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Topic : Love Being Single

Number of Replies: 393
New Messages This Week: 0
Last Reply On:
Created on : Friday, July 01, 2005, 05:07:56 pm
Author : dataimport
Are you single and loving it? Share your story with other happy singles!

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August 6, 2007, 9:30 am CDT

BREAK-UP

Hi. I am 50 years old and have been living with a man my same age for one year. We met, fell deeply in love and moved in together four months after meeting. We have joint bank accounts and such but my house is in my name. He recently told me he wanted to leave saying he just could not figure out why he wasn't feeling like he should. Well he changed his mind and stayed. Now just a mere four months later he states again he is leaving, moving to another state and just feels he is missing something. He has a lot of issues with his children who live on the east coast, and issues with his ex-wife who is overbearing and his mother who is judgemental. I feel so sick about this. I felt we were so connected and shared a lof of the same interests and now he just can't seem to say why he is leaving other than he needs to find out who he is. Any opinions?

 
August 24, 2007, 4:29 pm CDT

19 in a relationship but still desiring to be single

Well, I am 19 years old I am now trying to have a boyfriend, i likehim a lot, he cares about me, he actually tells me he loves me and I don't know how I feel and it is coming between us.  I mean I do want to be with him but I still have urges to do my own thing, I haven't given in to those urges, but I can't control them.  I mean I did tell him I loved him twice before, once when I was drunk, and once when we were crying and having an emotional talk, and at those times it is what I felt.  Well, my past is like this,  when I was 14, I had a boyfriend who cared about me a lot, and still to this day he wants to be with me but I was new to the whole dating thing and told him I wasn't ready for love and moved on.  My second boyfriend, lied, cheated, and all the above.  The third one was just like the first, too much love too fast.  Then the fourth one, I never trusted him but cared about him, spent a lot of time with him, and come to find out, he hwas cheating on his girlfriend for me. Then after that I was single and that was two years ago, now I want love and I don't know how to feel it. HELP PLEASE

 
September 11, 2007, 4:42 am CDT

SO TRUE!

Quote From: i_c_all

Why is it women aren't supposed to love being single? I'm a 33-year old professional, who has recently bought her very own apartment, and I feel great. Sure, I sometimes miss having a companion (and a lover), but I still find it OK to be alone. If only my friends would see it that way!

  

 

In less than one year, one friend met and moved in with her boyfriend, another friend met her girlfriend, and yet another met a guy and got married. So I am now the odd (wo)man out. My newly-converted married friend feels obligated to whisk me out of my miserable state, so it seems; she insisted on fixing me up with various guys, but alas: a. I wasn't really up to it at the time, and, more importantly, b. Not one of those theoretically great fix-ups ever came to be (she always somehow decided that, after all, the guy wasn’t really for me). So I admit that I was, and still am, confused. On one hand, it seems that this concerned friend has only the best intentions in mind, but I can't shake off the nagging feeling that she didn't really want for me to meet someone - she only wanted to feel like a good friend.

  

 

My younger sister, who got married last year, also tried to fix me up. I appreciate the effort - I really do. But it still feels like all my friends and relatives regard my single status as a disease I must overcome or a terrible predicament I must get out of.

  

 

When I tell my friends that I don't really want to meet someone right now, they shrug. My best friend, who has known me since childhood, claims I'm scared. Maybe I am. I admit that my last blind dated have left me hurt and angry. Still, it's not only fear. Deep inside, I feel the desperate need for breathing room. I want to enjoy my new apartment, and continue looking for a new job (which I have been doing ever since I got my current job - it's just not for me).

  

 

Anyway, I hope I'll feel the urge to date one of these days. Until then, I will continue to meet my friends, do the things I love, and just embrace life.

