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Topic : 01/01 Revenge of the Exes

Number of Replies: 3696
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Created on : Friday, September 15, 2006, 12:01:50 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 09/20/06) Have you ever wanted revenge on an ex-lover? How far would you go? First, look inside a legal battle that has been brewing all summer. Tasha, creator of the Web site DontDateHimGirl.com, says her site is a public forum for women to share their dating experiences and tell the "truth" about their exes. Todd says false information about him was posted on Tasha's site, and he thinks she should be liable for the negative posts. He has filed a lawsuit against her and two of the women who posted. When they face off for the first time, who does Dr. Phil think is right? Then, Ashley found out her boyfriend, Corey, had cheated on her three times during their 10-month relationship. Now, she says she wants to get revenge by exposing him to the world. So why did she recently call Corey and beg for sex? And, Corey comes clean with Ashley and tells her how he really feels. Talk about the show here.

Find out what happened on the show.

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September 18, 2006, 11:47 am CDT

Revenge of the exes

Revenge...Why bother?  I mean let's be honest here..I keep reading people say they went out with every jerk blah blah..Give me a break is everyone that much in denial?  How is it that these people are able to treat you like jerks unless you let them.  More so, why did you stick around for the treatment.  I think if you keep going out with Jerks, it;s because you like them.  Or you like the treatment. Insecurities will keep you with jerks too.  If your man/women is fooling around with others...you know it.  More so even, why the heck did you stick around? Even if you are married, why would you want to be with them...FEAR is why.  I think we need to look at ourselves more and try to figure out exactly why WE keep going out with the jerks.  Most times, you will find it is because you don't really believe that you deserve better, or you are so insecure that the kind of treatment you receive is what you are use to....Revenge...that's juts stupid and immature.  Emotional maturity is something learned and something we should all strive for.  Revenge, makes you only look bad, feel bad and solves nothing.  If you feel so much that you need revenge, it is usually because you feel stupid, embarrassed and mislead....once again....that was your choice and your choice to live in fantasy not reality...the signs are always there.  It is very dangerous to live in a fantasy world, you will always only see what you want to see.  Revenge.....one of the worst things for your soul....by the way Cyber bullying has pushed teens to suicide, dropping out of school and even to hurt others.  To have a website that allows slander against people is horrible and for me being only 32 I think it is a tragedy for our society to accept this.  This web site is something that could potentially damage someone.  It is also saying that people can not and or will not ever change....Sad....
 
September 18, 2006, 11:55 am CDT

Revenge on a web site-WRONG

What you are saying then is that people never change...here is something to think about...maybe all these guys just never met the Right women for them....let's not kid ourselves...as Dr. Phil always says...we teach people how to treat us...hmmmmm ask yourself, maybe you allow guys to treat you like crap.  Don;t settle, son;t be so willing to trust....another question...how long do you date someone before you fall for them?  Odds are within the first 3 months...rose colored glasses last for 3 months, then eh next three months they slowly come off and that is where you choose....do I only see what I want to see or do I look for the truths

 

The website is wrong....not morally OK and it is very sad that people think slandering someone will make them feel good....I'd hate to be some of your friends and make a mistake...What you are saying is just that...people can not make mistakes.....Keep in mind, just because they treated you like crap doesn't mean that they are treating the next on like that too...maybe the next one is the one he loves...sorry that's reality

 
September 19, 2006, 6:09 am CDT

New Name For Website

Maybe this site should be called "Cannottletitgo.com". Or maybe "Getalife.com". I think we all have been hurt sometime in our life over relationships and marriages that did not work out. If someone leaves you for someone else, the best revenge is let them have each other. And if someone just wants to move on without you, the best revenge is move on and live your life right. To seek revenge towards someone for anything only helps their case. It makes you look like someone who deserved to get dumped in the first place.  This site is for losers and if anyone engages to use it to "hate" others, then they get what they bring on themselves. To take the "high road" and deal with the pain of your emotions without hurting others is a display of strength. To lash out and act like a child displays only weakness.
 
