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Topic : 12/29 Drunken Mistakes

Number of Replies: 340
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Created on : Thursday, October 05, 2006, 04:41:03 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 10/10/06) Dottie is concerned for her 22-year-old daughter, Carly, because her drinking is out of control. Carly has already been arrested for driving under the influence, but she still drinks and drives! Dottie fears Carly will end up killing herself or someone else. Carly says she knows she has a problem, but drinking is the only way she can have a good time. Then, Heather and Sierra's brother was killed by a drunk driver, Michael, who also happened to be his friend. Michael received a sentence of five to 11 years, but wants his time reduced. He joins the show via satellite from prison and has a proposal for Dr. Phil. See what Dr. Phil has to say to this offender and talk about the show here.

Find out what happened on the show.

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October 10, 2006, 6:06 pm CDT

Caution about Topiramate (Topamax)

Quote From: jcebme1

You can be alcohol free.  Just start researching the drug Topamax.  It works.  Take it from me,  It saved my life,  and probably someone else's as I used to drink and drive too.

 Topiramate (Topomax) is an anti-seizure medication.  An Rx for alcohol cravings is an off-label use...it has not gained FDA approval for this use.

It's the precise mechanism by which it controls seizures is unknown, but it clearly alters brain signals. It targets several areas in the brain that mediate the  release of dopamine...it decreases the amount of dopamine (the brain's "oooh, I feel so rewarded" chemical) that is released.  Cravings actually involve the release of "teaser" doses of dopamine by the brain,   reminding the body that if they participate in the behaviour, good feelings will result.  Topamax makes the brain shut up about how great a drink would be.

One reason people lose weight on the drug is that it suppresses all urges involving release of dopamine, including eating.

In preliminary studies (larger studies are underway)  it has shown promise as an aid to curb cravings for drugs and alcohol, generally before the person thinks they are really able to give up alcohol,  but they would really like to get the drinking behaviour under control to the point that they can stop.

But mixing alcohol and Topomax is dangerous.
also, Alchoholics may have co-morbidities that make taking Topomax more dangerous and make frequent monitoring of liver and kidney function necessary.

It is NOT a cure-all and sometimes it shouldn't be used at all. 
 
October 10, 2006, 6:08 pm CDT

Drunken mistakes

I am married to a man who drinks 60-90 beers a week. A lite beer of course. And I no longer buy him the beer and wehn I did I felt like I was buying the man the bullet to kill him.  Part of me wonders why I am so upset that he wants out and part of me is depressed . Yup I am an enabler and quite and few other things I am not happy or proud of. I am working on myself and for the life of me I don't know how this happened. I asked the question before we married duh and look at me now. I am a wreck .  I am trying to focus on me and not him and yet boy can we get mad at each other. And I am not a drinker???  He drinks and drives and I feel guilty that someone will pay a price for his addiction. His drinking is going to kill him one day and the kids will be without their Dad. How dare he do that to them ! I can only pray that somehow there is someone that can reach to him but It can't be me as I don't want any impression of improper motives. thank you for the show .
 
October 10, 2006, 6:12 pm CDT

First we must Decide.

Alcoholism is a primary, chronic disease with genetic, psychological, and environmental factors influencing its development and manifestations. This disease is often progressive and fatal. It is characterized by continuous or periodic: impaired control over drinking, preoccupation with the drug alcohol, use of alcohol despite adverse consequences, and distortions in thinking, most notably denial.

 

Disease means an involuntary disability. It represents the sum of abnormal phenomena displayed by a group of individuals. These phenomena are associated with a specific common set of characteristics by which these individuals differ from the norm and which places them at a disadvantage.

 

Primary refers to the nature of alcoholism as a disease entity, in addition to and separate from other path-physiologic states that may be associated with it. Primary suggests that alcoholism, as an addiction, is not a symptom of an underlying disease state. Primary also implies that when this disease coexists with other conditions, therapies applied to them are ineffective until the alcoholism is dealt with.

 

Impaired control means inability to limit alcohol use or consistently limit, on any drinking occasions, the duration of the episode, the quantity consumed, and/or the behavioral consequences of drinking.

 

We have to decide once and for all whether or not alcoholics have a disease or if they are evil. Seems to me if someone is an alcoholic and they are incapable of caring for themselves we should be able to help them, whether they like it or not, and thereby protect society, or we just shoot them. We shouldn't blame people for things beyond their control.

 
October 10, 2006, 6:16 pm CDT

I watched it with my grandpa

Quote From: tallyankee

My beautiful and intelligent sister died of cirrhosis of the liver from drinking alcohol...at the age of 62.  That may sound old to some of you, but it's not.  She started drinking in high school and alcohol controlled her life...    Her last few years of life were filled with unpleasant health problems...ascites....bleeding in the esophagus....falls that led to other injuries...etc... and we her family had to watch her suffering...  It's just NOT worth it to drink...  It causes too much pain for everyone!