  

 

 

  

 

  

I have been single going on 3.5 yrs now, (twice divorced, never wanted to marry in the first place really, it was the man's idea both times)-and not doing it ever again I might add. I have dated here and there but nothing serious. I think some of it is fear of getting hurt, but I really do enjoy being alone and with my friends, ( I am with them alot )and atleast 2 of them are single as well and "say" they have no intention on changing that. The 3rd is stuck in a miserable marraige and stays only because she believes there is nothing better out there. Although she knows she has us to rely on and being sad all the time isn't working for her either. Anyway,  just wanted to say thats why I love the sex in the city episodes, it is so me and my friends and in ways celebrates being single. I love my life ( I don't have children but do have pets that I adore), and I love my friends and I don't really want that to change, nor do I necessarily want to give up my time alone or let a man into the picture. The last guy I went out with just couldn't "believe" that I don't really date or care to, like all women must want/need a guy, he learned quickly that wasn't the case but not before he went (without my knowledge) up to a girlfriend of mine and said "she really doesn't date?" To which she replied, "nope, she gets asked out alot but just doesn't care to."  I have seen too many friends (male and female and actually the men are worse), jump into one relationship after another, I try to tell them to just give being alone or with friends a chance but they don't listen, or they say they will and don't follow through.  Then, gee big surprise what they jump into falls apart! Hey, I have total control of the remote, all of the bed, and whether I leave the dishes in the sink for a day or two or not, and I don't have to put up with the farting, burping or toilet seats up! I am a huge NFL fan so sports was never an issue but man! I don't miss that other stuff! So singles, hold your heads high and enjoy!!!

 
September 11, 2007, 4:48 am CDT

get rid of him

Quote From: lissybell

Hi. I am 50 years old and have been living with a man my same age for one year. We met, fell deeply in love and moved in together four months after meeting. We have joint bank accounts and such but my house is in my name. He recently told me he wanted to leave saying he just could not figure out why he wasn't feeling like he should. Well he changed his mind and stayed. Now just a mere four months later he states again he is leaving, moving to another state and just feels he is missing something. He has a lot of issues with his children who live on the east coast, and issues with his ex-wife who is overbearing and his mother who is judgemental. I feel so sick about this. I felt we were so connected and shared a lof of the same interests and now he just can't seem to say why he is leaving other than he needs to find out who he is. Any opinions?

Stop letting him yo-yo you and your feelings, excuse me...find who he is?  Tell him well he's not going to do it being with you and good luck with that, AND to get the heck out.  Any man that is doing that is just looking for excuses to move on, to most likely someone else. No I am not a  man hater, but I am an attractive, 37 yo twice divorced woman, who no longer puts up with this crap of well maybe he just needs time, he's just confused or why is he doing this? Me and my friends found ourselves saying those things.. I personally am still good friends with my ex's, and no 3rd party was involved, but I have been happily single, (dating here and there) and have seen and experienced all of these tricks. I have good friends and like my life, and you should too, you do not need a man to complete it, even Dr. Phil says that and says you must believe that to live life to the fullest!
 
October 12, 2007, 6:25 am CDT

single? yes.... loving it? not so much...

I want to be married.... or at least be one half of a great whole relationship with the right person. I don't mind being single... I don't want to be alone... there's a difference... I have many blessings. I have two college age kids who are doing well, own my own home, have a decent job and I am not yet 40! BUT..... I didn't imagine myself single at this point in my life... I'd envisioned all the things "we" would do, when the kids were grown and gone... the weekend getaways, the changes to the house, etc.,... all the things that parents with adult children get to share and experience and rekindle... none of that happened.... now... am I saying I wish WE'D stayed married? Not necessarily.... I was miserable with my ex.... intimacy was gone a LONG TIME ago... and just a general detachment on his part... so I was alone a lot of the time anyway... but even if he wasn't the one.... that doesn't mean that I am destined to be alone, right? I want to share in someone else's life... share those intimate moments that come from trusting and familiarity and caring with someone... and... this might sound nuts... because most who know me, perceive me as a fiercely independent, strong, capable woman... I am all those things... but I would LOVE, LOVE, LOVE to meet a man who was stronger than me... that I could trust when he says "it will be okay".. a "soft place to fall" as Dr. Phil says... someone who, if I were in a moment of crumbling weakness, would hold onto me and reassure me that HE would take care of me for that moment... not control me... but comfort me and reassure me... I do not attract that kind of fellow... because of my strong, independent personality... being in charge of so many areas of my life... and that kind of strong personality, tends to repel a stronger man... why is that? I don't need a man to financially support me.. I have my own money... I don't want a man that I have to take care of either.. worked too hard to get out of my marriage with my money intact... but I would like to share myself with someone... the right one.... in the meantime, I will continue to enjoy my children and their successes, my career, my home, my friends and family.... all as a single woman... who enjoys her blessings but still longs to share with a good partner....

