Topic : Anorexia

I think it is ANAD that does referrals??

Just google eating disorder referral centers and see what pops up. There are official organizations that will help you find a good one. Let me know if I can help.

http://www2.oprah.com/tows/pastshows/200604/tows_past_20060424.jhtml 

This is something we all need to look at. We need to see how bad this self-esteem problem has risen to.

• A FOUR YEAR OLD girl who is afraid of getting fat???

• A THREE YEAR OLD girl who doesn't feel pretty unless she has makeup on???

• A BEAUTIFUL MODEL who thinks she's too ugly to go out of the house???

What has this world come to??

I would have never thought of this, but we of course need to put children first, but what we don't realize is that if we don't fix our problems, our children will inherit them.

• Look at these 3 quotes...

"As you were birthing your child through the birth canal, what is passed on are our wounds. … It's a generational curse that must be broken."

By comparing herself to her daughter and saying things like, "I'm the one who's really fat," Dr. Robin says Lynn and Nikki are "competing" to see who hates themselves the most.

You can't fix the girls and the self-esteem until you fix the mothers," Oprah says.

 "As Naomi Wolf said so beautifully, 'A mother who radiates self-love and acceptance actually vaccinates her daughter against low self-esteem."

Hi!

My name is Michelle, I'm 20 years old and I come from Denmark...

When I was 12 I started having an unhealthy concern about my weight, and when I stopped being a competition swimmer 14 years old I got afraid of gaining weight... At this time my weight was 36 kg, think that's 72 pounds..

To make a long story short I developed anorexia and came into treatment at the age of 15. From I was 15 till I was 19 I struggled with the extreme fear of gaining weight. I was not sick but I still lived in old patterns both in the way I was thinking and acting. For those tough almost 5 years I thought whether I was going to live with this fear for the rest of my life! Horrible! According to the majority of doctors those who struggle with an ED will struggle with the fear for the rest of their lives (well, don't know what Dr. Phils opinion is about that). In the month of April I got so desperate,  just didn't want to live in that condition for the rest of my life,cso I went to a meeting in Copenhagen with Benny Hinn. At the meeting Benny Hinn prayed for me and since then I haven't had any fear of gaining weight and I can see that I really need to gain weight! Fantastic!!! I have now gained 6 kg sine april and I have never been so happy in my life as I am now!

What took me through this struggle was my believe in God and that he wanted me to be totally free.. And he has been faithful!

Let this be an encouragement that you don't have to live in the hell of anorexia or the fear of gaining weight for the rest of your life! YOU CAN BE TOTALLY FREE!

If you want to talk, hear my story, get an advice or you need help, feel free to write me anytime. I would love to talk to you!

Hang on!

Michelle   

i knew yesterday just what i was saying to you and then had to go all of the sudden and now i wish i could remember what i was saying..........  it's hard i know because people can make it worse for us at times and harder yet at the same time we need them... not like we would say we need them and often not like we would admit it to ourselves but we have to find someone some time........ 

Thank you for the link, music_sdd, it was truely inspiring. Yesterday I had a conversation with my eighteen years old sister-in-law as she had one of them days I like to call a "fatty-day":

"You know those days when you feel like an old bag of sweaty, flobby dirt that just wobbles around and takes up space. When you hate what you see every time you look in the morror. You look fat. You look old. You look boring. You look gray, reddish, greasy. You hair looks flat, it's not really a haircut at all, just a shaggy bush on top of that greasball that is your head. Your boobs are sagging and so is your ass. You thies are floating all over the seat. Your arms are soft and saggy. And is that your tummy? Hmm, thought it was dough. Why even your feet are the wrong size!
You regret getting up and eating that breakfast. Couldn't you have eaten a little less, how dare you eat that much the way you look you don't deserve to eat nothing but cucumber for the rest of the year. You want to crawl back to the safety of your covers in bed and stay there for the rest of the day, because if you get up you might get a glimps of those celulites in the mirror and go rampage trying to stab them out with a kitchen knife. Yeah, stay in bed is all you want to do, cry and watch chick-flick movies and hope for a better tomorrow.
Those are what I call fatty-days, for obvious reasons. And I do think we all have them. Maybe not exactly fatty-days but similar body-issue-days.
And one could understand fat Anai for having a fatty-day. She wobbles when she walks. She gets bruises on the inside of her upper arms from jumping for to long on the trampoline because the flobb there rubbs against her side. She has proclaimed herself as "the class fatty".
And couldn't one get offended when "slim little me" have a fatty-day? We smaller girls in the class would get snapped at for having them because the bigger girls didn't think we had anything to complain about. But everybody has issues. I am no where near the ideal and still I've starved myself all spring and summer long (untill recently)! Everybody has "problem areas", wheather they be the usual things like thies and tummys, or your hands or you ears or that none-existant butt of yours.
But the truth is we're all entitled to those days where we shouldn't have left the bed. Do we hate them, yes we do, and do we have the right to complain about them, hell yes we do. Do we have the right to sob and sigh in order to hog some compliments we don't really think we deserve but still love and need to hear, hell yeah we do!
I did 100 sit-ups, 80 reversed push-ups and 30 minutes jogging today, had some nature-sweets and now I hate my thies. "Poor you, how much are you again, 110 pounds was it?" Yeah,that's correct, but so what my feelings are real!
Complain away sisters and brothers!"