My grandpa did the same thing he was 65 when he died. It was something you could not talk about because there were no words to describe watching him dye.  It was a slow painful death. It went from his liver the whole way through his body to his brain when it finally shut everyting down.  That took him 3 years to die.  The last 2 weeks of his life were touch and go.  Everyday we were told he would not live to see the morning. He held in but not for long.  He missed alot of his life let alone of his childrens life, grandchildrens life and even his great grandchildrens life. He has been died now for 16 years. When you watch someone die from that is not easy.  
 
October 10, 2006, 6:30 pm CDT

10/10 Drunken Mistakes

Quote From: compdoc56

Young man I wish you the best in your time in prison I hope & pray you wakeup and see the light. I totally agree with Dr. Phil that he just doesn't get it. I hope someday he will but as I said earlier I lost an aunt and a grandfather due to drunk driving accidents and until he does get it he needs to stay right where he is -- in prison.

 

Young man make use of your time to better yourself, go thru rehab, become remorseful, perhaps read a Bible & go to church service, and then come up a written plan on how to use your experience. If you do this I myself, a small business owner & USAF Gulf War Veteran, WILL help you verbalize a plan of what you want to do.

 

NOTE: When I say something I mean it Im not just saying to type more words!!!

 

God Bless - Thedoc

God Bless You, your plan sounds like a good one. He certainly needs rehab but more importantly he needs God.
 
October 10, 2006, 7:33 pm CDT

6 DUI's

Quote From: taxigirl5

My husband is an alcoholic and drives drunk.  Just last night he came home after having too many beers and drove himself.  I pray that he gets caught before he kills someone else. He  had heart surgery last March and April and still drinks. I believe he has a death wish for both himself and I.  He repeats himself constantly, doesn't remember things, looses his stuff, thinking I put it somewhere (lost his company cell phone hunting just a week ago).  I read Robin's book and I need to read it again.  I'm scared to death I will loose everything if my husband kills someone due to his drinking and driving. The thing I don't get is he has never gotten a DUI in the 13 years we've been together.  Alanon called that  "a functioning drunk"...... I have the upmost respect for folks that can "kick the addicition".  I will continue to pray that my husband will before it's too late.  I will be watching this episode for sure!!!!!

I have a brother who has 6 DUI's and he is still on the road.  I have done what I can to keep him off of the roads.  I know you love your husband but you need to turn him in when he drinks and drives.  If he takes someones life, there is not enough money in the world to make up for that.   He needs help and if he doesn't get it, he will take a life.  I know you don't want to feel responsible for that happening.  Please do something.  Anything.  He will never do it for himself.

 

Rebecca***

 
October 10, 2006, 7:54 pm CDT

Thank you Autumnleaves

Quote From: autumnleaves

It's just not that simple.  Alcoholism is a disease of addiction. When a person is in the grasp of an addiction, it is the addiction that makes the decisions.  I do not condone the bad behaviour of an active alcoholic, but I do understand how and why the bad things happen. 

I am an alcoholic. 13 months ago I entered a Detox program and began attending AA meetings regularly. I've not had any relapses, but only because I forced myself to reach out for the available help when I needed it.   It takes time - often slow and painful progress - but it is possible to get free of alcohol addiction. You can't just "get a life" - an alcoholic has to learn how to live - and it's a lifetime process.

No, it's not fair that some people are alcoholics and some aren't.  It's not fair that some people get cancer and others don't. But it's reality.

I will keep Carly in my prayers. I know what she will go through in the next little while as she withdraws from her physical, emotional and spiritual dependence on alcohol. It's not pleasant, but it's liveable and it's temporary.  And it opens up a whole new life - one of freedom, truth, and peace of mind!

 

I thought your post was 100% right on.  The statement about it not being fair lifted my spirits!  For the longest time I was bitter that my old drinking buddies were still healthy enough to have the lifestyle I used to.  But in truth, now I wouldn't trade my best time drunk for my worst sober day, as I've heard other recovering people say.  But it took a year of sobriety to know that. Congratulations on having the courage to stay sober. It's 3 years now for me. Once I didn't think I'd make it a day.  Or an hour. I think Carly will find it in herself too once she has a chance to experience consistant sobriety.  I don't think people who have never dealt with an addiction or people who don't have enough education about the effects of one can completely comprehend dealing with one.  I wish you and Carly the best.  Take care of yourselves!  And thank you for a well written post!

 
October 10, 2006, 8:00 pm CDT

Michael...

 Michael disgusted me. Talk about trying to deflect the blame and my gosh, after two whole months in jail, this guy thinks he DESERVES to be out in society. Are we sure he STILL ins't under the influence??  He KILLED someone with his irresponsible actions. Dead is forever! I'm sorry if jail isn't too much fun and that he feels he's wasting his time. I'm sure Clint's family would like to have their son/brother/father around 'wasting his time'. There are PLENTY of things to do in jail. What about furthering education? What about actually trying to make a difference somehow?

