part of being an adult is deciding how you feel, what oyu believe instead of what oyu believe. you say that you were raised this and that. thats is fin ebut do you agree with it. you this is the time that you decide what your beliefs will be, what your priorities will be, what oyu want out of life. This is one reason people do not like young people to get married, they do not yet know what they want. I have posted mainly on the abuse board but wanted to share parts of my experience with you.
first if he is viewing porn and you dont like it. you have to tell him. if he agrees to not view it he must not and he must not go behind your back. if he does not agree to stop something that is bothering oyu you have to figure out itf that is osmething oyu can live with. to me that means he does not respect you and how you feel and that is osmething that a husband should do is respect you and your feelings.
i got married in 2002, i turned 19, he turned 20 then the next day we got married. at that point i had known him for a year. we had gotten engageg in december and broken up and then gotten back together in february. we ogt back together. i wanted the commintment from him. it ho ught he wanted to give it. orginalyl his birthomother was planning the wedding but i did not know anyhting about it and it was my wedding. so when we got back togeter i said we are doing this wedding on our own. at any rate my husband and i got married. he was not ready tog et married but didnot want to risk losing me so he married me. i had no idea he felt this way till recently as we are talking as we are goin through a divorce.
the anxiety you feel may just be normal for moving out and being on your own, being an adult. it may also be you are worried how your financee will treat you when others are not around. keep your eyes wide open. pay attention to what he says and how he treats you and others as well as animals this will say alot about his character. the saying to pay attention to how he treats people in the service industry is true too. waitress, ect... listen to your gut. listen to your heart, listen to your head. but listen to your gut. your gut is never ever wrong. if ihad listened tomy gut i would not be where i am. make sure the communication lines are open. btw.. yelling at each other is not playing. adn arguing all the time is not joking around. a goo didea would be to do some premarital counseling. this will help you to define what you both expect out of marriage and what you expect from each toher as well if oyu have common goals.
