go.  I can't give up on my goal now!"  Like, when I was forced to eat, I would cry at the thought of food.  But I realize that no one should cry at the thought of eating a banana and a slice of whole wheat bread.  I just have to get through this and start to realize that I really am sick.  It is really hard, but I want to recover.  I just have all this anxiety and stress about leaving my ED.  Enough about me now.....how have you been?  How is everyone on the board doing?                          ~Ashley

hi I m Katie sorry to interrupt your conversation but...I have been struggle with eating problems for the past while ,and i need friends to talk to with the same problem.  I couldn't help but notice the fact that we have alot of things in common too I am a cheerleader and have been for the past six years I also danced for six years before that.I love writing poetry it helps me feel better.when i read you conversation it was scary it was almost like looking into the future at myself not that thats a bad thing I m just scared that this will go on for the next six years like it did for you .I need someone to talk to please write me back?I m 14 by the way

um-mm i kinda posted something on the first page of this can u please read it and then reply?PS. do I have to post the most resent things on the first pages or the last ?

Hi Katie!  Welcome.  I'm Ashley.  I am kinda new here myself.  And yea, we usually post our most recent posts on the front.  lol.  But yea, I am 15, so I am pretty close to your age.  Sounds like you have been through a lot in your 14 years.  I'm sorry.  Have you ever seena therapist or been to any treatment for your ED?  Do your parents know?  Well, I like to write poetry, too.  I'll post one of my poems here if you all are interested.  Well, Katie, i hope you and I can get to chatting.....this is a very supportive board, too.      XXX

Hello Katie! I also want to say welcome and there is no need to be sorry for anything! I was always one of those people who just read messages and never responded or wrote anything and then when I came here I found that the people here are really supportive and friendly........so you have nothing to worry about......we are all here for you. I understand where you are coming from. I was 13 when my eating disorder developed. I just hope you are able to get some help because this disease is not something to take lightly. It will ruin your life. I dont' mean to scare you, but maybe if I had someone to talk to who had been stuggling for so long it would have detered me from developing full blown anorexia. Or it could work in the opposite direction. The last thing any of us want to do is trigger you into developing full blown AN. There was this one older girl who I remember had anorexia and she talked to me about it and that is when the idea was planted into my head. It was like "ohh, if she can do that, so can I." So that is what I am worried about with you my dear. Just please keep posting on here and telling us how things are going and everything. I love when new people come and join the conversation! Good luck and remember we are all here for you, Katie! 

Julie