And was it just me or did Michael show zero remorse??
 
October 10, 2006, 8:02 pm CDT

Alcoholism IS a Disease......

Quote From: bear_ta

Alcoholism is a primary, chronic disease with genetic, psychological, and environmental factors influencing its development and manifestations. This disease is often progressive and fatal. It is characterized by continuous or periodic: impaired control over drinking, preoccupation with the drug alcohol, use of alcohol despite adverse consequences, and distortions in thinking, most notably denial.

 

Disease means an involuntary disability. It represents the sum of abnormal phenomena displayed by a group of individuals. These phenomena are associated with a specific common set of characteristics by which these individuals differ from the norm and which places them at a disadvantage.

 

Primary refers to the nature of alcoholism as a disease entity, in addition to and separate from other path-physiologic states that may be associated with it. Primary suggests that alcoholism, as an addiction, is not a symptom of an underlying disease state. Primary also implies that when this disease coexists with other conditions, therapies applied to them are ineffective until the alcoholism is dealt with.

 

Impaired control means inability to limit alcohol use or consistently limit, on any drinking occasions, the duration of the episode, the quantity consumed, and/or the behavioral consequences of drinking.

 

We have to decide once and for all whether or not alcoholics have a disease or if they are evil. Seems to me if someone is an alcoholic and they are incapable of caring for themselves we should be able to help them, whether they like it or not, and thereby protect society, or we just shoot them. We shouldn't blame people for things beyond their control.

Alcoholism is a disease, period. It is resistant to treatment, in part, due to the most prominent, persistent, presenting symptom: Denial!

Alcoholism has been recognized by the Medical Community as a serious Disease for a Very long time, now. So, the debate is OVER.

 

About treating an Alcoholic AGAINST their will…Be very, very careful what you ask for! I worked in Behavioral Healthcare for almost 30 years. I spent almost all of my career working with the Chemically Dependent. Trust me, you can not-successfully- treat someone who is Chemically Dependent, involuntarily.

In the state I live in, lawmakers got the idea that you ACTUALLY could treat addicts and alcoholics involuntarily back in the late 1980’s. They passed legislation to involuntarily commit people felt to be chemically dependent to in -patient treatment.

It not only DOES NOT work, in this state the state’s largest and once one of the finest treatment facilities went from a very skilled Drug Rehab and safe place to recover, to a NIGHTMARE for everyone. Those who were admitted involuntarily were regarded as ‘patient’s’- as they should be- however, they brought all of their extremely destructive and unlawful behaviors with them! When someone is committed there are NO consequences for these behaviors! In Rehab you CAN NOT have treatment without consequences. Negative consequences are often the ONLY motivations for change! The staff of the facility I spoke of have had to deal with assault, destruction of state property and attempted murder just to name a very few unlawful acts! It’s become quite common place, now. There are no charges EVER! Think about having an enormous facility full of addicts and alcoholics stuck in a place where they aren’t interested in being. It very quickly becomes a dealers haven. It’s now a place to ‘house’ addicts and alcoholics for thirty days. Lawlessness is rampant. What do they now do with an angry addict who has destroyed a unit for drugs and is ready to assault the staff next? Since there can be no arrest or prosecution, the psychiatrists actually drug them to create a safe environment!

Since those staff members skilled in drug rehab quickly recognized, early on, that real treatment was no longer possible, they moved on.

Worse still, since ‘dependence’ is the most pervasive part of this disease, the law has enabled those who are Chemically Dependent to remain so. Now, addicts and alcoholics, who have burned their bridges EVERYWHERE else and have no where else to go, have learned to go to the nearest hospital ER announce their problem adding that they may be a danger to themselves or others and Bingo they re-enter ‘treatment’ for another 30 days. Some people have been through the facility more than 25 times!!! Some are discharged 8:30 AM and are back on the admissions list by afternoon. This law is a killer of the Chemically Dependent. It enables them to the graveyard!

The one thing that really DOES work is what you saw Dr. Phil do today- an intervention!

 
October 10, 2006, 8:04 pm CDT

I agree

Quote From: janlager

I am a Mother of an alcoholic son, and I cannot imagine this Mother having beer etc. in the fridge or even in the house or going to the store with her daughter to buy beer when they are out and also how would any Mother of an alcoholic drink with their son or daughter.  I believe that this Mother should be in treatment again or counseling.  If the Mother doesn't change I don't believe the daughter has a chance after she leaves treament, if she goes back home.
I'm the daughter of an alcoholic and I cannot imagine  enabling my mom. Breaking an addiction is SO hard and support really needs to begin in the home. Thankfully, my mom's been sober for  over twenty-five years, but in deference and respect to her, I refuse to drink anything alcoholic in her presence, not that I'm a big drinker anyway... but you know what I mean? I'd feel that it was disrespectful to her and her struggle.
 
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