Quote From: justme0520I've had HSV2 for 18+ years. I know exactly how, when, where/who I got it. What I didn't know at the time was that I was being put at risk. He didn't tell me until 2 days later (after we first had unprotected sex) that he had HSV2. By then, I already had it. I knew something was wrong.
So I was involved with him on and off for about 5 years. I was alone for 4 years then met someone really great. We dated for about 2 years - he never had it and never got it from me. I was on Valtrex at the time. I can't say "no one" has been willing to accept this since that time. There was 1 guy - and he already had it. I am just all over the board with this thing. I've been up (ok with it, feeling positive about life), down (suicidal, sometimes Very suicidal), and everywhere in between.
Apparently, I've always had it a lot worse than most people. I *wish* I could be one of the people who only break out 1 or 2x a year. That would be wonderful! The Valtrex did it's job for a while, but then even it stopped working and I had ob's all the time.
I've been researching and using natural / homeopathic remedies for a couple years now with varying results. My problem right now is that while the HSV2 seems under control (as long as I keep taking the various pills), it has spread to my mouth - can it be called HSV1... i don't know. Frankly, I'm slightly in denial about this right now. This just happened a month ago and I am (internally) devasted. Pretty much NO ONE in my life knows about this. This is a secret I keep locked down tight. My family is a bunch of teasers. There's no way I could tell them something like this and not have it come back at the worst possible time.
On the up side (if there is one in this freaking mess), when I do have ob's they are mild and go away quickly. I went without any ob's (when i still only had HSV2) for a full year. That was wonderful! I felt invincible - but yes, I would have had the talk/been responsible if I had met anyone to date. That was up until Feb 2007. Then I started having small ob's around the time of my period each month. I got back on a maintenance/suppression protocol a couple weeks ago - after I got a cold sore :( - and have not had any HSV2 outbreaks since. But I did just have what would have been a large cold sore on my mouth - but thankfully it only looked like a rash and is pretty much gone now - 2 days after it appeared.
So, I *want* to be positive about this since my ob's seem mild and easily suppressed... I feel really down, and really infected. Frankly, I feel horrible right now.
I've tried a couple H dating sites in the past. I must attract the weirdos. I see cute/normal guys on there but they never talk to me, or ignore me if I talk to them. I've met 1 guy from one of those sites but it just didn't work out - so I try, try again every few months. How depressing.
And just for the record, I'm a 39 yo single professional with a good job and a good family. They all wonder why I don't date, or why I'm always alone. I can't confide in them. My friends tell me I'm cute/sexy and that I shouldn't be so picky. I don't tell them either. I don't have a friend close enough to tell right now - and I probably wouldn't tell them anyway. I know I have lots of reasons to be grateful and thankful, and I am. But right now, I feel horrible. I'll go check out some more blog sites to make me feel better - i.e., remind me I'm not really alone.
I understand your whole embarassment over this issue. I myself have 2 std's both of which will never go away. My outbreaks are few but still nonetheless a painful reminder of my past. I am a happily married 33 year old and have 3 children and it was the hardest thing to do to tell the one your falling in love with that this what you have are they willing to accept that. I have only been with my husband for four years so the two previous relationships I have had before that have both been very accepting. One of which contracted a std himself in which I feel awful for, he is still single and so afraid to tell anyone about this. My best advice is to make sure he is crazy about you, can't live without you and would accept anything you had to tell him. It worked out for me 3 times. Easier said than done right?? Perhaps you are not bringing the confidence that you need for people to realize what a wonderful person you are. I still live my life as I am suppose to. I don't put up with anyone's crap any longer than I have to as a matter of fact I am the one who broke up with the first two. I finally realized that I deserved to be happy and the std's did not affect my decision in this matter. I didn't have to settle and some may think they settled for me. I am a wonderful person and bring alot of laughter and love to any relationship and deserve to be treated the same. Remember as well that even though they say that food is the way to a man's heart that he is thinking with something else in the beginning:) Give him something to think about brush up on your skills, work him like a part time job...he he sorry to be so blunt. You can do all this without having to have sex in the beginning until your comfortable enough to tell him. Like putty in your hands...now you just have to meet him...I truly hope this works out for you. When I first found out I had these 2stds I was twenty and thought my life was over turns out it wasn't. Look up the facts I believe there are a huge percentage of Americans that have had or have had an std. This info will help when you meet someone and bring the subject up eventually. Good luck you deserve it as we all do...
