Topic : 12/22 Custody Battles Gone Bad

Are you serious? This guy bashes in the head of his son's mother, pleads guilty to killing her. and you don't know why that is an issue? Do you really think that any child would be safe living with a man who is capable of doing that?

And "as for the mother's mom": after killing her daughter, Chris is lucky that the mother of his victim doesn't bash HIS head in with a phone. 

HE PROBABLY PLEADED GUILTY TO MANSLAUGHTER TO AVOID A JURY TRIAL, WHERE HE KNEW HE'D BE FOUND GUILTY OF FIRST DEGREE MURDER AND HAVE TO SPEND DECADES OF HIS  MURDEROUS LIFE IN PRISON.

HE IS NO HERO FOR PLEADING GUILTY TO A LESSER CHARGE TO SAVE HIS OWN MISERABLE HIDE!

THE MOTHER OF HIS VICTIM SHOULD BRING ON A CIVIL CASE AS WELL AS THE CUSTODY CASE.

WHY WOULD YOU SPEAK OUT ON BEHALF OF MURDER AT THE EXPENSE OF THE VICTIM AND HER FAMILY? SHAME ON YOU.

I agree with you. CPS (and DSHS) are not always what they are supposed to be.  Especially if you had 'history', they are biased. A court ordered the temporary custody over to my daughter's father, based only on his alligations.  Until this day I didn't even know that that could be possible.  They didn't even get any statement from me beforehand.  Needless to say that 'we' settled outside the court, because once I came down there his lawyer saw the writing on the wall.

I remember that I cried every day, and I only could speak to my child every other day for five minutes (that's because the father wouldn't let me talk to her longer); and he even recorded our conversations (illegal in his state).  I felt my child was in great distress.  She was so lonely, a playball for some adults.  I had to tell her that everything was alright to stay with grandpa and grandma, even though she wanted to come home so badly.  She cried so much!  It just broke my heart! 

The whole time I was wondering how much more one could take.  I could not imagine if I would have been alone fighting this fight.  Without my husband I wouldn't had been able to pull through as we did. I would have been like a chicken with the head cut off. 

Please, hang in there!  I can rely to you,  and every loving parent would be depressed. And that's the funny part:  if the other parent  or CPS people do know so much and care so much for the kids, how come they do this to the kids?  Unless you are an unfit parent, your kids need you!!! ( I still want my daughter to have contact to her father after all this, but apparently he has other priorities for the time being...)  I like your attitude, and I hope everything will work out for your kids and you.  Good Luck!

Beginning at the age of 13, I started seeing my school psychologist, Susan.  She knew that my father was extremely violent; even threatened her and her family on the phone if she ever called him again.  I could tell her how he would beat up my mom, my brothers and I and she would not report him to Child Welfare; all she cared about is if she was still sexually abusing me.  I told once and he threatened my life if I ever told again.

At 15, I had to turn him in, even though I knew I was putting my 3 older siblings, my maternal grandparents, my mom and I in danger.  It was because his girlfriend stated that she was moving in her son and daughter; one was 11 and the other was 12.  As an immature 15, it was up to me to keep these kids I never met from being beaten or worse.

When I told the school psychologist the first thing she did was call the local police station; I lived in a rural county in NYS to get an order of protection for her and her family.  I was sitting right there.  Remember I was scared to death because my father had homicidal tendencies.  Second she called the NYS child abuse registery, I hung up on her 3 times before she called the prinicipal to come in her office and stop me from doing it again.

I did meet with Child Protective.  I went to a foster home for 3 days and kept running away because I knew I made a mistake.  This was only a few months after my first suicide attempt.  I had to make a painful statement to the police and my mom and sister supported me.  The only reason my mom did was because she was told by Child Welfare that if she didn't she would loose custody immedidately (my parents did not live together.)

A week later my mom and I ran in fear to New Hampshire to be with my older brother.  This was the second time we took off in a rush in two years.  The day he was arrested, my mom and brother decided to go back home.  I was scared to death and called Susan.  She was hysterical on the phone and told me that he threathened to kill 7 members of the family, I was number one on the list.

Needless to say, we went back home, had to hide our car, pull down all the blinds in the trailer and barracade the door.  My mom's parents lived next door and my grandfather had severe heart problems.  They told my mom, "Why didn't you tell us, we would have protected you and the kids?"  When you live with severe violence, which would get worse when he drank you said nothing, for fear that he would take one of his guns and kill you.

He was out of jail in 24 hours.  We were scared to death!!!!  The county workers would call everyday to make sure we were still alive.  I would tell them that my mom was on her way to a heartattack and we were both scared that he would kill the family.  They would hang up and call the next day.  This went on for 2 weeks. 

I could not go to school because of the fear he would see me get off the bus and shoot me; Dr. Phil my fear was justified.  One day when the county called I told them if they did not get me out of the trailer I would run away and kill myself.  So, instead of ending up in a place that would help me and protect me, I ended up living in a Children's Home with physically and mentally abusive sisters.  The motto was, "Forgive and foget."  I was court ordered there and put on a PINS before I was 16. 

In June of 1984, at the age of 17, I was reunited with my mom.  My alcohol and drug use spiraled, I overdosed again, and quit high school 2 times in a few months.  After my drug dealer threathened my life, I ended up in an adolescent state psychiatric unit, then transfered to a girl's home which was the safest place I lived in my life.  I was only there for 5 months because I was almost 18 and wanted a high school diploma.

I was then put into the public mental health system, were I spent 16 months on an adult state psychiatric unit, I was 18.  I was labled as borderline and did not get out until I turned 20.  I should not have been there that long.  I endured more physical abuse and mental abuse by the staff; restraints used when I was having flashbacks, or self abusive.  At this point I was not diagnosed with PTSD.  At 25, I got away from the public system and sought private counseling. 

I was still living in a mental health apartment program and soon after got a wonderful casemanager. 

At 39, I have major depression (recurrent), which I believe I have had even before I was first diagnosed at 15.  I have Chronic PTSD, an eating disorder, a dissociative disorder, and have over three years sober. 

I have made great progress over the past few years, but I am on SSD and can only work 20 hours a week.  This could have been avoided if, THE SYSTEM WORKED FOR ME.  My mom was diagnosed with heart problems shortly after I left home.  I did that to protect her, because I was his main target, but I full of guilt because she could have died.  Sadly, my mom passed away from cancer in 1998, after battling for 2 years, she was 59.  My father is now in Florida and is 69, he has NO GUILT for what he did to my family.

I am grateful for the mom I had because in the early 80's there were no shelters.  The police would not respond to calls even when there was an order of protection unless he was at the door.  They were 15 minutes away and by that time, we would have been murdered.

I don't have a lot of old memories and deal with fear all the time, but I have made it and am contiuning to move forward.  I have a loving partner, Scott, who has been in my life for 13.5 years, close friends, my siblings and am an aunt 7 times over.  I can not have children, which I feel is the cause of all the abuse I endured, who knows.

Please let America know that so many children are NOT BEING PROTECTED by county workers and/or the police.  The placements that they end up in are sometimes deplorable, worse than living with abusive parents, living with the sisters is a good example.

I love your show and I agree with you on so many things, but these types of occurrances are happening today in my city of Albany, and all over the country.