Topic : Anorexia

that's great!!  and you didn't sound cocky!!  not at all!!  you should be proud!!!  yep yep!!!  I am also so glad that for the first time you want to live!!!  :0)

Hi everyone,

It's been awhile since I last posted. I am 38 years old and find myself going back to the anorexia. I am pretty sure my ED is stress related. I just have so much going on in my life right now so many changes. I hate this feeling! Anyway, I would love to talk to someone more my age. If anyone can relate please email me.

Thanks,

Emma

Hi there

I am 32,interested in a chat?

Will be back here tomorrow...............not much time now (and I only have access to a computer when I`m at work, lol, maybe a good thing!

I totally agreed with that. people just "starve" and automatically say to themselves, "Hey, I have an ED!" it doesn't automatically come like that.

I especially dislike when girls say "I wish I had the willpower to be anorexic." I get so angry because it's like, you have NO IDEA what you are talking about! eating disorders have nothing to do with food or willpower. ah.

anyway, my comment I made earlier got totally ignored. I mean I don't know, it kind of felt like I wasn't being heard and no one gave support, unlike everyone else. it was kind of long.

but I wish the best of luck to Emma and maxi and anorexics who are trying to recover.

<3

Was looking for your earlier comment & could not find it, lol, that was probbably just me!

I totally agree,why want an ED when you don`t have one? Maybe it`s just because of misconceptions, ect. People should realise how disruptive an ED can be though.......mentally, physically & emotionally..

Ok, I`ve never been on any program or anything for ED`s. The reason for this is that when it started I was only 12 and already institutionalised. Once I became a drug addict my ED was very easy to hide.....I always looked "half dead & as thin as a skelleton". Can anyone tell me more about where our ED`s actually stem from, ect.  I have always dealt with my drug addiction as my 1st problem, but now that I`m clean I realise that my ED has always been there, and that I`ve just been too "out of it " to read the signs.

Someone told me Yesterday that my selfdestructive tendacies, eg. self-mutulation stems from my bulimic side, and not from my anorexic side.....does this make sense to anyone?

Thanx for the good wishes, it means more than u think!

I decided that wanting to live HAS to be an active decision that I HAVE to make every morning as I wake up. I am VERY good at feeling sorry for myself & blaming (or making excuses for) my present behaviour and mindset on things that have happened in my past & the turns my life has took. So what I`ve been trying to do for the last few weeks is: STAY IN THE PRESENT & BE VERY AWARE. It might sound a bit patronising (Well, that is what I used to think!lol), but if you try and do it with the right attitude (mindset) it sorta works some of the time. Funny hey! Look, I still get lots of emotions ect, that I`ve got to deal with, but as I always say: "So far so good". I am trying not to dwell too much on the past. It is just my nightmare that I can not control at all, and that really sucks! And I am trying not too worry about the future.......easier said than done, lol! Yet, I find that if I try hard enough there is at least hope, for in the process I become more aware of the few good things still left in this world. (Take for instance this site. Might sound stupid, but u guys are here, and yes, I look forward to comming online. It is someting small, but it makes me smile, and everytime I smile I feel happier, and at the same time I can then try to pass on that smile to someone else!)

Ok, now I feel WAY too vulnerable!