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Topic : Online Dating

Number of Replies: 1529
New Messages This Week: 0
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Created on : Friday, July 01, 2005, 05:08:34 pm
Author : dataimport
Looking to meet someone online? Or have you met the love of your life on the net already? Share the good, the bad and the ugly of online dating.

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December 1, 2005, 4:41 am CST

Worst Online Dates?

I'd love to hear about worst online dating stories  - it's good for a laugh...... :o) 

Anyone got any??? 

 
December 1, 2005, 2:56 pm CST

Watch out for married men!!

Today I took my profiles off line.  I've been doing this online dating for 8 months and the married men on there are swarming!!  I have been approached by blatant adulterors, subtle ones and ones that weave the most elaborate tales.  The last one really hit hard and hurt alot.  We corresponded via email, instant messaging and phone calls for 3 weeks.  He lives out of my state so meeting him right now was not an option.  He is 37 years old and claimed he was a widower of two years.  I won't bore you with the details of his lies, let's just say it was so convincing that I started to fall for him.  Suddenly red flags started flying [never online at night - had an excuse for that though, of course] and only called when he was heading home from work or after dropping one of his kids off at a function.  I called him on it and Bam!........he admitted it and said he was miserable in his marriage [of course he was] and that he hadn't planned on getting involved with anyone like that  - he was just looking for a friend to talk to.  And the kicker to my heart, self-esteem and self-worth was "he hadn't planned on liking me so very much......."  So what does that tell me?  That I should be someone I'm not and be a B**tch? Some people have this down to a fine art and we're the ones how ultimately suffer because of it.  I'm now going to try to figure out how to meet SINGLE men in my general and try to move on.  Any suggestions would be welcome!!  Everybody needs to be careful out there.   

 
December 4, 2005, 1:08 pm CST

Contacting men first

Does anyone have any thoughts about the woman (me) contcating the man first in the on-line dating world. In my experience ouide of on-line dating men like to be the ones that pursue the women. I know they say differently in any article you read--but i think men are flattered by the proposition but won't want a relationship if the woman is the pursuer. 

  

Has anyone been in a relationship where the woman contacted the man first/ especially in the on-line dating world? So far, i tried it 2x --one guy never responded back and the other communicated for a bit and stopped. any advice? 

 
December 4, 2005, 1:19 pm CST

re

Quote From: sarai39

 I am a 39 year old who has been hoping and praying for love for quite some time. Although I haven't found anyone worth keeping in my life I have tried a few different avenues and would like to hear from people that have had great success with the online dating which I would like to try. Although it's been tough finding someone at Equally Yoked, which I am a member of, at Elife activites and just hoping to bump into someone while I was out, I would like to try online line dating. Can anyone give me some advice as to what to say in my profile and what to expect if I should try the online dating? I haven't given up on love and I want to hear successful online dating adventures so that I can be excited for myself if that is something that I should decide to do.

I've been on-line dating for about a year now and defininately think its worth a try. I have dated some men and although there has not been a love connection they all were nice guys. My advice is only use the larger on-line dating services that charge for membership. I say this because the free sites tend to attract men looking for an easy way to have an affair or cyber sex. Keep your profie positive and free of any body or sex talk--again to keep any perverts away. Look up other members profiles and read what they say about themselves--if you think it applies to you use something similar. just from reading your post you may want t say something like " I'm looking for a good guy thats a keeper. I believe in love and i am excited to share my life with that special person"  

  

Good luck!! 

 
December 6, 2005, 6:24 pm CST

Online Dating

WHAT you need to do is sharpen your truth-detector instincts ! ...... there are alot of phony time-wasting people out there that just like to play games. THIS happens in any aspect of the dating-scene though.  

  

KEEP you chin-UP and maintain a positive attitude. ... Eric  

 
December 7, 2005, 1:31 pm CST

dating scary

Quote From: duskyangel

I'd love to hear about worst online dating stories  - it's good for a laugh...... :o) 

Anyone got any??? 

I met this guy online, he seemed like a really nice guy...we talked for about 2 months..sometimes late at night when he didnt sound himself...when i ask him about it he said that he was tired and that was all...anyway we decided to meet...i thought that a safe place would be at church...i was to meet him in the lobby in the front...i had seen a picture of him that he had sent...very nice looking..well i spent a half hour looking for him before someone walked up to me and said hi...he looked 10yrs and 70 lbs more than his picture...but i put that off and we went in and enjoyed the service...afterward he asked if i would like to go and get something to eat and i said yes..i picked a place across the street from where i live...the church was also but he didnt know that...anyway i got into his car...and before he could start the car he picked up this tube that was attacted to a mini monitor...and then he blew into it and the car started...well at that time i just said that maybe it was not a good ideal and got out of the car...no wonder he sounded so tired those nights..he was drunk...and had to prove that he was not drinking to even start his car...he called me a few times after that asking me to help him get through his problem..i stopped answering the calls. 

i am living in scotland with a long time internet friend/ boyfriend that i met online....we have our ups and downs... i will post that on another messege board.. 

