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Topic : 10/19 Teacher Caught in the Act

Number of Replies: 418
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Created on : Thursday, October 12, 2006, 06:04:35 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Remember when you were in school and had a harmless crush on your favorite teacher? Today, there are frequent headlines of teachers who are turning these schoolboy fantasies into sexual realities. When 24-year-old Janelle lost her virginity to a 15-year-old student, she says she "wasn't thinking about the law," and she was "in love." Now, she's a convicted sex offender who faces up to 30 years in prison. Janelle's attorney says she was treated unfairly. What does Dr. Phil think? Then meet Owen, the ex-husband of teacher Debra Lafave. Debra made international headlines when she was caught having sex with a 14-year-old student and her attorney suggested she was "too pretty to go to jail." Owen has since divorced Debra, remarried and written a book about being in the center of a media blitz. And, 15-year-old Jason says he had a love affair with his 26-year-old gym teacher, although she denies it, and he says he still has feelings for her. Jason's mom says that he was preyed upon, and she fears he will never recover from it. Talk about the show here.

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October 13, 2006, 6:47 am CDT

LOLLLLLLLLLL

Too pretty to go to jail??????????????????get over it!!!!!!! you do the crime, you molest, rape, prey upon a child, you belong behind bars!!!!!!!!!! I don't care who you are and whAt you look like, goes to show that looks  can be deceiving, this attorney needs to get real or get out of the business.
 
October 13, 2006, 11:34 am CDT

10/19 Teacher Caught in the Act

I believe that some women are too pretty to go to jail, but what they did was against the law. If a male teacher were to rape a young girl, would he be getting any sympathy? NO WAY! Look at Mary Kay Letourneau, for instance. She had an affair with a 12 year old kid! And now, she has two children with him. And who takes care of them? His mom. And she lost her career, & her family (& I'm pretty sure that she's trying to reconcile with them right about now). Now what are they doing? Struggling to take care of their children, him dropping out of high school, & getting in more trouble with the law! She could've avoided all of this if she were to say "No" to him. She felt that she didn't love Steve anymore, & she could've avoided jail time, but she choose lust over her family & her career. All I gotta say to the women who are teachers is this: WHY would you choose to risk losing your career & your family (if you have any children) over some kid who's probably not going to do any better or function out in the real world? How is he gonna take care of you & support you & your children (if you have any together)? Working at McDonald's? If you somehow feel that your marriage is falling apart, or if you don't love your husband anymore, then get out of it, but don't go lusting after a kid, it's not worth it! I pray that all of you who are like this would get some serious therapy & counseling. I feel real sorry for them who are like this way. What made them become this way in the first place? It's sad. Real sad.
 
October 13, 2006, 4:25 pm CDT

10/19 Teacher Caught in the Act

Quote From: manofgoods

I believe that some women are too pretty to go to jail, but what they did was against the law. If a male teacher were to rape a young girl, would he be getting any sympathy? NO WAY! Look at Mary Kay Letourneau, for instance. She had an affair with a 12 year old kid! And now, she has two children with him. And who takes care of them? His mom. And she lost her career, & her family (& I'm pretty sure that she's trying to reconcile with them right about now). Now what are they doing? Struggling to take care of their children, him dropping out of high school, & getting in more trouble with the law! She could've avoided all of this if she were to say "No" to him. She felt that she didn't love Steve anymore, & she could've avoided jail time, but she choose lust over her family & her career. All I gotta say to the women who are teachers is this: WHY would you choose to risk losing your career & your family (if you have any children) over some kid who's probably not going to do any better or function out in the real world? How is he gonna take care of you & support you & your children (if you have any together)? Working at McDonald's? If you somehow feel that your marriage is falling apart, or if you don't love your husband anymore, then get out of it, but don't go lusting after a kid, it's not worth it! I pray that all of you who are like this would get some serious therapy & counseling. I feel real sorry for them who are like this way. What made them become this way in the first place? It's sad. Real sad.
I'm confused...you think that some women are indeed too pretty to go to jail but deserve it anyway? I don't get that.

