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Topic : 11/23 Love Scams?

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Created on : Friday, September 22, 2006, 12:23:18 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 09/28/06) It begins on a dating Web site with flattering e-mails and IMs with handsome photos attached. The man pours on the charm and soon professes love, but he needs money -- to pay medical bills, fund investments and, most importantly, to get back home to the States and finally meet his long-distance love. Is his love for real, or just an elaborate con? Despite being taken for thousands of dollars in bogus money orders, Dee-Dee believes the man she knows as Cole just needs to get home from Nigeria to make good on his debts and marry her. Then, Annette is sure she's being deceived by a man who claims to be a contractor in Africa, but that doesn't stop her from sending him money. Have these women really fallen in love or just fallen for an international scam? Share your own online dating stories and talk about the show here.

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September 23, 2006, 1:58 pm CDT

RED FLAG ALERT

I got several emails from Nigeria too and was smart enough to delete them. Any time someone you barely know or just met whether it be in person or on the internet, asks you for money, this is a sign  people!  There is something terribly wrong here.............

Run, do not walk away from this person before they suck you in any further!  And do not send them money!  They will just continue to ask for more!  I don't know about you but I work hard for my money and would never give it away to someone I don't know no matter how heart wrenching the sob story!  Think about it..............how many others is he trying this with?  Women should never be that desperate to meet a man.  I would rather be alone than be used like that.

You can meet enough losers right here.............and do it for free!

 

 
September 23, 2006, 3:40 pm CDT

BE SUPER-CAUTIOUS!!

 I receive these emails from time to time just out of the blue from these people in Nigeria needing money to get out. I delete them immediately.
I don't even belong to match.com!! I'm not sure how these people got my email address. Anyways, DO NOT SEND MONEY to these people. They contacted my mom, through snail mail because she doesn't have a computer, asking HER to deposit money into this bogus account and that her rewards would be tenfold. She called the cops about it and they told her to throw the letter away. IT WAS A SCAM.
 
September 23, 2006, 5:11 pm CDT

love scams

There are scams abound. You should never fall for these scams. If they are real they will meet you  half way. Not take your money in hopes. Love is not bought. There are scams for selling motorcycles on ebay where you accept a certified check for way too much, cash it and send the balance back to the sender. Only to find the certifed check you accepted was bogus. OR a second chance to purchase the motorcycle just send overnight money and the shipping will be for free. Only they never owned the motorcycle in the first place so you just lost the money. Your dear departed long lost reletive in nigera had millions on depost when he died and all you got to do is pay up front thousands of dollars for this and that to get the money. Yea right. So never send money to people you do not know very well. Actually never send money. If you even know them well they are usually only using you for the money. Count the money gone when you send it. And nothing, I repeat NOTHING, will ever transpire in your favor for that money.

Larry Colin

 
September 23, 2006, 6:36 pm CDT

love scams

I was e-mailed by a man who claimed to live in Kansas, had one daughter. and mentioned that his mother, father, and wife died in a car accident and all he had left in this world was his daughter. we chatted for a few months and then he said he was going to africa for the first time for his job. asked if he could call and I said yes, when I heard his voice I knew something was not right, time went by and then I knew what was coming, he and his daughter was in a cab heading to the store and he did not realize  the cab driver was a robber, he was robbed and his daughter was shot and he needed money so the hospital could treat his daughter. I told him to directly to hell and to never e-mail me again.

and they all have the same story, my wife, mother and father have died in a car accident, do not fall for this, it is a scam.

 
September 23, 2006, 8:45 pm CDT

This just happened to me

I just have to laugh. When I read this topic, Dr. Phil was describing what happened to me to a T.  "Mathew Johnson" said he was from Wisconsin.  Good looking picture and nice profile. (on Mysapce.com)  We started chatting and almost at once he started calling me dear.  Then it went to My love.  Well he also typed like he was Yoda.  Alot of really bad grammar with words turned around.  A construction worker from Wisconsin stuck in Africa on business and need to have cash to get home.  Well I knew it was a scam right away.  So I prodded him a little.  What about family helping, etc.  Then I said asked what type of work he did and he said oil drilling.  I said in Wisconsin? And, I could have fallen off my chair,  he said yes!!!  We have alot of things in Wisconsin, but no oil fields.  I told him buzz me when he got back to Wisconsin, and he got all huffy and said no.  I feel for people that fall for this.  They play on the fact that if you are looking online and are of middle age, that we are easy targets.  I have been thru enough to not trust anyone, so I didn't fall for it. 

