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Topic : 10/05 Attack in the Night

Number of Replies: 53
New Messages This Week: 0
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Created on : Friday, September 29, 2006, 09:48:42 am
Author : DrPhilBoard1
On a quiet night in mid-May in beautiful Orange County, California, Greg and Estela Becker were viciously attacked by a man with a hatchet as they slept in their bed. Despite sustaining head and neck wounds from their attacker, they were able to push him out of the room, and Greg ran for help. Their attacker escaped, and police are still working to locate him. In the meantime, an entire community struggles to find peace in what once was a safe neighborhood. Greg and Estela's twin 9-year-old daughters saw their parents covered in blood, adding to the trauma of this event. Their next-door neighbors, Anne-Marie and Billy Linas, were shocked by what they saw when Greg ran to their house for help. Dr. Phil meets with this community to discuss how they can move forward and feel secure again. Talk about the show here.

Find out what happened on the show.

More October 2006 Show Boards.

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October 6, 2006, 1:39 pm CDT

the real boogie man

I was so moved by this couple!! The someone under the bed or the boogie man in the closet, these people had it actually happend to them.Dr Phil you are so kind and have such a great family. God bless you.  Kevin Boston ma.
 
October 6, 2006, 2:01 pm CDT

if you only new

Quote From: shockedx100

I am absolutely amazed that you can make such harsh judgments about people you don't even know.  Maybe it makes you feel safer to think that it wasn't a random incident, but it does not help the family AT ALL to put the blame on them. You are right in that you don't know all the facts and shame on you for even suggesting that the wife is lying. I think you are the one in deep need of therapy.

 

Some facts that might make you a little less judgmental of the wife....the kids were not left alone. They were in a locked room with their grandmother. There were NO doors unlocked. The intruder broke the glass door in the back yard. There are many more facts that did not get on the show, but the Dr. Phil show is not an investigation show. That's not what this show was about.

 

I hope the next time you think about judging someone you don't know, you'll take breath and realize you can't make judgments without knowing all the facts.

 

If any of the Dr. Phil staff reads these messages, maybe you can add something to one of you shows about the affect of these negative messages. Maybe you can even get this negative writer on your show so she can get some help.

                     ifit happen to you you would not say this women is lying it happen to me rape how do you no that the man was trying to get the husband out of the way and wanted to rape her you are so mean by saying she new him i new who rape me and guess what he got away with it so don't go judgmental on the wife you don't no all the facts so when you do you can write another letter  the cops let the man go who rape me the cops did not care so if your a cop you are no better then the cops here where i live arkansas
 
October 6, 2006, 2:03 pm CDT

10/05 Attack in the Night

Quote From: answer_seeker

I was wondering whether or not to post my thoughts on this incident, since everyone seemed to be willing to overlook what I thought were some pretty significant discrepancies.  After reading a little more and seeing there were some others who also had doubts, I decided to take a chance.

 

First of all, I agree - there are definitely some things about this story that don't add up:

 

- the intruder knew his way around the house (this was stated by the husband).

 

-if my children were in the house under these circumstances, regardless of the danger to myself,  I would fight through hell and back to make sure they were safe.  I would not shut myself in the bedroom while some lunatic was loose in my house and leave my children at his mercy.

 

-it's interesting also that the intruder broke into a neighbors house to steel the weapon he wanted to use.    It pretty much seems like this individual knows the neighborhood - he might even live there himself.

 

-the husband sustained the most serious injuries and, (amazingly)), when he went out the window to get help, the intruder decided to leave.

 

-when the husband left to get help, instead of running to check on their children, the wife is yelling out the window?  Her daughter was awakened by her screams.  I don't know, but if it were me, again, my first priority would be to get to my children.

 

It's interesting that the private investigator was leaning toward a gang initiation or just a random incident and neither one makes sense, especially if you go back to what the husband stated about the intruder seeming to know his way around the house.  If the attack were random, that would certainly not be the case.  If it were a gang initiation, for someone to have known where to go and get the tool and then get around inside the house without any problem, would have taken some serious planning.  Do they go to that much trouble for gang initiations?  I really don't know,  I'm just asking.

 

There is definitely more to this than meets the eye.

I completely agree about feeling something was either not right with the story, or that something was being overlooked, which has prompted me to post when I normally do not.

 

First of all, I must admit with others {preparing for slam} that the thought continually crossed my mind about why, as a parent, you would push someone out of your room and closer to your children. I would have died trying to bar him from getting anywhere near my precious kids.

 

Secondly, I admit that I probably watch too much CSI, Criminal Minds, etc., but my personal first thought was that the attacker had lived in that particular home before. I thought the house was laid out rather oddly and the attacker knew EXACTLY how to go around the house, which door, and to break though a glass door and around to the master bedroom. Following the camera tracking the attacker's route, I kept thinking, "I would NEVER have known how to get through the twists and turns of that house layout".

