Topic : 12/21 One Paycheck Away

     Life might not be made to be easy, but what is wrong with a man giving an offering from the heart. and who are you to be saying how Dr. Phil chooses to use his finances or resources?He told them that they were going to have to acomplish goals and make on with their lives.  You didn't listen closley enough, he was starting the fishing lessons.  He was more concerned about placing the children in a stable environment then getting the parents on the up and up, to what they can do, not to what you think they should do.  I get mad too because there are alot of people do want a free ride, but don't lose heart for Dr. Phil, it seems Robin keeps his head on straight in the morning, and I heard "it's not for free" so ya sound like a good kid, kick back, take a deep breathe, and we can start telling some fishing stories.  Did ya hear about the one that got away?,,,,,,,,

     Ten years ago my boys were 5 & 6 as we lived in Vancouver Wa.  My husband, boys and I went to the city park for lunch and to play, then to explore the downtown area since we were new to the area.  

     There was a large number (20+) of men that appeared to be the homeless men, that my husband stated lived near the river and the railroad depot a couple of blocks away.  Some of them had harmonicas out, they were playing music and looking like they were having a nice time.  They mostly had dirty looking long hair, most had layered clothes because the layers were thin and old. 

    Our 6 y/o asked if we could take our food over to them and let them eat.  Both my husband and I told him after we had lunch.  Just as I was laying out the food three of the men came walking over to the table and asked that if we had any left overs if we wouldn't mind letting them having it.  I said that it would be fine, that it may be just a while because the boys were still playing.  My husband came over and asked if I was okay and I laughed and told him of the conversation. 

     After we ate, my husband and boys took everything we had left over to them.  They were so surprised.  They had only expected a couple of slices of bread and meat, but even though some were drinking and other things, they were enjoying each others company on a warm spring day and it just felt good to share, even though we did not have much at the time. 

     They asked if the boys and my husband could stay for a bit, I saw my 5 & 6 y/o dancing, some of the men were tapping their toes to the beat.  These were  men that if my husband saw get on a train, he would have to call ahead to the next stop to get them off. 

     So to answer your question in a long winded way, yes, I have been asked for money, though no one in this group did.  And I agree with you in offering to buy the food instead of giving them the money,  but this was the most memorable because we were able to teach our boys how to give with dignity and with maintaining the takers dignity, for you never know if the next time if you will be the giver or the taker.  They also learned they can rejoice with people that may not share the same life style, culture, and age.  Isn't it wonderful what a little food and dance can do?

Dr. Phil, I do too seldom disagree with you, but these folks that you referred to as being 'homeless' is not my interpretation of that. They did have a roof over their head and a bed to sleep on. It was obvious the kids had been coaxed as to what to say and act. These people were looking for a big handout and they knew you would give it to them. Anyone in their right mind knew they were probably getting food stamps and that man could have gotten some kind of temp work while the kids were in school. Absolutely NO EXCUSE. And this woman has stress and anxiety and that keeps her from working. I had it for years and worked. I had a bi polar husband (actually crazy) a retarded son with seizures, 2 other kids demanding my attention and I worked. Now my retarded son has passed away, my husband is on meds, my other 2 children don't communicate with me because I had to give my retarded son so much of my attention (??). Now, my husband and I live in a little cheap house where we did without gas last winter because we didn't have money for propane, heated our water on the electric cookstove to bathe and wash dishes. I have had 2 back surgeries. You know the minor kind where they put screws, bars, cages and metal plates in you. Take morphine to help with the pain. But, by george, I'm doing it by myself (along with my husband of 44 years that is wonderful now that he is on medications), just like I raised my retarded son. for 31 years. I didn't ask the government to raise him and I didn't go on a show with a great man with a heart as big as Texas and tell my sob story. I noticed all these children seemed to be healthy as did the father. I just have a few words for you Dr. Phil. First of all. I love you. And: YOU ARE TOO GENEROUS FOR YOUR OWN GOOD.

