Topic : General Advice

Sorry so long... Please read! 

My DH is a really good Daddy to my 2 yo son and 5 yo daughter.  HOWEVER... before we met he was into cartoony-type sexy images of females (kind of like Jessica rabbit, but actual humans).  They kind of take Betty Boop to the next level... skimpy bathing suits (they don't expose any genitalia, but they are sexually suggestive).  There are skateboards called "hookups" that he thinks are really cool.  Anyway... these boards currently sit in a closet, because I feel strongly that my young kids not be exposed to these.  He thinks that I am making too big a deal about it, and if I don't bring attention to them the kids won't think anything about them.    

Here is the problem... he told me that he wants to have "his own room" where he can display all his collectibles for himself, including these boards.  I told him that is fine, so long as the kids don't go in there.  He thinks that would make them too much of a taboo and could potentially make the kids think that sexuality is wrong.  While he acknowledges taht he doesn't think they are "appropriate" for the kids, he also doesn't think they are "inappropriate."   He thinks we as a society make too big a deal about images of the human body and the recognition of people as sexual beings.    

I don't know what to do.  It seems crazy that I would subject my kids to a lifetime of split parenting (divorce), because of these images, but I feel like I'm going against my own desires by "allowing" them.  This is becoming a situation where DH feels as though he is being controlled by me and that he wants to be able to just be himself in this one room.  

What do you think.  Here is a link, so you have an idea of what I'm talking about.  

http://www.skatesonhaight.com/ProductDetails.asp?ProductCode=HDDP  

Please let me know what you think.  

Thanks!  

My son will be 9 in October.  He wets the bed everynight.  Occassionally when he sleeps over at friends houses, he does not wet the bed. 

I have tried stopping drinks after 6pm.  Getting him to go pee before he goes to bed.  I have also woke him up to go pee when I go to bed (around 11pm) He has either allready peed or still wakes up wet.  I have even gone as far as the medication prescribed by doctors.  That didn't work either. 

Every night he wears pullups to bed.  (I have to buy the Good nights as the sizing is bigger, and they are more expensive) This morning he went right through his pull up and we are washing his sheets. 

I am so tired of washing clothes and smelling pee in his room.  I do not scold him for this, but I have started making him do his own wash and making up his bed when it is all clean.

My 5 yr old thinks that he needs to wear pull ups as well.  I tell him he doesn't need to but he says his brother does so he wants to. ANd occassionally he will wet the bed as well. 

I occasionally wet the bed when I was young, (as an older child, amybe up til I was 11) But not every night.  This is driving me crazy!  Sometimes we don't have any pull ups, as I refuse to by them at $20 a bag, (you know 2 days before pay day). I will not buy one of those electrice shockers, that shocks them when they pee in thier sleep........

Basically I don't think any one can help us, he will just have to grow out of it, but I needed to vent....Thanks for listening!

Sorry so long... Please read! 

My DH is a really good Daddy to my 2 yo son and 5 yo daughter.  HOWEVER... before we met he was into cartoony-type sexy images of females (kind of like Jessica rabbit, but actual humans).  They kind of take Betty Boop to the next level... skimpy bathing suits (they don't expose any genitalia, but they are sexually suggestive).  There are skateboards called "hookups" that he thinks are really cool.  Anyway... these boards currently sit in a closet, because I feel strongly that my young kids not be exposed to these.  He thinks that I am making too big a deal about it, and if I don't bring attention to them the kids won't think anything about them.    

Here is the problem... he told me that he wants to have "his own room" where he can display all his collectibles for himself, including these boards.  I told him that is fine, so long as the kids don't go in there.  He thinks that would make them too much of a taboo and could potentially make the kids think that sexuality is wrong.  While he acknowledges taht he doesn't think they are "appropriate" for the kids, he also doesn't think they are "inappropriate."   He thinks we as a society make too big a deal about images of the human body and the recognition of people as sexual beings.    

I don't know what to do.  It seems crazy that I would subject my kids to a lifetime of split parenting (divorce), because of these images, but I feel like I'm going against my own desires by "allowing" them.  This is becoming a situation where DH feels as though he is being controlled by me and that he wants to be able to just be himself in this one room.  

What do you think.  Here is a link, so you have an idea of what I'm talking about.  

http://www.skatesonhaight.com/ProductDetails.asp?ProductCode=HDDP  

Please let me know what you think.  

Thanks!  

I have Witnessed a 40 year old parent of two children tonight call her 13yr old a p*ssy.  Now she told me that she was only joking around and that her child knew that too.  I found it very offensive for the childs sake.  Could Dr. Phil or anyone here give a clue to if this would be ok or not even ok if it was joking around and her child knew she was kidding?  I did ask her if she would call her mother that and she said yes.  So I told her to call her up now and call her that word to her ear, but she couldn't do that.  Gee, what's the problem with that????? 

This mother of two is so out of control that her 13yr old is dang near failing school for the first marking period and has pretty much failed the last half of last years school year.  Her two year old just runs around like some wild animal that knows how to manipulate everyone and everybody and no boundaries set anywhere.  She has already said about four curse words at the age of 2yrs but to them since it's not everyday it's no big deal.  God she sends her kid to bed a 8pm, but doesn't want to until 8:30pm.  Her excuses are that "I don't get to see my child."  She refers to her 2yr old as her baby and not in the sense of her child being young, but more like the most precious thing in the world on her intention while her other child is left out of the caring parenting word.  Something is not right here with this single parent that refuses help because she can't admit failure and except anyone's help.  I'm nervous for these children not growing up with the tools they need to have to live in the future.  She can't even get her child to come to her when she calls.  Does that sound like a problem?  Because the problem is that her child is watching TV and she won't turn that off to actually spend time with her kids.  Man is this house out-of-control real bad.  Kind of like living in the wilderness with wild animals.  No one wants to be around those animals if they aren't tamed.  Do they?  Well just think how these kids are going to be in five years when no one tries to do the best thing for these children right now?
 

My daughter has just turned 18, and has had the same boyfriend for about 3 years.  My problem is that he treats her like a doormat and she lets him.  I didn't raise her to be this way, and to my knowledge there isn't anyone in my family that way, we all are very strong women!  I just don't know how to handle this. 

I know if I say she can't see him anymore, it could make it worse...she could just run off and marry him, she can run off with him and there isn't anything that I could do about it!  She is a great girl, and has alot of dreams, but I am afraid that he will try and hold her back from those dreams! 

She will wait around for him to call her, she will always go to any family function that his family is having, but he will never come to any of her families functions.  She is a cheerleader and it has been a big part of her life the hole time they have been together, I think he has been to about 3 ballgames over the past three years.  He tries to tell her how to dress, before she was with him she would wear shorts all summer, now the only time she will wear shorts is in the house at home, she says it is because she doesn't fill comfortable, but in my heart of hearts I know he has told her he doesn't want her wearing them.  These are just a few examples, but I just don't know what to do! 

I am so afraid she will give up on all her dreams because he has already said he doesn't want her to go to college, I don't think he has ever hit her I don't have any reason to say that but I do think he is verbally and mentally abusive to her to a certain extent.  She has to call him before she goes anywhere and as soon as she gets home she calls him!  Dr. Phil or someone here I need HELP!  I don't know what to do!  And I can't stand the thought of looseing my daughter to a man (boy) that is going to treat her this way! 

PLEASE HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!