 

THEORY: The attacker had lived there as a previous owner with his wife and children -- his "happy family" in their "happy home". He had been friends with the neighbor from whom he took the weapon (knew what tools were there, having been in the garage there with this friend/neighbor  before -- otherwise, why not grab a weapon at a closer neighbor's home/bring a weapon with you, etc.). His wife ended the marriage (possibly because of his anger/abuse/mental problems) and was granted a divorce he vehemently did not want. He felt his "happy family/happy home" was ripped from him and now, there is this "happy family/happy home" where HIS should have been.

 

Lastly {preparing for another slam}, it kept nagging at me that, of the two parents that were attacked, the wife acted as though she were the one most brutalized/traumatized by the incident when I never heard (or just missed) of her sustaining any injuries of any kind. If someone should be traumatized, etc., it should be the husband who was brutalized and, very literally, almost lost his own life and continues to take medication every single day to avoid seizures from his injuries and only reminding him of the incident. With her sustaining no injuries, who knows if she would have been harmed at all? The husband said that he just instictively lunged over her to protect her -- no one said she was about to receive the blows and not him. I just found myself being angry that she apparently just stood there in her room screaming at the window while her husband, already severely bleeding and brutalized, is the one that goes to get help and a murderer possibly heads to her childrens' room. I would have fought like a wildcat to protect my husband and my children. It just seems as though she did NOTHING and yet claims to be the most traumatized and most in need of comfort and help. Her husband PROVED to her what a great protector of her family he can be -- HE's the one that has the right to worry if he'd ever have to protect his family in such a way again.

 

I'm just saying ....

 
October 6, 2006, 2:11 pm CDT

they did not care

Quote From: tab0519

Let's start with Congress.
       and it is to late now it is in gods hands i praded that but i also said to god that it is in my hands to and god kelp him away from this town for 8 years but if he comes to this town and i see him it is in my hands i call gov. i called every one i couldthe papers the t.v. ypu name it i did it but it was all the same there is nothing they could do  so that was the day i prayed for the frist time in a long time
 
October 6, 2006, 2:16 pm CDT

10/05 Attack in the Night

Quote From: preraph

So sorry for what you went through.  I had two episodes when someone broke in when I was gone and stole all my underwear and, same thing, I went and stayed with my parents and in hotels.  I tried to stay there, but I'd still be awake at 5 a.m.  However, in the intervening years, I've learned to feel more secure by booby-trapping (see my other post), putting dowels in the windows, leaving lights on, and having dogs.  I sleep better now than I have my whole life.  I think Dr. Phil's thinking is that, you know, these people are now aware that they can be victimized NO MATTER WHERE THEY ARE.  It's a sad fact.  So they may as well learn to cope with their house.  Realistically, they're just as safe there as anywhere, especially now with the neighbors on alert.  Also, even if PTS keeps them from being able to stay there, PTS will follow you wherever you go.  I do believe getting back on the horse at least once will lessen its longterm effects some.  The redecorating idea is a good one.  It's like cleansing the house.  Going back in is demystifying it.  Otherwise it will always be a haunted place you visit in your mind.  It is a hard road.  I hope something they can do going forward will make them feel at ease, and hope the same for you as well.  It does change you forever, there is no doubt. 
so sorry i wasrape to 8 years ago
 
October 6, 2006, 3:52 pm CDT

Too much TV

Quote From: snellas

I completely agree about feeling something was either not right with the story, or that something was being overlooked, which has prompted me to post when I normally do not.

 

First of all, I must admit with others preparing for slam that the thought continually crossed my mind about why, as a parent, you would push someone out of your room and closer to your children. I would have died trying to bar him from getting anywhere near my precious kids.

 

Secondly, I admit that I probably watch too much CSI, Criminal Minds, etc., but my personal first thought was that the attacker had lived in that particular home before. I thought the house was laid out rather oddly and the attacker knew EXACTLY how to go around the house, which door, and to break though a glass door and around to the master bedroom. Following the camera tracking the attacker's route, I kept thinking, "I would NEVER have known how to get through the twists and turns of that house layout".

 

THEORY: The attacker had lived there as a previous owner with his wife and children -- his "happy family" in their "happy home". He had been friends with the neighbor from whom he took the weapon (knew what tools were there, having been in the garage there with this friend/neighbor  before -- otherwise, why not grab a weapon at a closer neighbor's home/bring a weapon with you, etc.). His wife ended the marriage (possibly because of his anger/abuse/mental problems) and was granted a divorce he vehemently did not want. He felt his "happy family/happy home" was ripped from him and now, there is this "happy family/happy home" where HIS should have been.