 
November 9, 2007, 6:04 am CST

Love Being Single

Quote From: bsmith77

Like the old saying goes..."Better off alone than being miserable."

 

I think it sounds like youre still bitter though. I experienced the same thing after moving out of my abusive father's house when I was 20. I had never dated, thought all men were like him- and it took me 5 years to finally start dating! Although Im now happy with my fiancee of 2 years, I had to have faith in myself back then to realize there IS someone for everyone, and when you're least looking for it- true love will come into your life. Just be confident with who you are for now.

 

Dont give up entirely. That's when you sell yourself short....everybody deserves the man of their dreams! I had to wait a quarter of a century to even find him!! Theres hope for everyone and I know thatt now.

 

God bless...

Bonnie

I love it when I see people say things like you did in your message title.

 

Single life is so empowering!

 

It makes for a healthy and happy life and if one should ever find themselves in a relationship, having had this great attitude when they were single, it will make for great success in the future. JMO

 

Chris

 
November 21, 2007, 5:10 pm CST

Love Being Single

This really is a dead board.
 
November 24, 2007, 4:28 pm CST

i agree!

Quote From: upalnight

This really is a dead board.
found any better ones?
 
November 25, 2007, 12:05 pm CST

single is best

 I can gladly say I am very happily single and plan on keeping it that way

for the rest of my life. ''Men'' are tooooooo much work and wayyyyyyy too

stressful to handle. I've delt with way too much in my life. And I so hate sex.

I'd rather marry myself then ever marry any kind of arrogent jerk who thinks

hes got to have sex 24/7/365 days of the yr. Yea, I dont think so. And half

these stupid guys who call themselves ''men'' dont even know half the

meaning of what a true man really is. Cause all these guys on your show

ether wanna be a bunch of ''mamas boys'', abusers of all kinds, cheat,

or whatever they can do to have as much sex or control as possible,

so they can be the ''man'' in the relationship or whatever they wanna call it.

They all make me sick. And this is why I stay single. I hate most guys because

of who they are and thinking they can get away with all they can before they

get caught. I have no kids ether. Thank god!!!!!!!! They may be good for some

people but not for all. Ive been raped, molested, abused, hit, ect.

They all make me sick and another thing I cant handle hugs anymore.

Most guys all they like to do when they hug is hump ya. Eeewwwwwwwww!!!! 

I havent talked to this guy after the crap he tried on me. I hate everything abt

the whole male population (good or bad). I know, sad, but its exactly how I feel.

 

-Whatever-

 
December 13, 2007, 9:23 am CST

Loving IT

I love being Single....After never being alone my entire life. I went straight from my parents to living with my boyfriend, who I eventually married and was married to for 13years. I finally dont have to answer to anyone. Ok except my children but you get the picture. I can buy what I want when I want to and go out or stay in if I am in one of those moods with out some one b*tchn at me for not being social. When i go out I can act anyway I want because there is no one telling me stop or getting mad because I was talking to a guy that I know or just being friendly. Those are just a few things I love about being single.

 
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