 
December 8, 2005, 8:37 pm CST

Don't Do It!!

Quote From: jennbl123

Does anyone have any thoughts about the woman (me) contcating the man first in the on-line dating world. In my experience ouide of on-line dating men like to be the ones that pursue the women. I know they say differently in any article you read--but i think men are flattered by the proposition but won't want a relationship if the woman is the pursuer. 

  

Has anyone been in a relationship where the woman contacted the man first/ especially in the on-line dating world? So far, i tried it 2x --one guy never responded back and the other communicated for a bit and stopped. any advice? 

Speaking from experience, it's much better to let the man approach you first (whetther you're online or out in the real world) because you know for sure that he is interested in you. I've been pursuing a few guys online and only one replied like 3 days after I first e-mailed him and to make a long story short, he really showed that he was 'just not that into me.' He threw it in my face after an argument that we had when we last talked, that I "bugged him first" after the fact I told him that it was not a good idea to meet and it felt so good to let this go because I didn't feel right to tell my friends and family that I met a guy online. So, if I were you, I would not try to approach the guy first, let him seek you out and trust me, things will go so much smoothly and better and you'll be much happier. I hope my advice helps! Good luck.
 
December 9, 2005, 8:00 am CST

Hard in Small Community

I like in a small community and have a very full schedule. I work full time and am also a full time graduate student.  Needless to say I don't have a lot of time to go out and meet men, but that doesn't mean that I am willing to give up all together!  It has been my experience that all the men I meet online are total freaks.  They often lie about what they do (for instance the man who told me he was a college professor, only to find out he was a student who taught classes, he bragged about the house he owned (however he rented all of the rooms out to college students), oh, and he drove a scooter.)  I have met people who use racial slurs throughout the whole dinner, men who yell at the bartender when they won't serve him alchohol, men who have grabbed my hair and said "this isn't your real hair color is it", and men who sit there and tell me how they usually date women much younger than them (I am only 25).  There was the real 'catch' who called everyday for a week after having lunch once, then kept emailing me when he met another woman, only to resume calling me when she dumped him *yikes*.  I have given up on online dating!
 
December 9, 2005, 10:31 pm CST

thank you

Quote From: dulce81

Speaking from experience, it's much better to let the man approach you first (whetther you're online or out in the real world) because you know for sure that he is interested in you. I've been pursuing a few guys online and only one replied like 3 days after I first e-mailed him and to make a long story short, he really showed that he was 'just not that into me.' He threw it in my face after an argument that we had when we last talked, that I "bugged him first" after the fact I told him that it was not a good idea to meet and it felt so good to let this go because I didn't feel right to tell my friends and family that I met a guy online. So, if I were you, I would not try to approach the guy first, let him seek you out and trust me, things will go so much smoothly and better and you'll be much happier. I hope my advice helps! Good luck.

thank you for the advice--i was thinking it wasn't a good idea--but of course my friends talked me into it--by saying that that is what these services are for and what do you have to lose. So far it doesn't seem promising  contacting them first from my experience and now yours too. Thank you for responding and sharing your experience 

  

Jennifer 

 
December 10, 2005, 3:17 am CST

Online dating story

Quote From: duskyangel

I'd love to hear about worst online dating stories  - it's good for a laugh...... :o) 

Anyone got any??? 

I started corresponding with a man who said he was 56 and widowed this year. In one of our IM conversations he said thet he was 9 years older than his wife when she died, and she was 57---so I said, "I thought your were 56" and he said "That was a mis-print on the site. I'm 66, not 56. I was born in 1939, not 1949" . Mis-print my foot!!! all he had to do was go online and change the dang number. 

Also briefly corresponded with someone who said he was a police officer. God help us if he was. He was one of the most crude, rude, obnoxious, egotistical jerks I've ever met.  He refused to meet in a public place because "people know me really well b/c I'm a cop...I can't enjoy myself when people are staring at me". Don't worry, I wasn't  stupid.  Also bragged about how he could kill a man with his bare hands, & so I would be "safe" with him.. because he would "protect" me....What???!  

 
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