Topic : Online Dating

I tried Match.com for a while, with disasterous results. Met a "charming" local guy who turned out to be a "sweetheart swindler" and is in prison now for the third time for this same type of criminal activity. When he started bringing up investment opportunities, I ran for the hills, and did not lose anything to him. However he bilked many Match.com women, who fell for his bogus persona, out of nearly half a million dollars. Sadly, they'll never get their money back. Unfortunately the internet is the latest tool for these con men to operate and find victims. And because many of the people looking for love online are lonely and vulnerable they are ripe targets for sociopathic criminals who are skilled predators. Just beware.

You are right-and I do not have that kind of money for  match.com or e-harmony-  On another online sight-I have met some REAL  pieces of works and they are just as bad as the criminals-  Beware is SO true- These guys are getting trickier and trickier- Despite all the bad experiences  I had- I guess I should be glad that I found out before it was too late-  It didn't do any good for my heart and soul-  

Not only that- you try to warn other women and they do not listen-and these guys are fooling and lying to them-But these women will find out sooner or later-  The ones that treated me badly will do it to another 'victim' She will not know what hit her-  I appreciate your warning-It is SO true-   

( I got scammed by one and had to pay almost 200 for a bill-  ) 

    well dateing on line might be fun but had really bad luck with guys i was beat and rap by a guy and also almost got my nose broken by a guy. could you help me get over of being scard of guys.   Dr phil help me please. Thanks Diane kunz

Fortunetly though I didn't put any money into the dating site (this was on yahoo).  I was very specific about what I did and did not want and I think maybe out of 20 people who contacted me in about 3 days, 1 remotely met my criteria and the only one matched it decently (we emailed a few times and that was the end of that).   It appeared to me the same usual types that I have no interest in whatsoever, combined with about 5 absolute creeps.  One sent me the most sexist quiz I have ever seen and I think another 2 at least were con artists and not even good at hiding it.  3 days of online dating was enough me for me.   

My recomendation? Slow it all down.
Use a penpal service and find a friend. Someone with common interests. Even if you don't find a mate, you'll at least make a friend.


Hopefully something can develop from there.
-HS

I have to agree with many of the posts here regarding online dating, especially match and yahoo.  I've tried off and on for a couple years. In the beginning I went in like I think a lot of us do, open, honest and hopeful thinking the men were being the same.  I was actually surprised that Dr Phil would associate with Match since, to me it's nothing but a big meat market. I met several people through Match but easily 85% really misrepresented themselves either in body size, age, old pictures, marital status, etc. but mostly it was about their getting laid.  And Yahoo...I haven't paid for a membership in over a year but left my profile there in case someone who seems interesting comes along, but that hasn't happened and the same men are on there that were 2-3 years ago. That should tell us something. I find most men are just using it as a constant search for another conquest and really don't want the LTR they claim they're looking for. In our area news, a man was arrested for murdering a woman, her baby daughter and her sister because she wouldn't go out with him. He had a profile on match.com.  After his arrest they discovered evidence that he had also murdered another woman a couple years earlier.  Obviously, these types of people exist on and off the net, but it does relate to some of the scarier aspects of meeting total strangers. As women, we are eternal optimists and the majority of us have good hearts, though slightly bruised in most cases.  If you're going to meet off the web you must really take precautions and go in with both eyes open.  For me, I'm back to hanging at Home Depot.

I was a member of Match.com for several months,  I didn't meet anyone in person but did have email and phone calls exchanged.  It seemed the more I talked to someone I had the feeling they weren't  what they claimed to be in their profile.  Now I am a member of eharmony and have met one person so far, he seems to be honest but lives over an hour away from me.  We met for lunch once and he seemed honest but since he lives quite a distance from me I don't know how to handle seeing more of him at this point, other profiles I have been receiving all seem to be to good to be true, at my age, 59, I don't want to fall into situations that I have read on this message board and I watched Dr. Phil, the show on dating, does anyone have some concrete advise for me from experience?  I sure would appreciate it as I don't want to give up looking for that special someone.

July 17 I am an older "single" from the east coast. I was also surprised that Dr.Phil would be all over match.com pages/b ooks/tapes/advice. The problem with this service is that they do not run a check on the applicants (they will have to charge more) I have watched Dr.Phil's shows on the subject and he only gives "common sense" advice. I met soeone in match and went out with him for 1.5 years. He had many of the qualities I required/want but he was jealous and this was a big no no for me. I tried e-harmony and they kept sending me profiles from old men in Florida (my cut off date age is 72). We have music lovers' exchange here and that at least provided me with people who sang, knew or enjoy other art in many forms, I do not want marriage or a ltr, I only want to explore and what comes next is ok. I am shocked that women will lie about their legal status but it has happened to someone I know. Many married men lie all the time and I found two of them them out, but one has to be cautious and savvy. Another guy was an one was 20 years older than he claimed. I am sure that the women in home depot are getting a lot of help from you and best of luck! latininva3

There are check systems on the web but they cost money. One can meet some people at coffee shops, don't give your phone number, etc. and if this possible pair find themselves liking each other ask: drivers license (how do you know who they really are) check out the address or fim they give you. Why only the cell phone number? with "no name or restricted" and no way to verify the call? etc. etc. Been there, done that. don't fall in love first and check later. It may be too late and too dangerous. There are serices that check the members out but they do cost from $3000 to 5000. latininva3 Try it, you will live longr.