I completely understand what you are going through. Though, our situations are different, we both have the same initial problem: low sex drive. My husband and I haven't been married very long either. My sex drive practicly disappeared not long after becoming pregnant for the first time and has not returned since. He is a one year old now, and not a thing has changed with my sex drive. I still have no desire. I am on birth control pills and I am contimplating not taking them anymore and resorting to condoms for birthcontrol to see if it makes any difference. My husband is great in practicly every area, but nothing seems to make me turned on. He wants it ALL THE TIME, and I don't ever want it. HELP!!
Since I got pregnant i never want sex, its very occaional and im only twenty years old. im not on birth control and it still hasnt' gone back to normal. im afraid he'll leave me because he always wants it and i never want to. i don't know what to do and it worries me
I have been married for 37 years , my husband is not interested in sex anymore , it has been like this now for 18 years my hear is broken , and I feel empty and worthless , when he has a vacation he always picks a fight the first day , so he knows I wont talk to him , its strange because when he works he is always happy and glad to see me everynight when he comes home , I am confused . I would love to leave him but have no money so its just hopeless , I would be so very grateful for any advice thankyou
I have been living with David for 5 years. He has CHANGED over the last 2 years. I am usually always dressed up - with pantyhose, high heels, cute dresses, etc., but it has gotten to the point over time that I MUST dress like this every night for HIM. The sluttier the dress the better. I do always looking my best, but sometimes a girl just wants to veg out in her p.j.'s, do her toenails, and just be a girl. I can't do this. Every night it is like an unwritten rule that I provide this "performance". If I don't wear hose, heels and a short skirt, then there is a temper tantrum. He says "I do everything for you! I give you everything you want and this is how you treat me?!" And then there is arguing. I feel guilty. I have been getting severely depressed to the point where I am always having panic attacks and have gone through so much Xanax and Ativan, etc., that my doctor won't give me any more. I truly need some help. I don't have any family to go to or friends..... I feel soooooo alone.
I am so glad it's not just me. Hmmm you do have a plan there, when he comes back into town I think I will approach him that way right off the bat when he's in the mood after 3 months of being away. Oh did I mention too that my husband is 17 years my junior. I am 56 and he is turning 40. I wonder if it has something to do with immaturity? Or is it just a man thing.
I think this is something they are born with. I'm 10 yrs older. I'm 40 and he's 30. He is real mature, thats what got me. I could have deep conversation or just have fun. He was raised by Mother so he had to grow up faster than the normal child. But when it comes the bedroom well we know. But I think that happens with most men. I did try to turn the tables, oh no, He LIKED it. So we are in a no win situation.
My husbandof two years is a lousy lover. It only takes two minutes and its done. I've spent the last two years trying to teach him but he cant be taught hpw to do me. He's 40yrs old and performs like a teen age boy. He's a drunk and I hate him everyday. I want him to leave but there is always a reason why he cant. MY EX ON THE OTHER HAN IS A MASTER OF SEX!!! Him and i dont get along but can do sex like he invented it!!! Just the way I like it. I cant and wont be with the ex...but will go to bed with him anytime he wants. Dont want any part of my husband at all. Thinking about just living alone and calling ex twice a week to do me. I belive i can live with that. Dont really want to live with any man. Happy living with just my kids. What you think
What worked for me when my first hubby was that way I came up with a plan. I went to bed took some toys and knocked myself out. He of corse felt left out and confused. Then he wanted tobe apart of what mad me soooo happy
I was on line today in my Facebook account and saw that my husband had posted some new pictures of the co-op where he grew up as a child. I saw that he had also sent out an invitation for all his on line friends that lived in that area back in the 80's to come out and see each other again. His actual words were " who's up for a crazy night? There are both men and women invited- mostly women though--and all single! (He's the organizer)
This is my dilema- we have been having some problems over the last little while in our marriage. He has said to me that he's been feeling smothered- that he wants some more independance-?? Want to go out with my friends more- Not really sure what that means exactly. We are not intimate at all anymore- (he's in therapy)..He has asked me to be patient-while he sorts out his feelings..(I'm basically lost- don't know what happened- it's just fallen apart)-
I want to know wether I should ask him about the invite that he sent out- wait till he mentions it to me- or just let it go- I feel that he is deliberately keeping it from me and I feel that it's disrespectful to me and our marrige- I know that he has no intention on including me in the festivities. even though the invitation said you are welcome to bring a friend. Please give me your thoughts? Am I over exaggerating!