Please, all of you out there, be careful.  There are pleanty of Real people to be friends with.  I won't chat with another guy again.  I have had enough.  My daughters said try and find someone, I say, I will stick with my family and cats!!

God Bless!

 
September 24, 2006, 4:52 am CDT

I had to laugh too when I read this....

 would be on the show this week.  I have been contacted many times.  It is actually become a game to me.  The conversations in IM usually start simple enough(even with the awful use of the English language) but within a few minutes it goes to baby, sweetheart, etc. That is when I go on alert since this person does not know me well enough to call me that.  I have a paralegal background so by now I am just laughing to myself as I wait for them to ask for something or tell me they cannot get home, to please send them some money, on and on and on.  I usually tell them that if 1 of my daughters called from Nigeria and needed to come home, I still would send no money.  I would get on a plane and go get their butt and bring them home and dare them to go to such a place again-----this usually really messes with their mind and they take a few days to think of a new strategy to use on me.  It is just a game to me---I AM NOT sending anyone any dollars, period!   ---let them get a job there in Nigeria............I guess it is a bit of meaness in me as I want them to work and work and work some more at trying to persuade me to send them some money, only to finally find out that "it ain't happenin', not in this lifetime!"

The reason they keep doing it is, at least occasionally good natured or desperately lonely people fall for it and give them huge bucks for their efforts.  I hope lots of people watch this show.
 
September 24, 2006, 6:18 am CDT

one of many

    As I read  these messages, I realize, that there are many smart women here. Yes there are men, unscrupulous . I was  contacted by  3 of these so-called lovers,  on singlesnet. There are some good ones there, don't worry.  Just a funny, but one, as  he was attempting to con me, I mentioned that I had a family friend, that worked for the government,  and knew international law that could maybe help him out. I could give my friend his contact info, and see what he  could do for him. my "friend" worked for the FBI, surprisingly he didn't bother me again!
 
September 24, 2006, 6:33 am CDT

Nigeria is a Huge Scam

After reading some of the postings, I thought I would add my experience.  I met someone on SingleParentMeet.com.  We chatted within the site and then chatted through Yahoo.  To make a long story short, I was scammed.  He told me that he was an only child and that he ex-wife cheated on him and that he had custody of his son who would not talk with his mom because of the affair.  He was "orginally" from Texas but had gone to Africa to work.  We chatted a lot and then one day he asked for money.  My gut said something was wrong. 

 

I did send $200 and was suppose to receive a "cheque" from his friend who owed him money.  The "cheque" ended up being postal money orders.  I took them to the post office and was told that they were very good fakes.  I reported the incident to the police, postal master, attorney general, Western Union and the US State's Attorney.  Please note that if you cash those money orders you could face legal action.  DO NOT DO IT!  I didn't cash them but I know a person who did and her lawyer is trying to help her out the situation.

 

After I called him on the money orders, I got the story that the police had been at his hotel the night before and almost put him in jail because of his friend.  He went on further to say that his friend was jealous of our relationship.  I explained that we had no relationship because we had never seen each other.  Yes, I was stupid to send the money but I will never send any more. 

 

He said he needed my help for he and his son to return to the US.  I said no but he said he had receive a "cheque" from his boss and was sending it to me.  I said no but he did anyway.  When that check arrived it was CVS Pharmacy money orders.  I was sure they were fake but went to the bank for some help.  The banker verified that they were fake in fact she said that they had been cashed for small amounts.  These money orders were for $450 each.  If you look them over you are able to tell that they are fake.  There are precautions to verify authenticity.  I called him on them as well.  He denied it.  He then accused me of taking his money and running. 

 

Then he said he had $80,000,000 US dollars but that there was a legal issue preventing him from receiving it and that he needed $8000 for an attorney.  I told him no way and to stop scamming me.  I removed him from my address book and I just received an offline message from him yesterday.  It was been two months since I stopped communicating with him.  Communicate but investigate.  I googled his name and could not find him.  I looked up the town he said he was from and then asked questions about where he had lived.  The best thing was that I had gone to Tennesee for a trip and all of the sudden he was going to move back to the US to TN.  I asked which city and his answer was TN.  Ask lots of questions.  Don't take anything as truth and if you meet, meet in a public place and tell your family and friends what you are doing. 

