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Topic : 01/01 Revenge of the Exes

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Created on : Friday, September 15, 2006, 12:01:50 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 09/20/06) Have you ever wanted revenge on an ex-lover? How far would you go? First, look inside a legal battle that has been brewing all summer. Tasha, creator of the Web site DontDateHimGirl.com, says her site is a public forum for women to share their dating experiences and tell the "truth" about their exes. Todd says false information about him was posted on Tasha's site, and he thinks she should be liable for the negative posts. He has filed a lawsuit against her and two of the women who posted. When they face off for the first time, who does Dr. Phil think is right? Then, Ashley found out her boyfriend, Corey, had cheated on her three times during their 10-month relationship. Now, she says she wants to get revenge by exposing him to the world. So why did she recently call Corey and beg for sex? And, Corey comes clean with Ashley and tells her how he really feels. Talk about the show here.

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January 11, 2007, 2:00 pm CST

A lil comment to TODD

I was just watching this and dont really have an opinion about who is right or wrong....BUT I found a comment Todd said interesting...

 

"this is my life you are messing with, you cant go online and post something and ruin someones life like that; maybe before you do something like that when you are emotional you should think about the life you are taking away"

 

Well...men cannot be tested for HPV (most strains of herpes) which 1 in 4 women have and can be tested for and DO have. This strain of HPV causes cervical cancer, and is the leading cause of female death in the world. So, Todd, maybe before you have unprotected sex with anyone, you should think about who's life you are taking away.

 

 

 
January 11, 2007, 2:31 pm CST

HPV

Quote From: lilmegs

I was just watching this and dont really have an opinion about who is right or wrong....BUT I found a comment Todd said interesting...

 

"this is my life you are messing with, you cant go online and post something and ruin someones life like that; maybe before you do something like that when you are emotional you should think about the life you are taking away"

 

Well...men cannot be tested for HPV (most strains of herpes) which 1 in 4 women have and can be tested for and DO have. This strain of HPV causes cervical cancer, and is the leading cause of female death in the world. So, Todd, maybe before you have unprotected sex with anyone, you should think about who's life you are taking away.

 

 

HPV is Human Papilloma Virus, not Herpes.  The new vaccine out only protects against some strains, but it doesn't mean you can't get it if you're vaccinated.
 
January 12, 2007, 1:53 am CST

RIGHT TO CONFRONT YOUR ACCUSER

I THINK THAT IF PEOPLE CAN JUST THROUGH OUT THAT KIND OF STUFF, WE ARE IN TROUBLE. IN MY OPINION , WHAT THEY ARE SAYING COULD BE CONSIDERED SLANDER. IT'S SAD THAT TASHA DOESN'T WANT TO EDIT OUT THAT KIND OF COMMENT. I THINK SHE'S KIND OF MAD ABOUT MEN IN GENERAL.
 
January 13, 2007, 1:23 am CST

01/01 Revenge of the Exes

Quote From: writer2007

I am all for a site like Don't Date Him Girl.  If the men didn't mistreat women, cheat on women, lie to women, etc., then they would have nothing to worry about.  Sometimes you just need a place to vent.  For me, I took it out on my blog.  Before blogging, I had some very evil thoughts in mind to exact revenge one time years ago, some of those thoughts were even illegal, but I was going to wait a year before doing them just so the person wouldn't know it was me.  I am glad I decided to wait.  Because after a year, I had gotten over him completely and went on my merry way.  Having a good outlet to vent and release your anger is not necessarily revengeful.  It can be very therapeutic.  You can find support by talking to others as well.  To simply say living well is the best revenge is a bunch of crap.  Most of the men who mistreat women have gone on with their lives as well, and probably don't even know how well you're living.

and illegal possible thoughts were a place for vengence online??? please help help yourself. that's a forum for professionalism not BLOG!!! we all suffer, and i believe that writing is like journalizing. but the hatred & volatile thoughts should be in your JOURNAL! or with a therapist or in confidence with a friend or family member. take it from me, i've voiced my hositle opinion in the past and it's truly hindered me. be smart before you exert those negative feelings. trust me, we all have them.
 
January 13, 2007, 7:10 am CST

I don't agree

Quote From: writer2007

I am all for a site like Don't Date Him Girl.  If the men didn't mistreat women, cheat on women, lie to women, etc., then they would have nothing to worry about.  Sometimes you just need a place to vent.  For me, I took it out on my blog.  Before blogging, I had some very evil thoughts in mind to exact revenge one time years ago, some of those thoughts were even illegal, but I was going to wait a year before doing them just so the person wouldn't know it was me.  I am glad I decided to wait.  Because after a year, I had gotten over him completely and went on my merry way.  Having a good outlet to vent and release your anger is not necessarily revengeful.  It can be very therapeutic.  You can find support by talking to others as well.  To simply say living well is the best revenge is a bunch of crap.  Most of the men who mistreat women have gone on with their lives as well, and probably don't even know how well you're living.

I am all for a site like Don't Date Him Girl.

Why? It's serves no purpose.

 

If the men didn't mistreat women, cheat on women, lie to women, etc., then they would have nothing to worry about. 

Women lie. When a man leaves a relationship simply because he no longer loves her, or because he is constantly being accused of stuff he hasn't even thought of doing, or he is tired of being punished by the woman for stuff that other guys have done, alot of women (not all women) lie about the men after the relationship is over.

 

Sometimes you just need a place to vent.