I have been living with David for 5 years. He has CHANGED over the last 2 years. I am usually always dressed up - with pantyhose, high heels, cute dresses, etc., but it has gotten to the point over time that I MUST dress like this every night for HIM. The sluttier the dress the better. I do always looking my best, but sometimes a girl just wants to veg out in her p.j.'s, do her toenails, and just be a girl. I can't do this. Every night it is like an unwritten rule that I provide this "performance". If I don't wear hose, heels and a short skirt, then there is a temper tantrum. He says "I do everything for you! I give you everything you want and this is how you treat me?!" And then there is arguing. I feel guilty. I have been getting severely depressed to the point where I am always having panic attacks and have gone through so much Xanax and Ativan, etc., that my doctor won't give me any more. I truly need some help. I don't have any family to go to or friends..... I feel soooooo alone.
David has too much control over your personal power. You should be able to live a happy and comfortable life, and if that means wearing pj’s sometimes or painting toenails once in awhile, then that is what you should do! David’s going to have a tantrum, you already know that. His behavior is predictable. Think about what will happen tonight if you don’t dress up. You can probably predict exactly what he will say and then, exactly what you will say. My advice to you is to change this script. Instead of staying in this toxic, unhealthy pattern, tonight, respond to his tantrum in a different way. You have no power to change the way that he is, but you can change the way that you respond to his words and actions. You can and should refuse to engage in the argument that you know will happen. He is going to attempt to make you feel badly, so again, be ready. Ask yourself this: why am I allowing this man to control the way that I live in my own home? Why is his happiness more important then my happiness? Answer these questions honestly. Do you allow him to treat you badly because you feel that is what you deserve? I don’t know you, but I do know that you deserve to be treated with kindness and respect. That is simple common courtesy, especially to the person you love. Xanax and Ativan are not the answers for you. If you feel the need to turn to prescription drugs so that you can live peacefully with someone, then there is a huge problem and no amount of medication will cure it. The cure is space apart. The cure is conversation, not arguing; compromise, not dominate.
hi, first post, first time looking for advice, don't know what to do anymore. I've been married for seven years and they have been good ones, ok, with their up and downs, but still thats how you grow together. So the last couple of months have been really rough, I don't understand my wife, so she says, and she just wants opposite of what I want. Past two months all she wants to do is spend time with these two guys in our house smoking pot and really not doing anything until hours in the morning, I would be ok with it like I have told just because I know them and they are alright and all, but every night is pushing it, she prefers to be with them than coming to bed with her husband and they are always around, how are we to solve our marital matters if I don't even get a chance to spend time with my wife, especially after the kids are gone to bed. its not bad enough she gives these guys her time but at the worst time when the kids need her most,our daughter does not get that much attention and she is 12 and looking for guidance from her mother, I get so frustrated and angry and at times the worst comes out and I feel she is making me pay for whatever, never had an affair, i forgave hers, true its brought up in fights and all. all I want is my wife back from these two new best friends.
My husband and i been married for 4 years and i say 2 years into the marriage he brings up that he wants to swing, not to mention that he said he been into it since high school. How i do handle this? I am not into swinging and not sure what it really is, i heard that it is swaping partners, any ways ai dont want anything to do with it and i think i made a mistake of going to parties of that enviroment with him, and i only went cause it is something he enjoys. I regret even going, now we argu when a party comes up and i dont want to go. So i feel like i am trapped in a marriage and we have 2 young kids that are involved. Someone please help me!!!!
I have been living with David for 5 years. He has CHANGED over the last 2 years. I am usually always dressed up - with pantyhose, high heels, cute dresses, etc., but it has gotten to the point over time that I MUST dress like this every night for HIM. The sluttier the dress the better. I do always looking my best, but sometimes a girl just wants to veg out in her p.j.'s, do her toenails, and just be a girl. I can't do this. Every night it is like an unwritten rule that I provide this "performance". If I don't wear hose, heels and a short skirt, then there is a temper tantrum. He says "I do everything for you! I give you everything you want and this is how you treat me?!" And then there is arguing. I feel guilty. I have been getting severely depressed to the point where I am always having panic attacks and have gone through so much Xanax and Ativan, etc., that my doctor won't give me any more. I truly need some help. I don't have any family to go to or friends..... I feel soooooo alone.
