Topic : 12/21 One Paycheck Away

There are very few services for married couples that end up on the street.  Often the services require that the couples stay in different locations and this is a problem.  You just lost your house and the only person you can count on is required to stay somewhere else.

In addition many people on the street need mental health services to become stable and get off the street. But because they live on the street they have trouble accessing Medicare, or State care and so they spiral down ending up in trouble with the law multiple times. The police can only arrest them and hold them before they are released only to repeat the cycle.  We have no system for recognizing people in need but just put them back out on the street to repeat behavior and negatively impact our communities.

We are all just one paycheck away from the streets as the middle class is shrinking and the wealthy grow richer. 

read more about people on the street - street-people dot com

Dr. Phil: I’m a true fan of your show. I’ve purchased every book. I try to watch the TV show daily. (Even the repeats)    

However, I’ve never been as disappointed in you as I was on December 21st watching your show. How could you take the side of that “deadbeat mother”? That father had every right not to pay his child support. He has one child with that woman. He is not responsible for all the children in that family. Yet the way the system works….the man that works and pays…is responsible for all the children …even those that aren’t his. Why didn’t you have the father that has been missing from the beginning of the son’s life on the show? Or, the father who is not helping with his unborn child? Yet, you had the man on the show that married the tramp and tried to make a decent woman out of her. You had the man on the show that committed to a relationship with child that wasn’t his. Dr. Phil shame on you for not seeing the big picture of the child support issue and addressing it on your show today.  

To your surprise, I’m a mother. Yes, I’ve been a single mother on public assistance. Yes, now I have a college education. Yes, now I have a good job.  Yes, I’m married and have a child with my husband. My family consists of my child, his child and our child. So, not only do I receive child support. I also watch my husband pay support. Thus, I’d say I’m an expert.  

Your opinion of it being none of the father’s business on how the money is spent is WRONG. He does have the right to know that the money is being spent on the child and not the mother.  In the situation on the show, it was clearly evident that money this father was paying was not simply going to the welfare of his child. You talked down to the father for not being concerned about his child having food to eat. Even if he sent the money he would not know if his child would have food to eat.  Just look at the poor decisions this mother has made. She should be arrested because she is choosing to bring children in the world that she can’t feed!!! That sounds like child abuse to me.  

It is women like the one on your show that cause women and children receiving child support to look like ‘gold diggers’.   I hope that the father is able to get custody of his child. This woman certainly likes fooling around with deadbeat men more than raising her children. She does not deserve the money or THE CHILDREN!!!!!!  

although this man went about it the wrong way i can see why he is frustrated with his exwife and the amount of child support.  i do not condone his not paying, but $900 is a lot of money and i did not hear that stacey had set up any college funds or anything of the like for her son. stacey clearly needs to get her act together and stop having babies by different men.  i have a real problem with lazy people who expect others to take care of them. if a person is really in need due to unfortunate circumstances that's a different thing. myself and my husband work our butts off for the life we have and no one ever handed us anything.  we do make sure every month to give generously to our local food bank. i think it's everyone's responsibility to help those who are in need. Stacey is just lazy.

i don't think he's a bad father. as long as he has positive interaction with his kids and is a good moral leader than he is a good father. good luck with a difficult situation.

sophie

 all I can do is pray for you..and I will!

Best wishes and good luck

We have four children also who are married and have blessed us with eleven adorable grandchildren.  We did our best to give them all they needed and a few extras which was not always easy as I too suffer from panic disorder which started 30 yrs. ago.  So when it got very bad I could not leave the house even to grocery shop.  But my husband whom I love dearly held the fort down and would do the shopping on his day off or after work.  Panic disorder can subside and things can go better and during those times I would get a job but eventually would lose them due to the fact that I couldn't walk into the buildings I was working and just needed to go home where it was safe.  This may sound ridiculous to those that have never had this disease but it is very real and debilitaing.  And as much as I would have wanted my husband to be with me because you are afraid to be alone, he never risked his job to do this.  Fortunately, the panic attacks occur very infrequently now and I have learned to use meditation to help me get through them but know that they could return and have learned to accept that.  The father of those four children living in an RV needs to get out and get a job.  He owes that to his family and his wife has to force herself to let him go.  It will be painfull for her but that is her "job" to help her family.  I am not sure I agree with Dr. Phil on what he gave this family.  I know he did it for the children but educating the Mom and Dad would be much more constructive.  He is being an enabler in my opinion just as the husband is to the wife.  Don't get me wrong.  She has my deepest sympathy and I hope and pray her illness becomes less and less debilitating.  But she must work on it for her children's sake and Dad needs to find a job.  They are out there.

This is a tough one.  As far as I am concerned, that woman who is pregnant and clearly unable to provide support for herself and her children needs HELP, to see that she is indeed responsible for the situation she is currently in.  At the same time, the guy "Pete" is a joke, and his comments prove how very much he does NOT care about the well-being of his child.  I agree it's a tough one, but both of these people put themselves and their own needs first, without any regard for those poor kids.  I feel I can talk, too.  I am the eldest of four girls, whose Mother is mentally ill and a drug addict.  In the mid-seventies, our parents divorced (our mom divorced our dad) and our father couldn't get custody of us.  He fought the system for years.  He worked hard and had a good job.  He knew that there was drug use and dealing, major kegger parties, and a host of other unmentionable activities in the home where we lived with our Mom, and he still paid his child support, all the while continuing to fight for custody.  Finally, in 1977, the court awarded him custody of us girls.   Our Dad went through HELL for us kids.  Period.  He never complained about his responsibility, even when his child support was so high he was forced to live with our Grandma, since he couldn't pay support and pay rent at the time.   Still, he put OUR needs above his own.   

Even after being forced to go bankrupt, he worked through it, eventually making full restitution and rebuilding his own life admirably.  Obviously, our father is our HERO.  It wasn't easy for him, when he got custody none of us wanted to leave our mother, who we were very protective of.   But, he didn't give up on us, not once.  He taught us that the needs of our own children must take priority,  and he showed us this by EXAMPLE, in spite of a system that made it very hard for him to do what was right. 

Why is that so hard for people to figure out these days??