On the October 11 show, the second couple made me so angry I saw red. As a person who works with people who are homeless because of unforseen circumstances, these types of people are the ones who take services away from those who truly need them and cause difficulty in getting people to donate time or money to our ministry. That man did not quit his job to take care of his wife. He quit his job because he didn't want to work. He was looking for a way to get other people (in this case Dr. Phil) to take care of his responsibilities with no effort on his part. The wife had an 'anxiety disorder'? Puleeze! The people who come to us for help have that and worse, plus often a mountain of medical bills that caused their situation in the first place. 

 

Those children should be yanked away from these immature freeloaders and placed in foster care until the parents learn some responsibility.

   I too, have been homeless because of  a situation beyond our control. A new landlord bought the rental we'd lived in for 6 years and, long story short, told us when our old lease was up( in  5 weeks) we'd have to pay $300 more a month. Not only that he handed us a packet with a new lease (25 pages long) that had truly assinine stuff in it,such as, no hanging laundry out- on our line.Also, no washing our car( with water (we paid for) I loved the last clause- the landlord reserves the right to raise the rent within the first 30 days if he feels it necesssary. Yeah right!

  I wasn't signing that. So, then began our journey. We'd bought an old trailer , on rented land. The pipes froze, the furnace broke mid-winter. Our "landlords" were true rednecks, anyway, they decided not to pay their bills and the land went up for a sherrrif's sale.

  Anyway, we ended up in the homeless shelter for five months. We were blessed to both have jobs but, it took us that long to find a home because of the desperate shortage of afffordable housing in my area. We'd call about a house or apt. and go on a list of at least  50 people.  It was incredably frustrating to know you  are doing everything you can and getting passed by.

 We did get a house last Feb. We offered 1st. last, and 3 months in advance to sweeten the deal. I'd volunteered at a local drop -in shelter previously, but you get a whole new perspective when it's you that's homeless, or house hunting, or between houses-both sound a lot better than homeless.

  People shouldn't be so quick to judge. It could be them next. All it takes is an accident, illness or some other unfortunate event and you're left scrambling.

   Oh, in case you're wondering, we'd been led to believe our new "landlord" (who'd bought our old house) wasn't going to change any of the terms. We heard that all through the sale- 'cause we'd been such good tenants etc.

 

The intent of the post was not to elicit humor, but rather to point out that child-support laws - in some states - encourage opportunistic women to engage in fraud. Fraud is at best unsavory behavior, in some cases criminal behavior. It is only recently that some states are accepting DNA tests in cases in court, for example, in order to substantiate paternity. In those states, there has been an enormous amount of fraud by women discovered in court, to wit, marry one man because he shows outstanding earning potential. Such a man is excellent child-support fodder. The women then chooses to have a child with another man, divorce her husband, and collect child-support from the bigger wage earner, now her ex-husband.

Certainly, the children are the most important thing. However, support of the children should be the responsibility of the biological father, the one who did not keep it in his pants, at least as far as that child was concerned. Even though he did not keep it in his pants, and was involved in an illicit relationship with a married woman, he still deserves to have an accounting of where the money goes.

In cases such as described above, the services of a professional made no difference ten years ago in states where there was no recourse, and no equal protection, for men in child-support cases.

I agree. WAKE UP AND SMELL THE COFFEE DR. PHIL. They are mooching off of you because they know if they bring crying children to the show you will help. If you go back next year they will be in the exact same situation. You can't get pregnant three times by mistake or five times like the RV family.

I have worked since 1994 with panic and anxiety disorder because I am a single mom and I had no choice. I am from a third world country and have experienced "real" poverty first hand. That RV would be a luxury home only millionaires could afford in my country. If these spoiled, lazy, bay popping, welfare collecting, pot smoking people want to see how well off they are send them on a visit to a third world country.

every thing dr phil has done wasnt for the adults as much as it was for the children of those adults, would you get pleasure from seeing a child do without? would you continue to kick your fellow man or woman while they were down, ? orwould you reach out to them and offer a helping hand to get back on there feet? i have read and seen where soooo many people find dr phil as being wrong with his decisions as to who to help and as how to help, and i must say sa long as hes helping with his money far be it to me to say weather hes right or wrong, but just for the reacords i feel he has done the wright thing helping keep a roof over the first guests childrens head and i feel 100% sure he did the wright thing helping the family with 4 children get a roof over there head and food in there bellies, dont the children deserve a chance? sooo many people have lost sight as to what life is all about,