Topic : Sex

My daughter will never come home pregnant at 15. She is and will be raised properly. She has her debutant ball to loook forward to at 16 and there is a Catillion at her school in grades 9,10 & 11. That is when they are introduced to boys. 

  

If however, she does make the mistake of getting pregnant I would show her no mercy. Don't come to me crying fowl because you (being my daughter) made a mistake. So yes I would tell her it was her choice to sleep with the boy and so she will have to live with the consequesnces...I have a saying when she mis-behaves...l ask her if she can say "welcome to wal-mart" because if you mess up that will be the only job you will be prepared for.... 

I don't know where you got your info but my daughter is 5 and she is in preschool. My youngest is only 3 and sheis well on her way as well. As far as the time they had with daddy, they had fun doing things that little girls enjoy doing...............

I wouldn't say it will never happen to you.  My sister and I were raised in a "good catholic home" and went to Catholic private schools.  My sister at 15 fell pregnant.  My father then kicked her out and my husband and I took her in.  Everyone at some stage has made a bad choice, but isn't it our job as parents ( I have two young children of my own and as I said have had my sister since she was 15) to provide our children with as Dr Phil would say "a soft place to fall".  Can you imagine what a young girl in this circumstance would be going through?  I must say your "Welcome to Wal-mart" comment is a little harsh, don't you think?  At least these people have jobs!  My sister has finished her HSC and is in her 2nd year of university to become a teacher.  I have the up most pride and respect for her for stepping up to the plate and taking responsibility for herself and her daughter, who is now 4.  Yes she made a bad choice, yes she was young and had to grow up very quickly but she did.  And she is one of the best mothers I know.

 My husband and I have been married for 7 years. Our seventh just came around in Feb. and to no prevail I did not receive as much as a card. We have 2 children one from my previous marriage. My husband is on his first marriage with me. My previous marriage ended because my then husband thought sex outside the marriage was a good thing. :) BOY was he wrong.

SO, FOR 7 YEARS we have been struggling with our sex life. We go months without any intimate relations. I get a "grandpa" kiss before he goes to work, me to bed and whenever we depart. That's it. I feel trapped, lonely and desperate.
We have talked and talked and talked. We have tried therapy twice. My therapist now wants me to put my feelings about my marriage aside and start to pursue my education. I somewhat agree with her only because the emotions I am feeling are too real to deal with. I would rather ignore them. But here is the catch. I have been in many situations where the opposite sex has approached me and given me the open to cheat. I am literally afraid to go into a sitaution where I am with a person of the opposite sex. Rather it be school, shopping or where ever. I know my weaknesses. I have always said I would never cheat on anyone. Especially in my marriage. I hold that to be true to this day. BUT...........because I am weak I do not know if I would be able to refrain and hold true to what I always promised myself and my husband. I am sad to even have that fear. I am so mad at my husband for not giving me what he knows I need. What is only human and shared. I go to bed and dream of other men. Because, I guess, in my mind my husband in unable to provide me with what these men in my dreams provide me with.
This all seems like a bad dream - when I am awake.
I sent my husband to a Doc. to get checked out. He was OK. We talk about how to help him, but he claims he does not even know why he is like this. He claims to have a sex drive and still we don't have sex. He is not being real with me somehow and I wonder if he is a cheater.
All I know is that these insecurities do not apply to a marriage. They do to mine and I don't know what to do anymore. GET out..............OR wait some more. I know nothing is going to change. What about the kids? What about our house? Would it be easier to leave than stay? My kids would be torn if they did not have the 2 of us together. So would it be easier for me to swallow my pain for the sake for the kids? I just don't know anymore!

Can you help me move a couch on the week end??? My sense of humor is not warped, at least that is what my team of psychiatrists tells me...