September 19, 2006, 6:27 am CDT

Insecurity

Quote From: noellskie

OMG are you kidding me! Regardless of whatever this guy has or has not done, what these women are doing is no different that what youth are doing online - only we call it CYBER BULLYING! This is the excatly one of the points I make in my thesis which is on the topic of cyber bullying. If a youth says something negative, hurtful or hateful against a peer it is labled as bullying, but yet were does this behaviour become acceptable ? Is it just because they are adults that they seem to think it is ok? I know Dr. Phil will set them straight on this. If we want our young people to treat others with respect online than we as adults need to set that example and not engage in and model the same behaviour we are telling them is not ok!

 

Dr. Phil I know you have my back on this don't you!

Bullys and people who find something wrong with others tend to be insecure people. They have feelings of inadiquacy and feel they have to make up for it by making others fear them. But revenge is simply about pure "hate". I don't wish bad things on my ex's because it only hurts my own spirit. I don't  know where they are today and don't care. But I do wish them best and moved on. I have no children with them and no ties so I made out pretty good. And now I have found love again and am happily married. But this would have never happened had I let a bad spirit control my thinking. This would have caused me to carry myself a different way around others probably keeping from finding the love I had found. It is all tied together.    Good post by the way..
 
September 19, 2006, 6:53 am CDT

09/20 Revenge of the Exes

Quote From: kattdream

Revenge...Why bother?  I mean let's be honest here..I keep reading people say they went out with every jerk blah blah..Give me a break is everyone that much in denial?  How is it that these people are able to treat you like jerks unless you let them.  More so, why did you stick around for the treatment.  I think if you keep going out with Jerks, it;s because you like them.  Or you like the treatment. Insecurities will keep you with jerks too.  If your man/women is fooling around with others...you know it.  More so even, why the heck did you stick around? Even if you are married, why would you want to be with them...FEAR is why.  I think we need to look at ourselves more and try to figure out exactly why WE keep going out with the jerks.  Most times, you will find it is because you don't really believe that you deserve better, or you are so insecure that the kind of treatment you receive is what you are use to....Revenge...that's juts stupid and immature.  Emotional maturity is something learned and something we should all strive for.  Revenge, makes you only look bad, feel bad and solves nothing.  If you feel so much that you need revenge, it is usually because you feel stupid, embarrassed and mislead....once again....that was your choice and your choice to live in fantasy not reality...the signs are always there.  It is very dangerous to live in a fantasy world, you will always only see what you want to see.  Revenge.....one of the worst things for your soul....by the way Cyber bullying has pushed teens to suicide, dropping out of school and even to hurt others.  To have a website that allows slander against people is horrible and for me being only 32 I think it is a tragedy for our society to accept this.  This web site is something that could potentially damage someone.  It is also saying that people can not and or will not ever change....Sad....

Wow!!   What an intersting post- No really!

 

I for one am  NOT in denial-   I know what I am worth and what I deserve-

 

Dr Phil has also said many many times that 'PAST BEHAVIOR PREDICTS FUTURE BEHAVIOR"

and  the real reality is that  most people like that do NOT change-  That is the reality-and that is sad-  

 

You sound upset-and you are entitled to what you say- but I want to share the truth -the majority of the truth -with you and those others who may read this-

 

I personally think this is a GREAT website to have and I am glad it is here-and so are many others-

 

No one is slandering any one-They are just sharing their horrible experiences of what thy went thru-to heal and to help others  as well-  I mean I  learned ALOT and took notes as well-

 

I thankfully do not live in a fantasty word-  Nothing gets by me-  I am very careful and very smart and very much living in reality-

 

Sounds like you are just a bit angry at something-  I mean you really sounded off here-

 

This is not a confrontation towards you at all- 

 

You did say alot of harsh things and alot is not even true-Keep listening to Dr Phil and be positive and be real-

 

Like the good Dr said yesterday-I love this- Get real or get gone- 

 

Wish you well-

 

NY

 

PS-  A guy who has a history of treating women badly do it to the next one-I have gotten advice and help on that-They DO not change-  There are many other boards that talk about this very issue-  And-  I read and heard several sources say that most men can not handle a true quality great woman out there-  Most of the time-it is not the woman they meet-it is they GUY himself- 

