Topic : Breaking Up

Hi all,

My ex common law husband for 4 years and me had a 6 yrs. old daughter.  During those time of separation, we were off and on until last time was December 2004.  He had dated here and there and had a girlfriend in 2004 but only lasts 5 months.  He introduced our daughter to this girl only once.  After that girl, he dated another one that only lasts 3 months.  He came back to me and got back together again but only lasts for not even 2 weeks.  After a month he started seeing a new girl and already started exposing our daughter to her.  They are still together and both been spending time with my daughter sometime every other weekend when my daughter is with him. I overheard on his voice mail messages that this girl is already saying I love you to him.  I know it is not illegal for him to expose my daughter to her..but it's making me really angry.  I wanted to know this girl so I know who my daughter is spending time with when she is with her dad but he would not introduce her to me.  He already introduce her to her family but not to me.  Am I entitled to know or for him to introduce to me to his girlfriend or is this out of my business? 

I am a  female who was engaged to male. We were together for a total of 8 months. He cheated on me and I broke up with him. We are back together. We were apart for seven months. He dated other girls and I dated other guys. We are back together. I'm scared that he will hurt me again. What should I do?

Hello everyone-

I have not wrote in over 8 months and now I feel like I may need some support. I did very well with not calling my ex and staying away from him for every reason known to man.

To make a long story short- We met and fell in love- he fell out after 7 months and we stopped being intamite and pretty much went to dating- he said he wanted to take it slow and I put up with a morning phone call and seeing him maybe 1 night a weekend. I finally had enough and just walked away from him. He didn't call me and I didn't call him. It still makes me sick to think that I wasted almost 2 years being absolutly miserable.

Anyway back to the reason I am writing again.

He called me on Sunday and I have not talked to him in 8 months and I was instantly shaking when I answered the phone. He went on to say that he called my house all through these months but called PRIVATE and asked me how I could just walk away from him. He asked me if we could start dating again and I told him NO.

I have been very strong and now I am not feeling that anymore. I am glad I told him no- BUT I never got any questions answered and there still is no closure.

I was dumb and called him on that next Tuesday ( i left a message) and of course he didn't call me until Wednesday (he left a message I wasn't home until real late that night)  (one thing he was great for) he had an excuse pretty good one but none the less an excuse. I didn't call him back until the next Monday and left a message on his answering machine and guess what it is Tuesday and no returned phone call- I guess I am being punished for waiting 5 days by not calling him back.

I just don't see myself doing all this again. I couldn't sleep last night b/c all I could do was think and that has been a long time since those days have haunted me. I told him it was ok to call me so I put myself right back there and now I just want to tell him that I wish he would not have called and not to call again.

He said that he didn't want to hurt me and he misses me so much and that he had alot of time to think and I have too --I have become a different person but now I feel like I may have told a fib because I feel like I took a thousand steps back from  the healing process.

I feel like I am never going to find what I had with him in the beginning of our relationship. We were great and I am not sure what  changed and after all this time he still can't tell me what happened.

How do I just let him completely go? I know don't answer the phone but we all know that we will. I know I will never call him again. But know I am waiting for him to call back and I feel so stupid all over again that I let him BS me 2 times now. What am I to do? Oh yeah he is 37- never married and his longest relationship was 2 years and I was 1 year and 8 months- so I was the second longest. He has commitment issues and I don't know why I still love him and can't stop thinking if I made a mistake by not seeing him again. I know it took alot to call me but I left him alone why couldn't he do that for me if he really cares?

I have a lot of advice for you but I have a few questions.

What did he go to jail for?

How much was he drinking & doing drugs?

Do you do drugs as well?

Hello everyone-

I have not wrote in over 8 months and now I feel like I may need some support. I did very well with not calling my ex and staying away from him for every reason known to man.

To make a long story short- We met and fell in love- he fell out after 7 months and we stopped being intamite and pretty much went to dating- he said he wanted to take it slow and I put up with a morning phone call and seeing him maybe 1 night a weekend. I finally had enough and just walked away from him. He didn't call me and I didn't call him. It still makes me sick to think that I wasted almost 2 years being absolutly miserable.

Anyway back to the reason I am writing again.

He called me on Sunday and I have not talked to him in 8 months and I was instantly shaking when I answered the phone. He went on to say that he called my house all through these months but called PRIVATE and asked me how I could just walk away from him. He asked me if we could start dating again and I told him NO.

I have been very strong and now I am not feeling that anymore. I am glad I told him no- BUT I never got any questions answered and there still is no closure.

I was dumb and called him on that next Tuesday ( i left a message) and of course he didn't call me until Wednesday (he left a message I wasn't home until real late that night)  (one thing he was great for) he had an excuse pretty good one but none the less an excuse. I didn't call him back until the next Monday and left a message on his answering machine and guess what it is Tuesday and no returned phone call- I guess I am being punished for waiting 5 days by not calling him back.

I just don't see myself doing all this again. I couldn't sleep last night b/c all I could do was think and that has been a long time since those days have haunted me. I told him it was ok to call me so I put myself right back there and now I just want to tell him that I wish he would not have called and not to call again.

He said that he didn't want to hurt me and he misses me so much and that he had alot of time to think and I have too --I have become a different person but now I feel like I may have told a fib because I feel like I took a thousand steps back from  the healing process.

I feel like I am never going to find what I had with him in the beginning of our relationship. We were great and I am not sure what  changed and after all this time he still can't tell me what happened.

How do I just let him completely go? I know don't answer the phone but we all know that we will. I know I will never call him again. But know I am waiting for him to call back and I feel so stupid all over again that I let him BS me 2 times now. What am I to do? Oh yeah he is 37- never married and his longest relationship was 2 years and I was 1 year and 8 months- so I was the second longest. He has commitment issues and I don't know why I still love him and can't stop thinking if I made a mistake by not seeing him again. I know it took alot to call me but I left him alone why couldn't he do that for me if he really cares?

My ex in I broke up in April 2006. I did not talk to him for 7months. He called me private and I wouldn't answer the phone. I knew it was him. Just recently, I called him and left a message on his phone. I called to tell him that I forgive him and to wish him a safe trip to Iraq. He called me back the next day and we have been together since. I can't believe we are together again. He can't believe I took him back. He thought he would never see me again. I thought I would never see him again. Enough about me...

Your ex should have called you back. Maybe he is still upset with you. When he asked you to get back with him, you said NO!. Men don't like rejection. They don't know how to handle rejection. I hope he is not playing games. He is too old for that. He still wants to be with you. Don't call him, he will call you. I know...I didn't call my ex for 7 months. He called me and text me monthly. 2months before I called him, he stopped calling. He said, he had to accept that he lost his one and only love.

Be patient. He will call. You need to figure out what you are going to say when he calls. You will be caught off guard when he call. Try to prepare yourself for his call. If you don't think it will work, then don't waste your time AGAIN. Your TIME is very precious!!!!

Goodluck!