Agreed. Venting leads to healing, but only if it's done in the right way. A drug addict wouldn't turn to another drug addict who is still at the same stage as he is. A drug addict should, logically, turn to someone who has been where he is with addiction, but in the past. A drug addict should turn to someone who has been there and moved on, so that they can guide them and give them teh benefit of their experience. dontdatehimgirl.com is a haven for people who are all at the same stage of the game. It isn't for people that have been hurt and recovered to help others; it's a haven for people who are bitter and angry to perpetuate and continue to be angry and hurt.

 

Having a good outlet to vent and release your anger is not necessarily revengeful.  It can be very therapeutic.  You can find support by talking to others as well.

Agreed, but that's what friends and support groups are for. Ideally, you need someone who has been where you are emotionally, and has moved on.

 

To simply say living well is the best revenge is a bunch of crap. 

No, it isn't. When you love someone, you are showing that you care about them. When you hate someone, you are still showing someone that you care. When move on and start living well, and having a happy, productive life without the person, you are saying "Ha. I don't care about. I no longer think about you. I became dedicated to better people, and I worked hard to make something of myself, and a scumbag like you is no longer good enough to occupy an ounce of my thinking." What could be greater revenge than simply not caring?

 

Most of the men who mistreat women have gone on with their lives as well, and probably don't even know how well you're living.

Women do it, too. And, I mean this not in a rude way, but think about it logically-- why would he care? He's a degenerate sleazebag who treats women like crap, so why would he care? It's unfortuante, but there are just some people who are out for themselves and they don't care. That's SOME people, even MANY people. But not all.

 

 
January 14, 2007, 9:41 am CST

01/01 Revenge of the Exes

Happy Mom it sounds to me like you have really been thru alot of heartache and I applaud your response to the revenging ex!! I think that is a very real and somewhat hard position to take.  I have a best friend who is going thru the same thing, well, her husband hasn't physically cheated but I think for a while he as been unhappy and has been talking to at least a couple of other women on the phone.  They are now going thru a divorce and they have a 16yr old daughter, and a 12yr old son.  Talk about their world being rocked!! I would love to chat with you sometime and get some advice (if your willing) on how to let my friend know that it's time to MOVE ON!!  It's hard for me because I love and adore both of them and I am still very close to her soon to be ex-husband, drop me a line if your interested some time at gmanuia@hotmail.com.  Thanks again for your great insight!!!
 
January 15, 2007, 3:04 pm CST

You're kidding me??

Quote From: lilmegs

I was just watching this and dont really have an opinion about who is right or wrong....BUT I found a comment Todd said interesting...

 

"this is my life you are messing with, you cant go online and post something and ruin someones life like that; maybe before you do something like that when you are emotional you should think about the life you are taking away"

 

Well...men cannot be tested for HPV (most strains of herpes) which 1 in 4 women have and can be tested for and DO have. This strain of HPV causes cervical cancer, and is the leading cause of female death in the world. So, Todd, maybe before you have unprotected sex with anyone, you should think about who's life you are taking away.

 

 

So, you are going to bash Todd for making that comment and assume that what the woman/women wrote about him online was accurate and that he does or did have Herpes?  Geez, isn't that just a bit presumptious of you?   What ever happened to "innocent until proven guilty"?  An accusation, especially from an anonymous accuser is hardly a fact.  Give the guy the benefit of the doubt...or should we all assume everything we read online, in any form of media or, for that matter, any and all gossip and rumors are true?!?!   Let's hope not! 
 
January 15, 2007, 3:14 pm CST

Caught being a jerk?

Quote From: charlette4

Dr Phil,

I am really confused after watching the first segmant of this show. Yes I tivo'd it so I didn't watch it right away, life is too busy. However, I had thought many years ago that there should be some forum to women to write when wronged. Especially in cases of abusive relationships, these men who aren't hardly held accountable by our courts go on to repeat their offenses to other women affecting who knows how many children.

 

What really got to me in this first segment is that you seemed only interested in the lawsuit that the two had going on. Why was this man so upset. Could it be because he was actually caught being a jerk?? Furthermore I saw in watching this segment that he had to be so rude and interrupting the lady who owned the web site.

 

Dr Phil, I love that you have a "degree of class" on your show. However, I really felt that you let this guy walk all over the web site owner. I thought his behavior on the show proved what a rude and arrogant jerk he really was.

 

Finally, if this guy is so concerned that "everyone is reading his profile" this is a GIANT RED FLAG that Mr Hollis is a control freak if not an abuser. I know and have lived with the type.

Now wait a second here...I think you are being VERY narrow-minded here!  First of all, how can anyone blame Todd for being upset to have his name dragged through the mud?  Who would like that?   No one, of course!  And do not assume that he is guilty of these allegations just because he is defending himself.  He may have been a bit pushy and talked over the woman but, personally, I don't blame him!  This was the 1st time they met and he obviously, and I believe, rightfully, if very upset with her and her web site!  Would you expect him to be ultra-polite and respectful to her?  In an ideal world, perhaps but a world where we can get online and post anonymous slams against someone without proof and a world in which so many people feel a need to do so is HARDLY ideal! 

 

Go Todd...I hope you win the lawsuit!

 
January 16, 2007, 10:24 am CST

What if

What if there was a site for men to talk about the bad relationships they have had with women? Or what if there was a site for BOTH sexes to voice their feelings/opinions? hmmm **starts thinking**
 
January 16, 2007, 12:48 pm CST

Good idea

Quote From: timmbbo

What if there was a site for men to talk about the bad relationships they have had with women? Or what if there was a site for BOTH sexes to voice their feelings/opinions? hmmm **starts thinking**
I think that's a good idea...and this is from a woman.  I think that's a fair and logical thing to do...just don't get sued for your opinions! 
 
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