 

I felt very stupid when I realized that I had been scammed.  I trust people and am honest but I forgot that not everyone is like that.  I had just given myself permission to start dating and now I believe being alone is safer.  I just hope I didn't put myself and my children in danger because I wanted to find someone new to love. 

 

 
September 24, 2006, 6:50 am CDT

FBI report on these kinds of scams

Quote From: zumachda

I just have to laugh. When I read this topic, Dr. Phil was describing what happened to me to a T.  "Mathew Johnson" said he was from Wisconsin.  Good looking picture and nice profile. (on Mysapce.com)  We started chatting and almost at once he started calling me dear.  Then it went to My love.  Well he also typed like he was Yoda.  Alot of really bad grammar with words turned around.  A construction worker from Wisconsin stuck in Africa on business and need to have cash to get home.  Well I knew it was a scam right away.  So I prodded him a little.  What about family helping, etc.  Then I said asked what type of work he did and he said oil drilling.  I said in Wisconsin? And, I could have fallen off my chair,  he said yes!!!  We have alot of things in Wisconsin, but no oil fields.  I told him buzz me when he got back to Wisconsin, and he got all huffy and said no.  I feel for people that fall for this.  They play on the fact that if you are looking online and are of middle age, that we are easy targets.  I have been thru enough to not trust anyone, so I didn't fall for it. 

Please, all of you out there, be careful.  There are pleanty of Real people to be friends with.  I won't chat with another guy again.  I have had enough.  My daughters said try and find someone, I say, I will stick with my family and cats!!

God Bless!

Your advice was very upbeat yet very true.

 

I joined Match.com a month ago. I am a senior, pretty, still working and just felt it would be nice to meet a nice man to share fun times.  Well, after a succession of men who decided they were too conservative for this proud Democrat, I get a letter from a man who said he was in the UK. His photo was movie star gorgeous. His profile had no interests, no requirements for his date except that she be from the United States and said " If you are the kind of woman who is not trusting, I am not the man for you. " AND he demanded that I immediately write him,not through Match, but his private email -- a free Yahoo account. His email raised the hairs on the back of my neck.

 

As a former journalist, his message said two things to me. He was either a terrorist trying to gain help in entering our country without suspician or a scam artist lining me up for taking my money.

I immediately reported him to match.com who threw him off their system. Then I called the local FBI and their representative said this: (PLEASE LISTEN LADIES AND GENTLEMEN) "They want your money. Every day we get people calling us, crying because they have been taken for money that is from $5,000 to $50,000! They say, But I know his address and I saw his picture and I've talked to him. He's even talked to my children." And the agent said, "And I say to them. No, you don't know these things. Pictures and addresses are not real. You know nothing about this man (or woman, but it's mostly men preying on middle aged and older women)."

 

I then did what the man said and wrote his Yahoo address asking a few questions. His only replies were "Do you like being single?; How long have you been single? He never answered any of my questions. Although he said he was a widower, he didn't reply to my question: How long have you been a widow? Real widowers are delighted to talk about their dead spouses if the marriage was a good one leaving good memories!

I finally wrote this to him: "Listen, I am very good at how I make my money (writing). You are really lousy at how you make yours, buddy." That was the last time I heard from him.

 

Don't settle for your cats. Join a church that has single events or a singles club. Volunteer in a hospital -- lots of men there. Volunteer in a food bank. Men who  volunteer have good hearts. So do men who volunteer in animal rescue groups or SPCAs and Humane Societies.

Yes, these methods always introduced me to nice men. I've just moved and thought I would cut corners but now I've given up my Match.com waste of time and am taking my own advice.

 

My dog is wonderful and affectionate but I deserve him -- and  more. We all do. Have a great Sunday. Lane

 
September 24, 2006, 7:05 am CDT

report these men to their webmasters

Quote From: ali1672

 How do they get our emails. All of these men from Nigeria. All they ask for is money and how we can get them here to the US. Do they think we are such losers that we would be stupid to do that. they even harras my children. Asking for sex and money. How do we stop them?
In order to stop these men, report them to their dating sites if they are using one. I got  a con artists kicked off Match.com (Then I resigned myself). These sites make their money by keeping their sites desirable to their members but they do not monitor members unless they get an email from another member. Help eliminate their avenues of "victim-digging". The FBI will say "too bad" but these scams are too prevalent for law enforcement to use their resources to nail them and prosecute. Be proactive.
 
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