 

Lastly preparing for another slam, it kept nagging at me that, of the two parents that were attacked, the wife acted as though she were the one most brutalized/traumatized by the incident when I never heard (or just missed) of her sustaining any injuries of any kind. If someone should be traumatized, etc., it should be the husband who was brutalized and, very literally, almost lost his own life and continues to take medication every single day to avoid seizures from his injuries and only reminding him of the incident. With her sustaining no injuries, who knows if she would have been harmed at all? The husband said that he just instictively lunged over her to protect her -- no one said she was about to receive the blows and not him. I just found myself being angry that she apparently just stood there in her room screaming at the window while her husband, already severely bleeding and brutalized, is the one that goes to get help and a murderer possibly heads to her childrens' room. I would have fought like a wildcat to protect my husband and my children. It just seems as though she did NOTHING and yet claims to be the most traumatized and most in need of comfort and help. Her husband PROVED to her what a great protector of her family he can be -- HE's the one that has the right to worry if he'd ever have to protect his family in such a way again.

 

I'm just saying ....

You are right - you do watch too much tv. Apparently you don't pay attention to what you watch though or you would have heard them explain how she fought the intruder off of her husband. Most women probably would have stood there and screamed. If it wasn't for her fighting him off he would have never survived. Dying trying isn't going to save your family either. What good would that do?

 

How do you know what you would have done. It has never happened to you.

 

 

 
October 6, 2006, 5:15 pm CDT

10/05 Attack in the Night

Quote From: survivortoo

 

 

My attacker broke into my home while I was out returning a video to a Blockbuster store.  Prior to breaking into my home, he broke into the next door neighbors home (who were away) and stole a knife from their home.  He disguised himself with gauze and wrapped his head like a mummy.

He raped me and only after I cried out; "Why are you doing this to me" did he stop and tell me to

lock myself in the bathroom and wait 5 minutes before coming out.  Thankfully he left my home; unfortunately the police work was sloppy and they never caught my attacker. This happened to me 17 years ago (I actually had to stop and count which is a good sign).  This crime changed  my life forever. Thankfully, I received excellent help by participating in a Federally funded research program which offered various types of therapy to determine which type best helped a rape survivor.  I was in the control group which received both types of therapy ; It was not easy, I had to expose myself to being in situations that brought my fear level so high at times I thought for sure I would die, but I made it through and actually the Cognitive Behavioral Therapy which I received has helped me in overcoming other hardships in my life. During the investigation,  the Police said on a number of occasions "regardless of what you do to your home; if someone wants to break in bad enough they will."  Although that may be true, what does help is making sure that you know your neighbors,installing  outside lighting around your home and entry ways, keep shrubbery low, make sure that your deadbolt locks are installed so that the deadbolt is drilled  at least 2 inches into the wood, alarm your house and use your alarm, even if you are going out for 5 minutes ( I was gone for only 10 minutes when my home was broken into).  Don't assume that your dog is going to save or prevent you from being attacked.  Dogs can be given treats or worse they can be slain before you know about it.  Be aware of your surroundings at all times.  Educate yourself on how to not be a victim; but if you happen to become victimized remember that if you survive; regardless of how you survive; you did what it took to stay alive and that above all else is what matters. You lived to tell about it!!!! Lastly, do not let any crime or other life altering event ruin your life; GET PROFESSIONAL HELP TO GET THROUGH THE EVENT!!!!!

God Bless. 

I'm so sorry you went through that awful thing.  You really are doing well if you haven't thought about how many years ago it was in awhile!  I've had a few break-ins over my lifetime.  Twice they simply broke out a window.  Once the guy kicked the door AND the frame completely out.  I had two big deadbolts on it that locked from the inside and outside.  He just knocked the whole thing out of the frame.  Anyone who knows anything about construction can do this to doors or windows.  There really is no way to fully protect yourself, but it prevents some crimes if you just make it more difficult for the person.  What you said about dogs is true.  By no means should you expect them to be able to save you.  They are just irreplaceable for early warning and as a deterrent to most criminals, but they guy who knocked my door in also maced my poor old dog.  I was so grateful to him that he didn't let her out the front door into the busy street.  Isn't that awful?  That was all I cared about at the time.  He was a junkie who chose my house probably because it was on a corner.  He was seen in the act, and eventually caught.  My most terrifying one was the guy who turned my house absolutely upsidedown twice and took all my underwear.  The second time, he took the rifle I'd gotten and cut the phone cord.  he turned out to be young and was caught eventually, with barrels of underwear, but I didn't know what I was dealing with.   I was terrified, and if I knew then what I know now, I would have been more terrified.  Back then, the police really thought those type guys were harmless.  Now, profiling has proven that those are the kind who can be very dangerous as they develop. 

