My youngest son is 12 weeks old, and I am so frustrated. I'm still about 40 lbs overweight and cannot fit into any of my jeans, and I refuse to buy anything larger than the size 16's I have. I also have a 15-year-old son, Jerry, who lives with his dad, a 6-year-old son, Christopher, who's been diagnosed with autism and Asberger's syndrome, and a 2-year-old daughter, Bethany, who's actually normal! My second marriage, the one I'm in now, is on the verge of divorce due to stress and financial problems. We live in a little two bedroom apartment, and I sleep on the couch because my husband works 7am to 3pm and he gets up early. Bethany sleeps in our bedroom in her crib still, and Christopher has the other bedroom. I am always tired and don't have anywhere to excercise. We live on a state road on the outside of town with no sidewalks. I have an Associates Degree in business administration and I work at McDonald's for less than $6/hr because I can't find anything around here in my field. We don't have anyone to babysit for the kids so we can have any time to ourselves, unless we take them 15 miles one way to pay for a babsitter, and then they need to be picked up by 5pm. The kids' grandparents don't come around very often, and my mother-in-law hasn't even seen her 12-week-old grandson yet, though she only lives about a half-hour away. My mother has some disabilities; chronic fatigue syndrome, TMJ, and fibromyalgia, among other problems, so we don't see her very often either, though she lives 10-15 minutes away. They say, "You guys don't come around here much either." They don't seem to realize how much of a hassle it is to pack up a 6 and 2-year-old and a 3-month-old. If all 5 of us need to go somewhere, we have to take two vehicles, even with the price of gas, because we can't all fit into my 2000 Honda Civic. Three car seats just don't fit into the back. My husband, Aaron, has a 2000 Ford Ranger short cab. We cannot get a different vehicle because of our credit and income. Aaron and I are aways arguing about something and it's tearing us apart and having an adverse effect on our children. I'm just frustrated that we keep running into brick walls and going nowhere except backwards. Thank you for letting me get this off my shoulders. It helps.