That is the truth- and so many others have said that-  I will not tolerate crap from any one and boy do they HATE it-   

Most men are jerks and alot will admit that-  

 

 
September 19, 2006, 7:00 am CDT

09/20 Revenge of the Exes

Quote From: wholeperson

Maybe this site should be called "Cannottletitgo.com". Or maybe "Getalife.com". I think we all have been hurt sometime in our life over relationships and marriages that did not work out. If someone leaves you for someone else, the best revenge is let them have each other. And if someone just wants to move on without you, the best revenge is move on and live your life right. To seek revenge towards someone for anything only helps their case. It makes you look like someone who deserved to get dumped in the first place.  This site is for losers and if anyone engages to use it to "hate" others, then they get what they bring on themselves. To take the "high road" and deal with the pain of your emotions without hurting others is a display of strength. To lash out and act like a child displays only weakness.

I agree-revenge is not a good thing- but the bullys and the people are not going to get away with what they do to hurt people-  Called KARMA-

And this site is NOT for losers -   I will not say any more because you too seem angry-  If you don't like the great reality of this site designed to help others-why are you here?

Good site and no one is a loser for seeking help-

Keep on truckin' every one!

 
September 19, 2006, 8:55 pm CDT

snoopy

One day I logged on to one of those peoplesearch sites and paid $19.95 to search addresses,etc for 24 hours. I had so much fun, I am going to do it again sometime. I looked up old classmates, people I worked with, etc. etc. One guy I worked with I remembered because while he was planning his WEDDING with his fiancee  for August  he was sleeping with and getting engaged and planning a new future with a girl at work. He didn't have the guts to break his engagement so waited until she found out thru the grapevine!! He got married a few years later to the new girl after she helped put him thru grad school. So I looked it up and sure, enough, he was no longer married to her either  but moved on to another honey in a different city. Why do women go for these guys? They seem confident but have to have a new woman before they can let go of the last one.
 
September 20, 2006, 1:48 am CDT

09/20 Revenge of the Exes

   I am concerned for the mental health of all the women posting on dontdatehim web site. They sound so hurt, but they don't get the fact that they are not only hurting these guys they are hurting their families and themselves. They vent out and lets be truthful when we are mad and hurt we talk way too much. I think they should learn to forgive and forget. I learned as a child that the one that gets mad first losses. I think that if you are hurt yes you can sit down and write everything that is hurting you but do it in a piece of paper then shred it. I have been hurt by many people but if i would just let it consume me I would not be able to be whole. I hope you get what I am trying to say.
 
September 20, 2006, 1:55 am CDT

It is not worth the pain.

I have an ex that really hurt me in the past, but I would never expose my personal feelings about this person. What ever happened to keeping things private. The whole world does not need to know what kind of heartships you hare going through.  I think that's our problem in the world today. I understand that people get hurt and need to talk about it, but that's what your family and friends are for. Getting revenge does not make your life any easier, it only catches up with you in the long run. The women have too much time on their hands, get a life. What if some guy started a web site like this? There would be a lot of tears rolling out there, and then we would complain that we can't take it. Women, just think about it... is it really worth it. And another thing this was just one guy that complained. Most of these guys really don't care, there will still be another woman that will come along in his life.
 
September 20, 2006, 2:10 am CDT

Todd's Side

I completely agree with Todd, and I hope he wins his lawsuit. 

First I think it is absolutely ridiculous that there is a web site out there to bash on men whom you have dated.  We all have dated one person or another that we would have rather not dated for various reasons, but to get on the world wide web and slander them is asinine. 

Todd said one thing that I totally agreed with, which was, that site could potentially damage his life and his career.  As a lawyer and in this day and age of searching the web, a lot of people could look up his name on the net and end up finding these statements against him, and it could end up detouring people from hiring him as a lawyer.

Another thing I would like to say, is Tasha, seeming like a very scorned woman, would most likely feel just the same as Todd if the shoe was on the other foot.

 
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