so, you would throw YOUR daughter out to the curb if she came home pregnant? Now, that is a wonderful and loving daddy!!!!!!!!! Now, I can understand making her own up to her responsibilities and all that, which is something that my husband and I have actually talked about, the what if's. We would still love our daughters and we would help in ways that was needed BUT she would be the mommy and she will have to kiss her teen life goodbye, as she would be coming home from school and she would be the one taking care of the child and she would be the one to pay the sitters, but I would never kick my teen age daughter out, two wrongs does not make a right..... ................I believe in accountability and consequences for our actions but to turn a teen ager and her unborn child out on the street will not be teaching her anything but rejection and selfless worth and then hard telling what would happen to her.................................... As I said, I believe in accountability and all that but I also believe in loving and caring for another and teaching and guiding them, realizing that no one is perfect............We are teaching our children that marriage and sex go together and the best and right choice is to wait, fall in love, get married and THEN have children and yes, that is exactly how mommy and daddy did it, even though I was raised like crap, I was smarter then every one else in my family.............................................And as far as the Bible goes, I am a Christian as well as hubby and we follow the NT as Christ is our example and we believe in His teachings. I love the lessons in the OT, and though I believe everything that happened in the NT as true, we are not living in the OT times, for things changed with the coming of the Christ......................I am very strong in my beliefs and I have convictions and I stand by them in all that I do and say, and though I make mistakes, I know where to turn to for help.............................really, all of us as parents are in the same boat, we love our children and we want what is best for them and we want them to be successful in life so if we want these things and so much more, we must be there for our children, not to cater to them but to guide and direct them and sometimes that may mean some tough love, but to degrade them and make them fel worthless, well, they will just go down hill further then what they have already did.......................Like I said, I grew up like crap, a bad home life but I had many great influences in my life and I chose to follow their teachings and guidance therefore I am happy, successful and I have a wonderfula nd beautiful family who is loving and fun to be around..............I have a sister on the other hand who chose the opposite route of living and is now living a very sad life, who will not accept help of any kind and is full of hate and bitterness and her kids, well, I won't go there. So I personally choose to love and respect my children, to teach and guide them in the path that they should go and at the same time teach them that we must own up to our life decissions, whetehr good or bad....................Any way, didn't mean to talk, well type so much but man, I got myself started but I am done for now hehehehehe........................... the girls are done doing their little projects and now WE off to cook some dinner, do a load of laundry, and get my daughter busy finding things that start with the letter "O" to fill her basket, the child is 5 and in preschool and she has homework LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL. SHe loves her class and teacher but she really does need more of a challenge, hopefully kinder will get her that, if not then the child will be homeschooled for sure, of course we already teach her and our little one here........................imgisfor, just out of curiosity, how do you feel about homeschooling?....................yeaa, I know this is the sex board but I was just curious....though I do think sex is a wonderful topic and a great asset for good marriages :)

my husband is Jewish, a Christian Jew. Of course he is not a practising Jew as He has been converted to Christianity and was already before I met him. We met in a little church that I was ministering and active in.

no thanks, got a fun and interesting weekend planned with hubby, MY plans by the way and he will be mighty happy and on cloud nine by the end of the weekend :), Who knows what can happen!!!! I get a lot of slack from people who think I am selfish for even thinking about a nother baby, as I will be 43 on my next birthday hehehee, Boy, I love my life. :)

Under no circumstances would I ever throw one of my kids out on to the streets.  She made a mistake, a life changing one YES.  But she didn't go out intentionally trying to hurt someone.  She has succeeded partly b/c my husband and I gave her a place to stay, food, clothing but most importantly we gave her encouragement and instilled in her confidence enough that just b/c she was now going to be a teenage single mum didn't mean her life had to come to a standstill.  We encouraged her to go back to school and I currently look after her daughter whilst she is a uni.  These are all things my father should have been doing if not out of love like we have then out of RESPONSIBILITY!  When you are a parent it is your responsibility to care for your child no matter what - not just toss them out like garbage.   

  

As for your misguided views on childbirth, I have had 2 natural drug-free labor's and I do not look at it as a "burden" or "punishment"  I loved every minute of being pregnant and the labor was fantastic.  i looked at every contraction as getting me one step closer to my beautiful children.  the birth of a child is a miracle not a punishment.   

  

Before my daughter started at school (KG) she was homeschooled by mom starting at age 2 1/2. Our daughter was born with a very rare genetic eye disorder, 1/100,000 . There are only 3700 people in the US and only 350 in Canada. Because of this we started visual stimulation at age 1 and from there it extended into full blow home schooling. By 4 she was defined as a "derogation" which meant she underwent a psychological battery of tests to see if she would be allowed into KG at an earlier age. She passed the psych. tests with flying colours and the entrance exam to her private school as well. So at 4 she was in KG and now at 10 she will be finishing Gr.5. She is on track to graduate from HS at 16. She is anywhere from 1 to 2 1/2 years younger than her peers. I am sort of glad, because at graduation she will just have turned 16 so no bars/parties. I have told her that when she graduates for her sweet sixteen she can choose between 1)bringing 3 friends to DisneyWorld for a week or 2)A family trip back to europe but no boys. Her school is a very good girsl school so $$$ aside if I can have her in a good school vs. the home schooling idea I would rather the mainstream. It gives her a chance to hone the inter-personal skills, teaches her that "kill or be killed" attitude. It also enforces competition which is very prevolent in the real world. Also given that I am bilingual and so is my wife, we want our daughter to be multi lingual. She already knows english/french and 2 years ago took spanish as an extra-carricular but in Gr7 the girls must take a 4th language and she is leaning towards "mandarine" so I would have never been able to provide her with that level of schooling. I would go with the mainstream if the system or local school is adequate...I often joke that I am sending her to the best private school so she is only exposed to the really good drugs!!!!