What do looks have to do with this at all?
 
October 14, 2006, 4:13 am CDT

These women give teachers a bad rep.

It makes me so angry to continuously hear stories about teachers who have relationships with minor students. I am an elementary school teacher and we already do not get the respect of many. More stories about deviant female/male teachers just continue to give teachers a bad reputation. Teachers get blamed when they go on strike demanding for more help in class for students with special needs, teachers get blamed for a student's poor performance in school, teachers get blamed for almost everything.

From the start, we are already not considered professionals  (in Quebec, Canada). I love what I do for a living, but it aggravates me to realize how little respect one can get once he/she is at the front of the class. It's my second year as a teacher and I've already seen the amazing requests from parents. Once those ridiculous requests are not attainable, parents turn into devils, bash you and do everything to make your life a living nightmare.

It makes me so frustrated to hear stories about teachers who have sex with their students or who claim they are in "love" with their students. We, as teachers, act as an authority figure. I don't understand how one can cross over that line and not see that it is wrong. I love my students there is no doubt about that, but there is nothing sexual behind that. I love every single one of my students for who they are. I'd never cross over that line. As teachers, we spend so much time with the students. Of course there are times where I dream of my students, but it is because we spend over 25 hours a week together. They're always on my mind and I always care for them. All this is an appropriate manner. This makes me wonder why every single school board does not conduct a psychological test of their potential candidates. We'd get rid of the deviant ones and we'd protect the children.

I feel sorry for male teachers nowadays. Male teachers don't dare stay alone with a student in fear that students might invent a story to get them into trouble. My male colleagues always leave the door open when they are with their students. They live in fear because of the reputation male teachers have been given. It's very unfair that teachers as a whole suffer the consequences of several deviant individuals.

Don't take me wrong, I love what I do for a living. I wouldn't change a thing in my life. The only thing I wish to change is the system. Scan our teachers properly and have them do psychological testing on teachers!


 
October 14, 2006, 11:54 am CDT

We are missing the point

I understand why the attorney would say that she is too pretty to go to jail because in jail child molesters are on the lowest of the low of the pecking order. Being too pretty is not really the issue, although he made it sound that way.  Because of course he doesn't want to admit out loud that she is a child molester.

 

Now about Debra having sex with a kid, yes that is wrong and yes she is a child molester.   The real damage that has been done has to do with the fact that God has ordained sexual relations to be between a man and a woman that are married.  We are not to have pre-marital sex.  Why? Is God a kill-joy? absolutely not!  He created us and He created sex to bond us together, sex is an intimate act or so it should be and that is why God created it to be shared with someone that we already have a committment to, ie marriage.  And since you can't marry a child lawfully in California Debra already knew she should not have sex with the boy.

 

Debra LaFave took advantage of this child, took something from him that God ordained to be a gift that he would someday give to his wife.  She has taken his innocence and treated him like a sex object.  She was not married to him and she couldn't be married to him because he is a child.  She is no different than any person who has sex with someone outside of marriage, God calls these people adulterers, fornicators and the sexually immoral.  God knows that having sex is a powerful feeling and He knows that if you have sex outside of marriage it can create feelings that you are in love with the person because that is what God designed sex to do.  When Debra had sex with this child it bonded her to him, she no longer saw him as a child, but as someone she was in love with.  All logical reasoning went out the door.  If she had the mindset that I cannot have sexual relations until I am married, then her logical reasoning would have kicked in like:  he's only a child, how will this affect his future relationships with women or his wife to be someday, I have a responsibility to lead him into responsible manhood, to show him what real love is,  to honor him as a person, to respect him, to show him how to have respectful boundaries with a person of the opposite sex.  But she didn't do any of that.  She knew what she was doingwas wrong, but she didn't listen to her conscience and now she is trying to backpeddle and come up with all kinds of ridiculous reasons why she did what she did.  And the worst part is that she has a lawyer defending her and giving her more bogus reasons to justify her actions, shame on both of them!

