Topic : True Love

I am all set to be married in one week to a man that I have been with for 7 years.  I am in my mid thirties.  He is a good, good man - everyone loves him - there are no issues of abuse, addictions, he is better at housework than me, and is very respectful. But we lack passion, and always have, and I have always felt in the back of my mind that I was 'settling', even though I didn't want to admit it.  About 1 month ago I started to feel panic at the idea of marriage.  It 'coincided' at a time when I had the opportunity to get to know someone I've always 'admired' from afar - and there was definate chemistry.  Through a group activity with mutual friends, we spent an evening laughing and goofing around and having a TON of fun together.   I had more fun with him that evening, and felt more of a connection with him than I have EVER felt with my fiance.  He finally asked if I was 'okay' and said I didn't seem like a bride about to get married - at which point our discussion turned to the obvious mutual attraction between us.   I walked around in a daze for a week or so until I finally talked to my fiance about the fact I was having 2nd thoughts about the wedding and nerves.  I didn't mention the attraction to someone else as I think in a lot of ways it is kind of irrelevant and would just be hurtful right now.  He suggested we go and see a local pastor to talk and we did, and I went to a couple of counselling sessions to try and sort through normal 'pre-wedding' nerves and serious doubt.  I have always felt in our relationship that I have 'pushed' things along (self esteem) and that he was never really in-love with me but that we have grown to a point of loving each other very much.    I feel like we are 'comfortable' and 'content' but that I have 'given myself away' somewhat in this relationship, and I felt with this new 'attraction' that I was finding myself again.  I guess its the age-old dilemma - to commit to marriage with a good, comfortable, man who will always treat me right, but lacking in passion and spark and excitement, or to pursue love with what feels like a soulmate.     We have spoken about postponing the wedding - not breaking up but postponing until we feel like we can talk all of this through and then decide if we are going to get married that we'll both do it knowing it's the best thing ever. - but I know he doesn't want to postpone- that he would be embarrassed as friends and family are travelling to the event.    

But I guess it comes down to this question: Should I take that walk down the aisle, and pledge our lives to each other before God, with all the doubts and fears as they are right now,  knowing that these issues aren't going to go away on their own and  thinking that 'well, we'll just keep working through this stuff and find out if the marriage will work or not?' .....or should we postpone - as painful and embarrassing that will be for everyone with such short notice - and make sure that when we do take that walk down the aisle that we are as sure as any couple can be when they pledge their love to one another.   

I am running out of time to make this decision - I wont leave him at the alter, so need to make a decision now!!  Any one been through the same thing as me??  Advice?? 

I'm 28 years old, met my love 10 years ago and still loving him....

We got married after 10 months from our love story start

No one can imagine how much I love this person, 

I can feel of him if he is ill, sad or outside the country without even hearing a word from him...

He's business man, travailing most of the time...

Until now I have problem when he leave or disappear because of work, even if it's one hour in the day

My problem is that 'he is my first priority' but I'm his 'last priority'

I don't know why I love him, and I tried to leave him more that once but I couldn't and I got heart attack once because I tried to leave him but I can’t do it

I tried to find another man but when I compare him with anyone I find him the best, no one like him by look , body, mind, heart, sex…. He is the best I’ve ever met

Also I tried to live in another country (7 hours in plain) but he came to me and the time I saw him I through myself on him…

But What To Do? My Love is Killing Me…

I lost my weight since I started loving him (allot I’m so skinny)

I lost my smile because I cannot be with him most of the time

I lost my interest in life; I don’t want to live anymore

How to stop loving someone? Can anyone help?

I tried to make myself busy at work, studding, making researches but I reached point of having pain in my brain, I see him everywhere, and I miss him every moment, at the time he is busy in his work somewhere else in the world

Am I mad?  

I'm 28 years old, met my love 10 years ago and still loving him....

We got married after 10 months from our love story start

No one can imagine how much I love this person, 

I can feel of him if he is ill, sad or outside the country without even hearing a word from him...

He's business man, travailing most of the time...

Until now I have problem when he leave or disappear because of work, even if it's one hour in the day

My problem is that 'he is my first priority' but I'm his 'last priority'

I don't know why I love him, and I tried to leave him more that once but I couldn't and I got heart attack once because I tried to leave him but I can’t do it

I tried to find another man but when I compare him with anyone I find him the best, no one like him by look , body, mind, heart, sex…. He is the best I’ve ever met

Also I tried to live in another country (7 hours in plain) but he came to me and the time I saw him I through myself on him…

But What To Do? My Love is Killing Me…

I lost my weight since I started loving him (allot I’m so skinny)

I lost my smile because I cannot be with him most of the time

I lost my interest in life; I don’t want to live anymore

How to stop loving someone? Can anyone help?

I tried to make myself busy at work, studding, making researches but I reached point of having pain in my brain, I see him everywhere, and I miss him every moment, at the time he is busy in his work somewhere else in the world

Am I mad?  

I am all set to be married in one week to a man that I have been with for 7 years.  I am in my mid thirties.  He is a good, good man - everyone loves him - there are no issues of abuse, addictions, he is better at housework than me, and is very respectful. But we lack passion, and always have, and I have always felt in the back of my mind that I was 'settling', even though I didn't want to admit it.  About 1 month ago I started to feel panic at the idea of marriage.  It 'coincided' at a time when I had the opportunity to get to know someone I've always 'admired' from afar - and there was definate chemistry.  Through a group activity with mutual friends, we spent an evening laughing and goofing around and having a TON of fun together.   I had more fun with him that evening, and felt more of a connection with him than I have EVER felt with my fiance.  He finally asked if I was 'okay' and said I didn't seem like a bride about to get married - at which point our discussion turned to the obvious mutual attraction between us.   I walked around in a daze for a week or so until I finally talked to my fiance about the fact I was having 2nd thoughts about the wedding and nerves.  I didn't mention the attraction to someone else as I think in a lot of ways it is kind of irrelevant and would just be hurtful right now.  He suggested we go and see a local pastor to talk and we did, and I went to a couple of counselling sessions to try and sort through normal 'pre-wedding' nerves and serious doubt.  I have always felt in our relationship that I have 'pushed' things along (self esteem) and that he was never really in-love with me but that we have grown to a point of loving each other very much.    I feel like we are 'comfortable' and 'content' but that I have 'given myself away' somewhat in this relationship, and I felt with this new 'attraction' that I was finding myself again.  I guess its the age-old dilemma - to commit to marriage with a good, comfortable, man who will always treat me right, but lacking in passion and spark and excitement, or to pursue love with what feels like a soulmate.     We have spoken about postponing the wedding - not breaking up but postponing until we feel like we can talk all of this through and then decide if we are going to get married that we'll both do it knowing it's the best thing ever. - but I know he doesn't want to postpone- that he would be embarrassed as friends and family are travelling to the event.    

But I guess it comes down to this question: Should I take that walk down the aisle, and pledge our lives to each other before God, with all the doubts and fears as they are right now,  knowing that these issues aren't going to go away on their own and  thinking that 'well, we'll just keep working through this stuff and find out if the marriage will work or not?' .....or should we postpone - as painful and embarrassing that will be for everyone with such short notice - and make sure that when we do take that walk down the aisle that we are as sure as any couple can be when they pledge their love to one another.   

I am running out of time to make this decision - I wont leave him at the alter, so need to make a decision now!!  Any one been through the same thing as me??  Advice??