Topic : Dealing with Postpartum Depression

I have been struggling with ppd for the last 13 months. I was hospitalized for 2 months for my ppd and while in there, my husband had said that he wanted a separation from me. Recently we have been arguing much more frequently and i can't stand it anymore. He doesn't want to come home from work and now he is working weekends. I need a break from the kids once in awhile to and he just can't understand that. I am with them all day long. By the time he gets home from work they are both in bed. I have gone and talked to my GP and have had my meds increased, but that doesn't seem to be working. I am constantly have bad thoughts of wanting to die. and i have even made a plan and everything. I have not told my GP about this plan because i am afraid that she will send me back to "ONE FLEW OVER THE COO-COO'S NEST" I can't go back there again. I attempted suicide 2 times while in the hospital. and i don't want to go back. If anyone has any methods on how to deal with this let me no. Thank you

His behaviour, to me, seems beyond the normal exploration and curiosity typical to that age ( You show me yours, I'll show you mine, is a typical 4 year old's game). His behaviour stands out as a preoccupation, as if he is re-enacting adult behaviour he has witnessed.

Report his behaviour to CPS, and let them investigate. Meanwhile, gently correct the child in class - not with harsh words or rough treament, but with a matter of fact, " Charles, this is not a game we play in class" "Charles, we keep out hands to ourseleves" "charles, in class we wear our clothes"

No over-reactions or in-depth explanations are necessary, just a quiet statement of what the expectations for classroom behaviour are.

Let CPS investigate the family situation, and stay out of that except for asking for the investigation.

Of course you need a break. Get a sitter and set out a plan for time to yourself.

It can be time every day, a day a week, or a few days a week, whatever suits your mood and budget.

Take that time. Take a class or leave the time unstructured. Take a NAP!

If hubby is so stressed out by your unhappiness that he can't face it, or admit your needs without having to face your unhappiness, you are going to have to care for yourself. He will probably be a better husband when he is not feeling so threateneds, despairing and inadequate to deal with the changes in you. If he knew better, he'd do better, but he doesn't. So acknowlege your needs and TAKE what you need.

A happier you is an investment not only in yourself but your whole family. Take that time, get that sitter. Recharge your batteries, mothering is hard, hard work. And take your vitamins in additions to your meds. Good nutritions will help you rebound and deal with all the stress and the feeling that you are at the end of your rope.

Men do not get postpartum depression. Men may be stressed and depressed after the arrival of a new baby, but this is an adult situational reaction, Men do not get pregnant and do not given birth. Women suffer depression from physical changes related to a physical condition.

Men may be stressed and tired, but do not suffer loss of blood or hormonal disruptions affecting brain function.

Men may require treatment, but it is not the same syndrome.

How do you cope with postpartum depression? What works best for you, a walk, talking to someone, writing in a journal, seeing a counselor, or something else? Ive had to deal with a lot during my pregnancy (from hyperemesis, no family support, financial trouble and getting my condo taken away and kicked out of my mother-in-laws house) and after (my baby had a life threatening condition, chronic lung disease). I try to deal with my depression but sometimes its hard to bear especially with no one really to talk to about it. What would you recomend i try?

 

I think you should talk to someone.  If you have no one to talk to then see a counselor at Unioned Counseloring Service in your town.  Writting in a journal helps get the feelings out of you to help you understand and to help you to deal with what is borthering you.  Write how you feel and what is wrong.  Say anything because you are the only one that will read it. 

 

I will listen to you if you ever need to talk. 

I am 21 yrs. old, and I just gave birth 5mths. ago to my first baby, Gage.  I know I have ppd, but when I asked my doctor about it he said that most younger women go through it and it should go away before the 6th month. Well, it hasn't.  He told me to come back if I felt as if I would hurt my child, or if I felt I didn't want to get out of bed in the morning... Well, first, I have to get up in the morning I have a baby to take care of....my fiance works midnight shift......Now, I'm scared to ask my dr. again because he blew me off the first time.....I'm just sooooo unhappy.

  I WASN'T TOLD I HAD BIPOLOR UNTIL A FEW YEARS AGO ! I'M 36 , NOW LOOKING BACK I CAN SEE IT . I HAVE MY UPS AND DOWN AND TRY MY HARDEST TO GET THROUGH EACH DAY , AND TRYING TO TAKE CARE OF MY 4 YEAR OLD SON . WHEN I SEE OTHER SINGLE MOMS THAT HAVE 3 AND 4 KIDS I DON'T KNOW HOW THEY DO IT . I KNOW I CAN'T DO IT , MY SON IS ENOUGH .

Congratulations on the birth of your baby.

 

Next thing, as a young mum what you could be suffering is the "baby blues".  It is a little milder than the full-blown depression.  Having said that though, talk to another doctor.  Get a second opinion, and talk to a woman doctor if you can.  Tell them what you are feeling.  I found I had a good result when I said I wasn't coping as well as I thought I should, and the doctor got me a referral to a psychiatrist straight away.

 

Having a baby, as you now know, is exhausting and that just makes your feelings stronger.  But, trust in your instincts and if you feel it could be more, then do something about it.  It would be a great tragedy if you hurt yourself or your baby.  Find a doctor who's more willing to help you, and stand up for your rights as a patient.  You deserve a second opinion.

 

Take care.  Get some rest when the baby sleeps.  That does help, trust me.  I've been there.  It amazed me how a good night's sleep made me feel. 

 

Bye from Australia.

Ruthieg