Message Boards

Home

Message Boards

Topic : 12/20 Marry Me or Else!

Number of Replies: 684

New Messages This Week: 0

Last Reply On:

Created on : Friday, September 22, 2006, 12:20:09 pm

Author : DrPhilBoard1

(Original Air Date: 09/26/06) It’s do or die for the men today, as their partners tell them to either walk down the aisle or walk the highway! Tony and Mary have dated for 12 years, and have been engaged for eight. Mary wants to set a wedding date, but Tony says even after all these years, he’s not ready and still feels pressured to tie the knot. Does Tony fear getting married or getting married to Mary? Then, Rosanna has been dating her boyfriend, Dennis, for almost five years and says she’s tired of “playing house.” Dennis maintains that he told Rosanna from the start he didn’t want to get married. Should they just throw in the towel and move on? Plus, Robin shares some relationship tips, and the women finally take a stand and issue ultimatums for their men! Join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.

More December 2006 Show Boards.

As of January, 2009, this message board will become "Read Only" and will be closed to further posting. Please join the NEW Dr. Phil Community to continue your discussions, personalize your message board experience, start a blog and meet new friends.

( Subscribe to this Topic )

sunnytea88

Message Emote
frustrated

September 26, 2006, 1:49 pm PDT

GET A CLUE

C'mon ladies, please tell me you can be more than just a doormat? 5,8,9,10,11,12, 13 years and still no committment? Please..... His level of committment is just what he has shown and WHY OH WHY would you want to marry him in the first place after he has dangled the allmighty ring like a carrot over your head? Cut your emotional losses and move on!!!

And to the men out there that think they are being honest by saying..."but I told her I didn't want to get married again". Well I got news for you pal(s)..... then STAY SINGLE and don't embark on a relationship with anyone else in the first place. Stay out of single bars, stay away from fix ups and focus on your children. Using women for your "steady piece" but keeping her on an emotional roller coaster of "what if" is cruel, self serving and narcassistic.

What creeps!!!

Please oh please women... GET A CLUE!!!

Read Replies to this Message

grandlambert

User Mood
Happy

Message Emote
happy

September 26, 2006, 1:52 pm PDT

Together for 11 Years

I have been a widow since May 1992 - i met my fiance' in Dec.1993 we dated occasionally for 2 years. He is a widower twice and divorced once. he is 6 years older than I. He put a diamond on my finger for christmas of 1995. And also ask me to marry him. I replied with - some day! Well, that someday has not gotten here yet. I have 4 grown children 2 of which were home when we got together he has 3. We all get along fine. We DON't need that piece of paper to make us committed or happy. We are BOTH!! I love him just as much as he loves me and we plan on being together 'till death do us part! Life is short - as we both have learned - we don't worry about the paper work. We want to be happy. I am the one skeptical due to the fact of changing my last name - different than my children. There are a lot of factors - including my deceased husbands retirement/pension that we have put away for our children. We are Very happy - - THAT'S WHAT COUNTS!!

Read Replies to this Message

bawrww

User Mood
Cranky

Message Emote

September 26, 2006, 1:58 pm PDT

BUH-BY

Hey, Mary. He looks like he could be your grandpa. Find a GENTLEMAN who wants the same things you do. I can't picture him with children. He should have GRANDchildren by now.

Read Replies to this Message

mjoan27

User Mood
Happy

Message Emote
upset

September 26, 2006, 2:00 pm PDT

Girlfriend

Rosanna, girlfriend, you don't want to marry this arrogant man. He has used you in all ways. You are a nice woman, kind, and you have rationalized that if you could marry him, it would be ok. Sometimes it is not right to marry the one we love. You are far too good for the likes of him. I can guarantee you that if you were able to force him to marry you, you would end up unhappy because he would throw it up to you every chance he got. He is waiting to see if someone better will come along. LEAVE him NOW. Don't marry him even if he wants to. You go find yourself someone who appreciates you and have a nice life!! Texas

Read Replies to this Message

lizt1103

User Mood
Cheerful

Message Emote
hopeful

September 26, 2006, 2:00 pm PDT

pushing marriage is not the answer

Quote From: bound4wy

I don't think that anyone should push the marriage issue. I know from experience with my second husband. We were together five years before we set a wedding date. When I tried to push the issue, he would clam up and refuse to talk about it. I decided it was best to not talk about it until he was ready. Well we have been married for two years now and we couldn't be happier. I knew that when he was ready, it would be wonderful. I wouldn't have wanted him to marry me just because I was pressuring him to marry me. Hang in there.....sometimes they will surprise you....

If these guys need time and space to decide, then they should give that to the men. They should also move out with their girlfriend. With time to think and decide then the correct decision will be made. I know I wouldn't have lasted with some one who said right from the start he didn't want to get married. For me it would have been a mis match.

It will be interesting to see what they decide to do.