 

Debra LaFave broke the law and she should be punished for it.  More importanly she has scarred this young man for life, this experience will taint all of his future relationships with women and how he treats women.  She should do jail time just like any convicted child molester and she should be registered as a sex offender.  Should we feel sorry for her, yes, she is very very very lost.  Does God still love her, ABSOLUTELY YES!  Does He love her sin, ABSOLUTELY NOT!.  I pray that Debra LaFave gets the help she needs to understand the seriousness of this sin.  Is there hope for this situation, yes.  God can take any messed up life and turn it around, He can take the worst of the worst and give them real life. 

 

We have laws in this country and God tells us to respect the authority of the land if it does not contradict His word.  Debra LaFave should not be on house arrest she should be in prison!  where all the other child molesters are, she should not get special treatment.  The fact that she is on house arrest is God protecting her, nothing more and nothing less.  Debra LaFave I pray that you will listen to that still small voice in your head (God calls it your conscience) He is speaking to you. Listen to Him. 

 

Lord I am heartbroken about this situation, Lord I want to lift up the young man who is affected by all of this and ask that you heal his heart and mind about being used, he may not see it that way at this point because he himself may not even know you.  But Lord I ask that you use this situation to soften his heart and prepare his heart to come to you and accept you as his Savior.  Lord I ask that you speak to Debra and use this to soften her heart and show her that she needs you and you want to heal her and restore her life to what it should be I ask these things in Jesus name Amen

 

 

 
October 14, 2006, 12:03 pm CDT

I agree

Quote From: jettav

Too pretty to go to jail??????????????????get over it!!!!!!! you do the crime, you molest, rape, prey upon a child, you belong behind bars!!!!!!!!!! I don't care who you are and whAt you look like, goes to show that looks  can be deceiving, this attorney needs to get real or get out of the business.

 

 
October 14, 2006, 7:34 pm CDT

pedophile/double standards

When a female teacher takes advantage of a male student, it's ok?  No way!!!  I must paraphrase Oprah:   even if a 14 year old boy is parading around in front of you naked saying screw me, you are the adult!!!  It's your job to say "put your clothes on boy!!!!".  I am disgusted with any teacher of any sex doing such a thing, but even more so with local folks defending the perpetrator!!!!!  I couldn't care less that Bird was an alleged "virgin" and the 15 year old "pursued" her.  Yeah, right!!  What trash!!!
 
October 15, 2006, 4:56 am CDT

Get over it

People need to get over the idea that this is something new.  It's just like kids going missing or school violence.  We think this is something new because there are 24-hour news stations and we hear about every little thing that happens.

 

When I was in high school there was a chorus teacher who offered my best friend a job as his babysitter.  Trust me, she was taking care of a whole lot more than the needs of his kids.  Then he recruited me into the chorus.  I told him I'd think about it, and next thing I knew, I was getting a notice that my class schedule had been changed and I was in his class.  Fortunately, I was bright enough to see what was going on and quickly had it changed back.

 

Teachers have been preying on their students since the beginning of time, both male and female.  Perhaps women are doing it more because they feel empowered these days .... With the good comes the bad.  Don't kid yourself.  This was going on in YOUR school, too.

 
October 15, 2006, 8:51 am CDT

what about here ?

Hello Dr Phill ,

 

This is Karim From Tangier ( Morocco), Actually what I have read in this article so similar to a lot of same stories in Morocco, the only difference is that the governement here don't have time to speak up about that. I know people here who have an affair with teachers and they get high marks and no one stand up to blame them. al least in US there is one man called Dr phill who jump beyond the lines to do that. here it's still working good with them ( teachers having an affair with innocence student).I hope things change but only God knows when.

 
October 15, 2006, 9:30 am CDT

All Good Thoughts But (for believers only)

Quote From: jojobeaner

I understand why the attorney would say that she is too pretty to go to jail because in jail child molesters are on the lowest of the low of the pecking order. Being too pretty is not really the issue, although he made it sound that way.  Because of course he doesn't want to admit out loud that she is a child molester.

