Topic : 01/01 Revenge of the Exes

 Everytime I see a show with women on I cringe because they don't stop and think that maybe, just maybe they bring things on themselves. Sometime they don't think things through. infact most of the time. This women who has the Web sight. Shame on her for even thinking up something like this and then putting it out there for the World to see. The fact that she has given

ignorant women the sight to post their ignorance on is inappropriate. Women forget that they are 50% responsible for what happens to them. Hey ladies talk to yourself about your mistakes before you try to ruin someone else because your heart is aching a little bit, Welcome to the real world.

While Tasha may be legally within her right to establish this website, I find it morally reprehensible. She is encouraging her "sisters" to act upon their lowest behaviors rather than helping them rise above difficult even traumatizing situations in their lives. Trashing and taking revenge on the men who have done wrong to us does nothing but strip us of our integrity. At each step in a relationship we have choices to make. If he does things that are unacceptable to you, get out. Get out with your dignity, self respect and integrity in tact.

During my divorce, which was precipitated by my husbands affair among other things, I was driving home one day to a much anticipated meeting with my husband to discuss custody and the separation agreement we were trying to hash out.  The radio was on and James Taylors song “You’ve got a Friend” was playing.  I’d listened to this song hundreds of times over the years, but I heard it differently given the content and context of my life at that moment. The lyrics went, “People can be so cold.  They’ll hurt you, and desert you. They’ll take your soul if you let them. Oh, yeah, but don’t you let them”.  It inspired me to not lose myself, my integrity, my basic goodness despite all of the nasty things he had done.  I would not let him steal my soul.  

I would not let his actions turn me into a bitter, angry, vengeful, mistrustful person.  Those adjectives were never me, and I knew that unless I made a constant, vigilent effort to reign in my anger, my depression, my mistrust, my hate and so on, that the events of my life, or content, could destroy my basic sense of self.  It would be easy to blame him, hate him, look for every reason to justify my anger and hatred, but it would destroy me.

Whatever pain you have experienced, whatever righteous anger you may carry, it is up to you to determine if the experiences will ultimately steal your soul and allow you to behave in ways that are not within your integrity.

The woman who runs this website may be right within the law, but she has given up her integrity and is looking to take her sisters down with her.

First, I am NOT defending any of the male scoundrals out there who have obviously hurt the women in their relationships.  But I do think that both women  AND men should 1) be a little less gullable until the trust ie earned (2) also take some ownership in their relationship choices.   I'm reminded of my brother, who in college would tell me about a girl who had been dating who "ended up being psycho".  I pointed out to him that she was ALWAYS a little nutty..he just chose not to see it because she was cute.  If he had different priorities (which he did get over time) for his mate....he could have skipped the "psycho" ex.

I do think that it can be beneficial to vent to other's who've gone through similar experiences when you've been hurt..up to a point.  It takes a LOT of energy to be so angry and that in turns makes it harder for you to heal and move on to be happy in your own life

However, I do not LIKE nor do I think it's fair that the women posting on Tasha's website are able to remain anonymous, and still post pictures and names of the men they are targeting.   Regardless of whether or not the stories are true or not..unless laws are passed for any of these men's offenses,  than I think it is unfair to jeapardize someone's reputation, family and livlihood.  And if it were a crime, these men would have the right to face their accusers.

I think the web host of  Don'tDateHim,Girl.com is in legal hot water.

I understand the value of what she's doing.  I think people should be able to post to a web site like hers and she should be allowed to keep it BUT I think she is wrong when she says she is not responsible for the content of other people's posts.

When she allows people to post anonymously, she assumes responsibility for what they say. The only legal way for her to stay out of hot water is to make the women who post to her site be required to identify themselves with name and photograph, the same way they are identifying the men they trash.

It is also the moral thing to do and the best way to encourage women to be honest. If the purpose of the site truly is to warn other females away from being taken in by a dishonest man, shouldn't the web host be eager to support truth on her site? 

I think probably most of the women who post on the site are telling the truth. But in our country, one has a right to confront their accusers.

Todd should be suing the persons that posted the slanderous quotes about him, not Tasha.  Sure she should have the posters make themselves known.  But Todd knows who slandered his name.  He knows whom he's hurt enough to get revenge on.  People need to take into account others feelings when dealing in relationships.   It will be interesting to see who wins this case.