Read Replies to this Message

lgilmo

User Mood
Happy

Message Emote
frustrated

September 26, 2006, 2:03 pm PDT

You are so RIGHT

Quote From: sunnytea88

What creeps!!!

Please oh please women... GET A CLUE!!!

You said it all perfectly. Both parties are crazy!! And I've got a hint for the lady with the boyfriend 17 years older - get out now! My husband is ten years older and I am in a committed marriage BUT I would not recommend to anyone to marry someone so much older. I can really tell a difference now that I'm 50 and he's 60. When we met 24 years ago it was not that big of deal.

Read Replies to this Message

fmthomas

User Mood
Happy

Message Emote
chillin'

September 26, 2006, 2:06 pm PDT

Be careful what you ask for ladies

That Dennis guy is such a crock. He talks about the statistic of unhappy married people, what about the unhappy single folk.

In life there are no guarantees. As the old saying goes WE are not promised tomorrow.

Move your milk on to greener pastures ladies. These guys are cowards and they are showing you THEY are not worthy.

Read Replies to this Message

mjoan27

User Mood
Happy

Message Emote

September 26, 2006, 2:07 pm PDT

Tony is sick

Quote From: cuddles05

WHY DO YOU THINK TONY IS SICK.THE GUY TOLD HER HE DID'NT WANT TO GET MARRIED.AND SHE STAYED JUST LIKE I DID.AND ABOUT SEX YES YOUR RIGHT YOU CAN GET SEX FROM OTHER PLACES.BUT DO YOU REALLY WANT TO.WHAT ABOUT STD'S AND OTHER THINGS YOU CAN GET FROM THESE SO CALLED OTHER PLACES.AT LEAST SHE KNOW'S WHERE SHES GETTING THE SEX FROM AND IT'S SAFE.YOU HAVE TO BE A HOOKER TO GET IT OTHER PLACES.

KATHY

It is obvious that Tony is mentally ill. He is confused and has a difficult time making sense. My aunt sits at a dining table with a man who has alzheimers and talks just like him..........He is not really making sense, but is trying real hard to..........again.........I advise you don't marry him even if he is "willing to marry you if I will lose you." After all this time, cut and run with your loss.

Read Replies to this Message

sunnytea88

Message Emote

September 26, 2006, 2:07 pm PDT

Get a Clue - continued

I wanted to get out one more thing. As I read other women's posts regarding their long drawn out committment phobe men I can say just a few things...

Yes, it will be painful to leave. Afterall when you realize you have invested more in a relationship than someone else has, it is very painful.

When you have children together, you have to deal with this person for the rest of your life. But that doesn't mean you have to live feeling like you missed out just because of the choices your partner has made regarding his level of committment.

Finally, there is one thing that I wish more women had. That is the ability to be single and NOT feel inadequate for doing so. If more women could be just themselves and not have to be known as someone's wife, girlfriend, etc. the better off they would be. You need to enjoy being you without having someone to "complete" you. You need to be complete all on your own!

With that I wish women the inner strength to give themselves permission to move on and be o.k. at the possibility of being alone!

I can attest that when I stopped looking so hard for MR. Right when all I found was MR. Wrong's and started enjoying life all on my own and appreciating my life as it was, is when I found my best friend who I now call my husband!

Good luck to you ladies, become your own person!!!!

Read Replies to this Message

rugman1

User Mood
Happy

Message Emote

September 26, 2006, 2:13 pm PDT

Ladies

Quote From: jenc225

I find myself sailing in this same boat!! Glad to know that I am not alone -- my boyfriend/fiance and I have been together for 13 years and he cannot take the next step to marry me either! I have been given beautiful diamonds and asked but he just can't do it. And now it is like a forbidden topic of conversation it has driven a wedge between us to the point that I am now in the process of trying to get my life together to leave him for good. I mean I have supported him for 13 years in the things he has wanted to do career wise and when I want this one thing it just doesn't fall in his radar screen. So, without his knowledge I am preparing to leave - some may say that that isn't fair but neither is stringing me along for 13 years! It's time for me to stand up for me and take care of what I want and to heck with this, I guess if he truly loved me it probably wouldn't be an issue would it?!

To all the ladies who have done nothing but complain about there boyfriends not marrying them.If a man wants to marry you,he will.Why do you all think you deserve marriage,the cooking,cleaning and bed time,isnt your man also doing things as well,the manly chores?Relationships are 50/50.What will a piece of paper do for you,is he going to love you more?I think not.If your man has been with you for a long time and things are good and your both loving each other,then why pressure your man.If two people love each other then they should be together,one should not be giving conditions to the other .

Read Replies to this Message

First | Prev | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | Next | Last

Recent Shows: Dr. Phil Family Returns: ... | Cut the Cord | "Will My Mother-in-Law De... | Shocking School Sex Abuse... | P.I. Moms: The Truth Behi...