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Topic : Black Sheep of the Family?

Number of Replies: 213
New Messages This Week: 0
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Created on : Sunday, September 17, 2006, 11:44:09 am
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Are you the outcast in your family, the one NO one wants to talk about or even acknowledge? What makes you different or unique, and how does it affect others in your family? Share your story here.

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July 28, 2009, 7:59 pm CDT

blacker then even the black sheep

my family is so out of control. ever since i was younger my mother took us away and secluded us away from my fathers family. now that i am older, i have made a decision to remain in contact with them. naturally they were a little hesitant on excepting me after so many years of me being away. thats when the whole concept of black sheep started.  i talked different, i acted different, i had differnet views, religious values, oh and God forbid, i date outside of my race. they could not come to terms with it. then. i got accepted into college. it all went downhill from there. at a time when i should have been celebrating and feeling proud of myself, ive had nothing but problems. they think that i do nothing but have a grand party up here at school. what they fail to recognize is that i am here all by myself, i pay and do everything on my own because the family is not one that is very supportive. they hate that i am doing better then them at the age of 21 then more then half of them already have in their whole life. they can not stand to see the next do better, or get anything better then them. it all comes down to trying to keep eachother down. my fathers side of the family will not lift you up or support you in any way. i guess my strings were drawn when i have finally heard so many lies about me that i decided to stick up for myself. i told them that i was tired of justifying my life and that it is so stressful and too tiresome to have to worry about keeping my head above water, and worrying about what untasteful lie they could scheme up next. i do however get along with a very small number of people on my fathers side, and we decided that we would form a little group. we are the "the bah bah six wooley black sheeps" of our family. my family can not stand that the black sheeps in our large family have come together and started to help eachother out. but even though i have my small group of black sheeps that offer their love, it still is hard because i am even blacker then the black sheeps. i am their burden, the one that they have to go out of their way to get, and out of their way to see. i am trying so hard to be the ONLY person in my family to graduate college, while being a black sheep. its hard. im tired of it. there is so much hurt that my family has caused, that even if they decide to try out my pasture, ill never let them eat my grass thats green when theirs goes brown!
 
July 31, 2009, 12:50 pm CDT

Most Important Message of My Life

I have finally come to realize after 2 decades that my immediate family does not care about me at all.  This is so painful for me.  My mom seems like she does not care about me anymore at all.  She does not return my calls and when I am around her she acts like she no longer wants me around.  You see I am african american and I have been in a successful relationship for 20 years.  My husband is sooo special to me!  He is kind, giving and loving.  His family on the other had are a loving, christian and kind family to us.  My family are non-christians.

Let me stop for a minute and give you a little background on me.  I am a very kind , loving and giving person.  I am non-fake.  I speak how I feel.  When I love someone I love them hard and it is true and genuine love.  I do worry alot about things and I am working on that not to worry so much.  I have tried over the last several years to be a part of my immediate families life.  The pain was so great 15 years ago that I attempted to take my life.  I felt isolated and alone.  I even express these feelings to my mom but she never gives me any type of advice or encouragement.  My family has asked me to co-sign for them for things like a house, car and business due to their bad credit and I declined because financially I did not want to over extend myself.  The only time I hear from my immediate family is when they need something.  When I go around them with my husband my older sister (who is divorced) stays in talks with us in the living room and then she disappears it's like she does not want to be around us.  She always tries to pick agruments with me.  My mom's husband who is white acts like he hates me and does not want me around.  It almost appears like he is prejudice but my mom is african american and darker than I am so that was is a mystery.  My mom looks at me kind of disgustingly and I do not know why.  I am extremely attractive I kind of resemble Kelly Rowland from Destiny's child.  Okay fast forward my family never returns my calls at all.  They never call to see how I am doing.  They act like they no longer want me around.  There so much more I have to say but it would require me writing a book.....lol

The bottom line is today I woke up and I am starting a new life.  I told my husband to have absolutely no contact with my family whatsoever so we can move on with our lives.  They do not want me in their lives and I need to move on.  So they have ousted me into being the Black Sheep of the family.  I am done with them!
 
July 31, 2009, 12:52 pm CDT

Black Sheep of the Family?

Quote From: lostdad23

I have been the blacksheep of my family for years. And now that im ignored and I refuse to call my siblings and mother.my stressed out life has so verymuch been easier. They have sabotaged my life since childhood, lied and stolen from me. they even sided with my ex during the custody battle of my kids.

Now, everyone who matters (mainy my kids) are seeing them as what they are.

I dont hate them, I just washed my life free of them. after several years of not being told about family reunions etc and family functions i was deeply hurt, then it occured to me ,its best to let them be and live without. I dont suffer anxiety attacks worrying  wha they are going to do to disgrace me or turn my life upside down.

to be honest the only one i care about now is my sick dad who doesnt partake in the dasterdly deeds.

 

I feel your pain and as of today I am done with my family.  It is painful but I have moved on now.  (((Hugs))) hang in there your strong and loving heart will get you through this.  Trust me!  ((Hugs))
 
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