Topic : 12/28 What Would Robin Do?

Dear Robin,

Thanks for reading my post.  I have reinvented myself after having had a string of bad relationships.  From having managed leaving an alcoholic husband to also leaving my second relationship after he had an affair.  I am tirelessly working on my third.  As all human beings he is not perfect.  We have kinks to iron out.  He is a straight laced guy, professional, does not drink or smoke.  In layman's terms he is quitye the "nerd" and I adore that.

 WE seem to plug away quite peacefully, except for one issue an ex-girlfriend who is hanging around and he
seems to allow this.  She owes him tons of money and according to him that is the reason
he is in contact with her.  She resides in British Columbia.  Prior to her moving out there, she asked that they move in together in order to help her pay the bills and move on to British Columbia to move in with a guy she met on the internet.  He is also storing her belongings.   I was already in the picture and he agreed to her request. 

He still, I believe once in a while helped her with money.  This was 3 years ago.  Two years in a row she has returned to visit here with her relatives and he goes and picks her up in the airport.  Last year I let it go and did not say anything, but this year she is visiting again and yes he is picking her up. 

I finally said something and we talked about it calmly, but he does not understand why this makes me uncomfortable.  It is not about trust, I suppose it is my insecurity.  I am by no means
trying to control him.  Is it unfair to ask him to let her go because of what she owes him or is there another reason why he is holding on.  He insist that it is the money.

Robin, what would you do?

Ok, fine, hurt feelings. People have control over their emotions...she could just shrug it off. She CHOSE to have hurt feelings about this. I think sometimes people with no problems try to make problems for themselves...some odd human condition...pessimism might have been an evolutionary advantage at some point...LOL

BTW...sorry for somethings I said to you in the past....really. :o)

No worries. I have a thick skin. It pretty much takes a brick in the face to offend me. The net is notorious for misunderstandings. It is impossible to see body language, or hear the subtle nuances of speech.

My husband and I have been married for 25 years.  We don't hold grudges...hence the long marriage. 

 

This lady definitely has deeper issues that she just doesn't want to see...the cake is easier to be mad about than dealing with the real and current issues.  I think she should get counseling to get to the heart of the matter...counseling by herself at first, then marriage counseling to establish better communication.  Grudges are so stressful and unnecessary...much better to nip it in the bud and work it out before it gets so big.

 

 

Dr. Phil and Robin...why have you never done a show about people who have their stuff together.  It might be helpful for people to see how others have successfully worked through their problems...I'm not saying that we don't have our share of problems...quite the contrary...but we don't dwell on the problem...a solution, coping strategies, communication...just a few ways to reduce the stress and work through a problem.

 

Why not do a show on success stories and what really works, instead of just asking, "How is that working for you?"  I haven't seen a lot of strategies for problem resolution on your show...a lot of focusing on the problem...not enough focus on a solution...it would be more helpful and more of a service to your viewers to focus on suggestions for what will work. 

 

I've seen the follow-up stories on past guests, but why not get some new blood on the show?  People who have good coping skills could be very helpful and inspirational to those who need help in that department.

 

 

Those kinds of shows don't get the ratings that horror stories do.

 

 

I saw this episode of Dr. Phil and this was my favorite story.  I could not believe everything that I saw.  Sherri was definitely a people pleaser who just let people walk all over her.  When her girlfriend called her to go shopping she said yes, but she did not really want to go, she would let her manicuriest gouge her nails to the point of infection, just lay in pain when she was in the hospital, and much more.

 

 

Another big shocker came when she was eating lunch with her daughter and they did the experiment on her.  She never speaks up when given bad tasting lemonade, the wrong sandwhich, and is treated poorly by the waiter.  But then Robin whom she greatly admires delivers the lunch she wanted.

 

 

At the end of the show Sherri learns to stand up for herself.

I need to talk to Robin.

I watched DR Phil Show today , Re: Ask Robin" and i cried as I watched each woman show their new appearence, they were beautiful and their families must be so happy. ( I wish I was one of those ladies}

I seen DR Phil asking people to join the "weight loss challenge", I wish I could be one.

My question is this. I am a 66 year old female who thinks young, wants to be young and would love to look younger.I also need to lose weight in a BIG way but I had back surgery and limited to what I can do as far as exercising.

I also live in Canada and I am a very proud Canadian but we don't have any programs on television like yours DR Phil. I can hear you saying now, you don't need to be on a show to lose weight or look young, but you know what? I do need that, I need to listen to you yell at me and say "do or die".

DR Phil, could and would you and Robin come to Canada so I can get your help PLEASE.

If you email me I will tell you what city is closest to me if you would come here.

Robin, you are so attractive for your age and you to DR Phil , I like bald heads.....sometimes...lol