 

It's heartening to me to hear that there is a good program out there for victims.  I am always recommending different sites to people when I'm on crime boards and victims show up, but I don't know how much help is really out there and how hard it is to get.  So I'm very glad to hear your story.  Even though I've not had anything nearly as horrid happen to me as you have, I know how these invasions change you forever.  I really envy those people who can't fathom the fear me and greater survivors have lived with.  It's what we all aspire to, isn't it, that we can't even fathom that sort of evil, that sort of fear.  But at the same time, I find those people frustrating, because it seems at times they are the most lenient and forgiving on violent criminals, because they're idealistic and because they simply can't imagine the harm it does a person, forever. 

 

May you live the rest of your life in peace.

 
October 6, 2006, 6:13 pm CDT

this show was so creepy

I only watched 15 minutes.  how terrible that humans act worse than animals.  I really give credit to the Dad of the family.  If he didn't take off screaming for the police @ his neighbor's door his family could have easily been murdered.  I can't imagine having a deep head and chest wound from a hatchet and then running outside and falling to the ground landing on your head.   I only wonder how nice it would have been for the couple to have had a gun in their dresser drawer.   he could have shot the gunman dead.
 
October 6, 2006, 7:16 pm CDT

more details?

Quote From: snellas

I completely agree about feeling something was either not right with the story, or that something was being overlooked, which has prompted me to post when I normally do not.

 

First of all, I must admit with others preparing for slam that the thought continually crossed my mind about why, as a parent, you would push someone out of your room and closer to your children. I would have died trying to bar him from getting anywhere near my precious kids.

 

Secondly, I admit that I probably watch too much CSI, Criminal Minds, etc., but my personal first thought was that the attacker had lived in that particular home before. I thought the house was laid out rather oddly and the attacker knew EXACTLY how to go around the house, which door, and to break though a glass door and around to the master bedroom. Following the camera tracking the attacker's route, I kept thinking, "I would NEVER have known how to get through the twists and turns of that house layout".

 

THEORY: The attacker had lived there as a previous owner with his wife and children -- his "happy family" in their "happy home". He had been friends with the neighbor from whom he took the weapon (knew what tools were there, having been in the garage there with this friend/neighbor  before -- otherwise, why not grab a weapon at a closer neighbor's home/bring a weapon with you, etc.). His wife ended the marriage (possibly because of his anger/abuse/mental problems) and was granted a divorce he vehemently did not want. He felt his "happy family/happy home" was ripped from him and now, there is this "happy family/happy home" where HIS should have been.

 

Lastly preparing for another slam, it kept nagging at me that, of the two parents that were attacked, the wife acted as though she were the one most brutalized/traumatized by the incident when I never heard (or just missed) of her sustaining any injuries of any kind. If someone should be traumatized, etc., it should be the husband who was brutalized and, very literally, almost lost his own life and continues to take medication every single day to avoid seizures from his injuries and only reminding him of the incident. With her sustaining no injuries, who knows if she would have been harmed at all? The husband said that he just instictively lunged over her to protect her -- no one said she was about to receive the blows and not him. I just found myself being angry that she apparently just stood there in her room screaming at the window while her husband, already severely bleeding and brutalized, is the one that goes to get help and a murderer possibly heads to her childrens' room. I would have fought like a wildcat to protect my husband and my children. It just seems as though she did NOTHING and yet claims to be the most traumatized and most in need of comfort and help. Her husband PROVED to her what a great protector of her family he can be -- HE's the one that has the right to worry if he'd ever have to protect his family in such a way again.

 

I'm just saying ....

Perhaps Dr Phil could provide more details about the injuries? Was the wife injured? If so how? I had heard threw the news that both were in ICU- true????

Regardless, if my husband was attacked, while I was next to him, in our own bed- you better believe I'd be traumatized!!!! My husband is so laid back, he'd get over this sort of thing much sooner than I would. Women always hold on to things longer than men.


Too bad these people turned to Dr Phil for help and now they're being attacked, once again, through these message boards!

Obviously, the entire story can't be told in less than an hour! Don't judge a book by it's cover...

 
October 6, 2006, 7:22 pm CDT

10/05 Attack in the Night

Quote From: chanelee

First I would like to say that it is a terrible thing that happened and I do feel for the family. However  I am also a mother of 2 children, and I could not get over the fact that they had pushed this man out of the room "closer" to the kids. If they had the strength to push him out of the room they should have been able to get him down and take the weapon.  I cant imagine the the childrens room did not have a window, why not brake through the window from the outside and get them out before going to the neighbors house to call for help.  I also thought it was very strange that the neighbor wwas VERY calm.  It is great if you can remain calm under pressure, but your good friend/neighbor is frantic and covered in blood screaming...and the neighbor has NO emotion in his voice?
Keep in mind that this show is EDITED!!! They do not show all of the interviews- they show what they think makes for good TV. No emotion??? Did you not hear the neighbor talking about his children? How he feared that the intruder would get into the children's room & harm them? Did you not see the beautiful baby at the end of the show???
 
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