In a couple of years, when my situation has gotte a little bit more stabile - that is when I feel comfortable enough to get off diet, when I have a solid income, when I've married my fiancé and when I've been to Japan, Italy, Iceland, China, Greace, Great Brittain and the USA - I would like to have a baby. And I wouldn't like that baby to feel the way that I feel now!

Thanks! Please pass the article on.

And before you do have that baby, remember the article.

As long as you take care of your problems first, I'm sure that your baby will turn out just fine, and you'll be a great mom. Good luck with that.

I don't really know what to say.

I just wanted to give or receive support, tell my story, and ask some questions.

Sorry if some of this is too much info, but I just want to spill it all out...

My anorexia really kicked in in year 2005 when I lost 25 pounds dangerously. I didn't want help AT ALL and my heart rate went down to 50, normally being 65ish. Never had any bulimia symptoms, by the way.

Long story short, my parents kicked me into an involuntary hospital. Let me put it this way.. it was a horrible experience. Of course it was too much food for me to handle, along with an Ensure or 2 yogurts with every meal. I felt like crap, I felt fat and ugly.. especially when comparing myself to everyone else. I was put on an anti-depressant, Prozac. I was tired ALL the time because of the food, to be honest, and because of the meds. I sleeped all day when there wasn't therapy, and it was so difficult to stay awake during the therapy sessions.

It was one of the most horrible things I have ever done.. just being there. I was so anxious to get out and "lose the weight" again. I also had a medicine allergic reaction to Reglan, where my neck, "involuntary movement".. it kept moving side to side.. and I couldn't control it. Not to mention I was always bloated in the hospital and couldn't digest everything and I needed Nexium for heartburn. stayed there for 2 1/2 weeks.

afterwards, I went to eating some of what I was supposed to, to eating practically nothing. I went to an OP program, kept losing weight every week. I was primarily eating a few carbs and a lot of OJ. after a horrible fight with parents, I became suicidal, and I won't spare you the details. the cops came and took me to the hospital. I went to the SAME hospital again, but in the other unit. It was absolutely HORRIBLE. I did NOT fit in.. it was a bunch of disrespectful/bad teenagers who cussed and liked to go against rules. I hated it. it was rediculous.. but I learned my lesson. I lost even more weight and dropped around 7 more pounds than I came in at.

I was transferred RIGHT to Renfrew and it was an ok experience.. it was a wonderful place, and I WISH I would have taken advantage of everything it had... to be honest with you. I gained around 8-9 pounds in 3 weeks. I came back in the middle of February.

Now, I am ok. I'm 16 years old and have had this ED for a year and a half. I'm struggling a lot, though.. more with body image than the food. I mean hell yeah, I struggle with obsessing and counting and everything.. but it's not like I'm 'starving'.

everything seems so severe. I look in the mirror and see a fat person. my BMI is around 16.8. I hate how I look. I lost around 3 pounds since Renfrew, but I don't know.

I have tons of food rituals, and hate my body and myself. I have poor self esteem, and sometimes I wish I was invisible. I can't stop counting and measuring either. I don't mean to frustrate my parents, but I feel so.. powerless.. like this anorexia has just taken over me as a whole. sometimes it takes me over 20 minutes to get dressed because I'm constantly changing what I'm wearing due to the belief that I look too big in them.

I guess I'm just looking for support.

I have questions...

how many are you in recovery?

how many of you use symptoms such as counting or measuring?

I feel so alone, yet I feel surrounded, not physically, by people on the internet who have ED's.

Thanks for reading.. if you did read. I won't be disappointed if you did not.

-Renee