 

Now about Debra having sex with a kid, yes that is wrong and yes she is a child molester.   The real damage that has been done has to do with the fact that God has ordained sexual relations to be between a man and a woman that are married.  We are not to have pre-marital sex.  Why? Is God a kill-joy? absolutely not!  He created us and He created sex to bond us together, sex is an intimate act or so it should be and that is why God created it to be shared with someone that we already have a committment to, ie marriage.  And since you can't marry a child lawfully in California Debra already knew she should not have sex with the boy.

 

Debra LaFave took advantage of this child, took something from him that God ordained to be a gift that he would someday give to his wife.  She has taken his innocence and treated him like a sex object.  She was not married to him and she couldn't be married to him because he is a child.  She is no different than any person who has sex with someone outside of marriage, God calls these people adulterers, fornicators and the sexually immoral.  God knows that having sex is a powerful feeling and He knows that if you have sex outside of marriage it can create feelings that you are in love with the person because that is what God designed sex to do.  When Debra had sex with this child it bonded her to him, she no longer saw him as a child, but as someone she was in love with.  All logical reasoning went out the door.  If she had the mindset that I cannot have sexual relations until I am married, then her logical reasoning would have kicked in like:  he's only a child, how will this affect his future relationships with women or his wife to be someday, I have a responsibility to lead him into responsible manhood, to show him what real love is,  to honor him as a person, to respect him, to show him how to have respectful boundaries with a person of the opposite sex.  But she didn't do any of that.  She knew what she was doingwas wrong, but she didn't listen to her conscience and now she is trying to backpeddle and come up with all kinds of ridiculous reasons why she did what she did.  And the worst part is that she has a lawyer defending her and giving her more bogus reasons to justify her actions, shame on both of them!

 

Debra LaFave broke the law and she should be punished for it.  More importanly she has scarred this young man for life, this experience will taint all of his future relationships with women and how he treats women.  She should do jail time just like any convicted child molester and she should be registered as a sex offender.  Should we feel sorry for her, yes, she is very very very lost.  Does God still love her, ABSOLUTELY YES!  Does He love her sin, ABSOLUTELY NOT!.  I pray that Debra LaFave gets the help she needs to understand the seriousness of this sin.  Is there hope for this situation, yes.  God can take any messed up life and turn it around, He can take the worst of the worst and give them real life. 

 

We have laws in this country and God tells us to respect the authority of the land if it does not contradict His word.  Debra LaFave should not be on house arrest she should be in prison!  where all the other child molesters are, she should not get special treatment.  The fact that she is on house arrest is God protecting her, nothing more and nothing less.  Debra LaFave I pray that you will listen to that still small voice in your head (God calls it your conscience) He is speaking to you. Listen to Him. 

 

Lord I am heartbroken about this situation, Lord I want to lift up the young man who is affected by all of this and ask that you heal his heart and mind about being used, he may not see it that way at this point because he himself may not even know you.  But Lord I ask that you use this situation to soften his heart and prepare his heart to come to you and accept you as his Savior.  Lord I ask that you speak to Debra and use this to soften her heart and show her that she needs you and you want to heal her and restore her life to what it should be I ask these things in Jesus name Amen

 

 

Just as your info was meant to provide nothing but good, I have faith that you will give me the same respect. God also says that he will deal with the unbeliever, if this person doesn't have a relationship with God you are wasting your breath and actually stepping on God's toes at the same time by trying to do his job. (1 corin. 5, 11-13)  and this also affects your prayer also. God will only answer the prayer of a believer and the prayer must glorify him, so a personal relationship with God has to be established first and this takes the participation of the person themselves. Be very careful on this point, on one hand your life will get easier because the whole world wont rely on your prayer, just you and the people that ask you to pray for them ( look up healing prayer in John), I have faith that your intentions are pure but so was Job's.  The last thing that Job did before God took everything from him was pray for his sons because they might have sinned, when we do this we become judgemental  especially to the unbeliever.  (Job 1, 1-6)  With Love in my heart I say these things, to keep the focus on Jesus and his message (LOVE), If you are a true unbeliever and are still reading this, get to know Jesus, he wants to know you but you have to make the first move. 

 
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