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Topic : Reigniting Romance in Your Relationship

Number of Replies: 1032
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Created on : Sunday, September 17, 2006, 04:03:12 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Has the fire gone out in your love life? Share your ways to reignite romance in your relationship.

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April 6, 2009, 3:21 am CDT

When was the last time...

Quote From: kog1113

My husband and I have been married for over four years and have gone from having a fun, incredibly compatible, loving relationship to one where I am more of a caregiver and roommate. We have endured MANY things in such a short time - surgeries, family illnesses, our own medical issues, career changes, and just whatever life obstacles have been put before us. My husband had an incredibly weird upbringing and consequently is emotionally very needy. His older brother was born with considerable health issues and his parents, mainly his Mom, focused ALL attention on his brother. This left my husband "out in the cold" so to speak - being sent off to neighbors and his grandma's for long periods of time while his parents dealt with his brother's challenges. Over the past four plus years, I think I've tried to compensate for his lack of care by taking it upon myself to care for him in a way that his parents never did. This has left us in a weird spot.

 

We both love each other and both want to be husband and wife rather than what we've become. Sex hasn't happened in months and lost passion long before that. Intimacy, in any way shape or form, has become almost non-existant. Any suggestions would be more than welcomed!

the two of you went on a carribean vacation? There is something about blue waters, strong rum drinks, and warm breeze, to make anyone want to be romantic.  If all else has failed, save your pennies and go on a short carribean vacation. If that doesn't work then you know it is doomed.  Good luck and get packing. :)  And for the record, no, I do not work in the travel agency business.  KIMI

 
April 27, 2009, 5:58 am CDT

Sad, worried, distraught

My wife and I have different personalities.  She is a highly driven career woman and I am more laid back in my approach to life.  I've made mistakes and I've been downright lazy, giving in to depression..letting it sap my motivation.    She also feels I'm not "there for her" the way I should be.  I really want to be and it saddens me that she feels this way.  I feel like that capacity is within me, I just don't know how to let it out I guess.

 

  We've argued about this throughout our relationship, but now it has really come to a head.  She says she's not happy anymore and we sleep in seperate bedrooms.

 

We're in counciling...I just hope it helps us.  I love my wife and I don't want to lose her.

 

Has anyone been in a similar situation and pulled things back together?  Can you offer some advice?

 
May 15, 2009, 9:30 am CDT

Dr. Phil I need help with my marriage

Hello;

 

I'm 31 years old and have been married for 8 years going on 9. My marriage is on the brink of disaster and I don't want it to end. I have lied to my wife numerous times and hurt her so bad that she doesn't really know me anymore. I can't say anything to her without hoping that she will believe me in the end. How can I save my marriage and reignite the flame we once had 8 years ago?

 
May 21, 2009, 1:50 pm CDT

help please

I really need help with getting my family back.
familyovereverything.blogspot.com has the whole story. Any
inspirational comments or even negative is welcome I'm willing to try
anything to get her back!
 
May 22, 2009, 3:06 am CDT

Without reading the blog

Quote From: marcusatx

I really need help with getting my family back.
familyovereverything.blogspot.com has the whole story. Any
inspirational comments or even negative is welcome I'm willing to try
anything to get her back!

First thing that comes to mind is:  YOu can't undo something that was already done.  You can redo something that was not done correctly.  If we break something, we try to fix it so that it resembles what it was like before it was broke. Sometimes it can recover 100%sometimes we have to settle for the broken but salvagable thing. Sometimes the darn thing just can't be fixed. Maybe not the right or strong enough glue, parts, inexperience. Maybe it wasn't that good to begin with which is why it broke? Or maybe it was very fragile and we didn't realize how much so.

 

The same with love and relationships. We are not going to do it right every time, or if we break trust, loyality, make bad choices, the relationship gets damaged, much like the crystal in the car trunk.....Next time we know what not to do, and what to do better, but it does not always mean we will get to do it with the same person/crystal lamp that we had once before.

 

If the relationship is over and your were left behind, pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and get back on the track. Its the only way. Kim

 
May 23, 2009, 4:06 am CDT

One more thing, Marcus.

Don't forget to allow yourself time to grieve the loss/change. It is very important to our self worth that we set personal boundaries, treat ourselves good, and to be aware when we are not. Your self esteem is hurting now, meaning it is how you feel in this given moment (looks, talent, our work, etc)........self worth is how we feel about ourselves in general. Our worth to society, others, ourselves, that can never be taken away. Tap more into your self worth and see that judgements can only last so long, but the beauty that resides within you can never be removed. YOu were born worthy!

 

 

 
May 31, 2009, 2:09 am CDT

sex addict

 

I think i'm a sex addict i always think about sex, and i feel horny all the time and i musturbate everyday. i do have a boyfriend he does not like sex, he wants it once a week but i want to have it everyday, ican;t get enough of it......

 

does this mean am addicted? plz help !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 

 
June 1, 2009, 1:50 pm CDT

No. Wanting sex every day does not constitute a sex addict.

Quote From: zet881229

 

I think i'm a sex addict i always think about sex, and i feel horny all the time and i musturbate everyday. i do have a boyfriend he does not like sex, he wants it once a week but i want to have it everyday, ican;t get enough of it......

 

does this mean am addicted? plz help !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 

If you go outside the relationship for sex (since your boyfriends sex drive is different then yours) and have sex with other people, then you may be. If you seriously do not feel you can live without sex every day, and masturbating does not satisfy, then you may be a sex addict. Most people I know masturbate daily.


 
June 4, 2009, 4:01 pm CDT

AVLIMIL is baaack!

Just saw a really stupid ad on TV for Avlimil. Saw not heard, since I mute all commercials.
I can't believe they're marketing this stuff again! It didn't work for the women who tried it in the past. Guess they're hoping enough time has gone by that everyone's forgotten. But, I haven't forgotten. I was even solicited to join a class-action lawsuit. But, didn't feel like making some lawyer rich and famous.
 
June 10, 2009, 10:38 am CDT

Reigniting Romance in Your Relationship

Quote From: zet881229

 

I think i'm a sex addict i always think about sex, and i feel horny all the time and i musturbate everyday. i do have a boyfriend he does not like sex, he wants it once a week but i want to have it everyday, ican;t get enough of it......

 

does this mean am addicted? plz help !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 

An addiction is defined as something that gets in the way of you functioning normally. There is nothing wrong with a lot of masturbating, watching some occasional porn, fantasizing, having a high libido, .... If, on the other hand, you would frequently be late for work etc. because you feel you MUST masturbate or watch porn, if you cheat on your boyfriend or lie to your environment in order to have sexual contact you feel you need, if your satisfaction generally becomes more important than for example social contact and it causes you to neglect your friends,... That's addiction. But from your post I can't conclude anything like that.
 
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