Topic : He/She Won't Commit!

Since you are unclear as to whether or not you two have a future together I would have a heart to heart conversation with him asking him to clarify your previous discussions.  His statements have left you trying to guess and read his mind so clarification is in order.  If in fact he is still second guessing himself as to whether or not he wants to be a part of your family after 2 years tells me that he is not up for that challenge. 

You sound like a person who knows what she wants and has clear hopes and dreams for your future unfortunately he may no longer share those same goals.  Talk to him one last time and make your decision after you truly understand  where his head is at.  There's no sense in prolonging the inevitable especially since you have a daughter to think about as well.  Best of luck to you.  

My daughter has always been very headstrong, independent and decisive about things she wants, or so I thought until she started dating.

She has been talking to a guy for about a year now, wouldn't agree to start dating him until about three months ago, broke up with him about a week and a half ago, got back together this past Tuesday, and now is questioning her decision just after two days.

We have talked for hours! We are a very close knit family that can talk about anything and she has confided in me that she has such a fatalistic view of relationships and marriage, which is odd to me because she was raised in a home where her parents love each other (married for 22 years), grandparents on both sides that have been faithful and loyal (married for 44 and 45 years), and the guy that she is with is incredibly sweet, loyal and loves her to death. She is also very loyal to her friends. They can pretty much do anything to her, have any kind of faults, and she still is their friend. But when it comes to having a boyfriend, and I get the strong indication that it wouldn't matter who it is, she is so afraid to the point it is stunting any opportunity to grow. Like she is putting her life on hold because she knows that the relationship requires work and love and patience. And yet, when I get her to take a moment to talk about the things she loves about him, I can't get her to shut up. How can I help her to overcome this debilitating fear she has?

 I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years now and we share 2 children together. He lies to me all the time and doesnt seem to think he needs to tell me where hes been. He has cheated on me in the past. For example when he goes to school, he has breaks and friends etc just like most people. When he comes home I out of interest in him and his life and also out of lack of trust ask him what he did today. He tells me he sat in the cafeteria. A couple days later I find out he went to a friends house. I confront him and he tells me he didnt think it mattered. So why didnt he just tell me why not just say he went to his friends house?

I am a stay at home mom and do everything for the kids and around the house but he is always needing his "leizure time". I am never included in any of this nor does he usually tell me the whole story about where he had been or who he was with as once again "I am not his mom and he didnt think it mattered or we dont need to be attached at the hip" Am I the only one with a boyfriend that seems to think he doesnt need to tell me what goes on in his life or that I am entitled to the truth especially after infedelity??? How do I get him to understand that I have the right to know these things or that I matter too??

In most relationships, initially, one person likes the other a little more and is better able to make a decision on whether it is permenant or not. Some people don't want to commit so soon because they are still uncertain about what they want.  We cant' make someoe love us....it has to happen naturally.  It is very tempting to want security, closure, guarantees with someone that we care about and want in our lives, but, the one thing that rings true in most cases, is, be careful what you ask you because you just may get it and then realize its not what you wanted.!!  So, when in asking for love, intimacy, etc. from him, look and see what it is that is making so desperate to have it be with him.

The fact that he won't call you his girlfriend is because maybe he is waiting for the sex.  If you have already had sex, then it is already an intimate relationship but it just might not be what he wants. Good luck.

ok so .. i think i wanna leave my bf bc i dont think hes going to commit ... i gave him a month and told him if it doesnt happen by then were done ... if he askes me wen i dont want to anymore , ill say no , i dont care who he asks me infront of im done!! ... he says he wants to be 23 or 24 wen he askes me , well we planned on having another baby by then , so im either going to just have had a baby or pregnant again , i told him if he asks then im leaving him ... i hate being w/ him bc of this =( .. any advice