Topic : Overcoming Grief

Hi, 

Im a 20 year old girl from Melbourne, Australia and live at home with my 15 year old brother. Our mother passed away in May last year from Motor Neurone Disease and then in March this year, our father passed away after suffering several strokes. Its been really hard for us since then, especially when mothers day and fathers day came. I think about them all the time and wish that they were still here. There are times when i wish that it was me that had died rather than them, because i dont know the first thing about raising a teenager. It doesnt help either being single and not being able to work because im 29 weeks pregnant.  

I worry about my brother quite a lot. I had some grief counselling, whereas my brother hasnt. He wont talk to anybody about his feelings and im scared that one day he's going to crack. I know the feeling of keeping things bottled up inside for so long, because it happened to me and i became an alcoholic with suicidal thoughts. I dont want him to do the same. How can i get my brother to talk to someone about his feelings? 

I lost my mom 2 1/2 years ago and she was my best friend.  I used to think I was a strong person but now I feel like I am so vulnerable.  I am 39 years old and my 40th b-day is coming..I havent been able to get happy and frankly all the women in my life have either passed on or not very simpithetic.  I feel very alone and scared at this point.  My best friend and I just had a fallen out also.  Is there someone out there who can realate to this and help with this terrible feeling of depression and sadness? I am married to a wonderful man and I have 2 children and I would like to be the mom and wife I want to be however the thoughts of greif and loneliness sometimes gets in the way.  My advice to any women if your mom is your best friend make sure you have other women supporters in you life because I have lots of friends but I told my mom everything.  Now I feel I have no one who understands and can help. 

thanks Teresa  

Hi Teresa,   

My name is Kim.  I lost my mom 2 months ago.  I know how you feel and I know how long days can seem. I have an husband and 2 beautiful little girls and i still feel lost alone and angry.  I havent been the best wife and mom since I lost my mom.  Im always sad and depressed. Coming from a person who suffering from the lost of their mother I say Pray Pray Pray and ask the lord for strength.  My mom was my bestfriend also, so I know that make things hurt twice as much when you dont have no one to turn to.  So maybe we can be a support system for eachother. If you ever need someone to talk to and that is someone who can relate with your situation feel free to contact me.( www.kedwards@hotmail.com)   kimmie1 

I lost my mom 2 1/2 years ago and she was my best friend.  I used to think I was a strong person but now I feel like I am so vulnerable.  I am 39 years old and my 40th b-day is coming..I havent been able to get happy and frankly all the women in my life have either passed on or not very simpithetic.  I feel very alone and scared at this point.  My best friend and I just had a fallen out also.  Is there someone out there who can realate to this and help with this terrible feeling of depression and sadness? I am married to a wonderful man and I have 2 children and I would like to be the mom and wife I want to be however the thoughts of greif and loneliness sometimes gets in the way.  My advice to any women if your mom is your best friend make sure you have other women supporters in you life because I have lots of friends but I told my mom everything.  Now I feel I have no one who understands and can help. 

thanks Teresa  

I feel your pain to the bone. My dad passed away in 1992 from a blood disease (polysythemiavera). He'd had the disease for years, but I never thought he'd die from it. We were very close, I barely knew my mother I was so close to my dad. I was 24 when it happend and my son was 3 months old, his last words were, I don't want to die, I want to watch my grandchildren grow up. I've never gotten over it, i've lost my grandmother and grandfather since, and 2 uncles and a cousin. But, nothing hit me like his death. I blocked out so many things in my life after that happened, it's really sad. Try to live in the moment and don't lose touch with what's going on in your life. If I wouldn't have had my son at the time I wouldn't have cared about going on. My husband was devistated as well, so it was hard for us to support each other. I cry a lot still, but I focus on good things, Im still having a difficult time getting close to my mom. If you have that relationship treasure it. I'm so sorry about your dad. My uncle is in the hospital right now with lung cancer, and the dr. had predicted he may not live much longer. I can't seem to stop crying about that, I guess it brings up a lot of the past when my dad was going through this. Good luck to you and your family. May GOD bless you and help you get through these tough times. I find it helps you to help someone else who is burdened with death to be there for them to talk to. Thanks for sharing your story. 

Hi Teresa,   

My name is Kim.  I lost my mom 2 months ago.  I know how you feel and I know how long days can seem. I have an husband and 2 beautiful little girls and i still feel lost alone and angry.  I havent been the best wife and mom since I lost my mom.  Im always sad and depressed. Coming from a person who suffering from the lost of their mother I say Pray Pray Pray and ask the lord for strength.  My mom was my bestfriend also, so I know that make things hurt twice as much when you dont have no one to turn to.  So maybe we can be a support system for eachother. If you ever need someone to talk to and that is someone who can relate with your situation feel free to contact me.( www.kedwards@hotmail.com)   kimmie1 

There is so much to say about my very best friend Eric that I don't know where to begin. Eric, who died on 8/27/05, was a truly remarkable person. He touched many lives, but mine exceptionally so. I had been BLESSED with KNOWING HIM. I was FLATTERED when he started TALKING ABOUT taking our friendship to the next level, which was about 3 months before he died. I love ERIC as a friend and as a brother and I KNOW that Eric TRULY LOVED ME SO MUCH!! I cry every day. I drink to kill the pain. It just hurts so much to know that I can't share things with him like I used to. We shared the laughter and the tears! Things will never be the same NOW.  

monikam