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Topic : Sex

Number of Replies: 559
New Messages This Week: 0
Last Reply On:
Created on : Friday, July 01, 2005, 05:09:39 pm
Author : dataimport
Are you happy with your sex life? Or do you ask, "What sex life?" Share your story with other singles.

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January 21, 2008, 9:37 pm CST

I need advice...

Well I've been dating this amazing man for the past year. Everything is great between us we both have the same views on pretty  much everything, including saving sex until marriage.  The only problem is is that I think I'm afraid of sex. 

 

I was in a  really bad relationship before I started dating the man I'm with now.  He would always pressure sex on me even when I said I wasn't ready.  He was good at manipulating me into saying yes.  But when it came to actually having sex (which we never did have sex)  I would freak out, and start crying and hyperventilating. After getting frustrated with me for about 10 minutes he would give up. This happend many more times than I can count.  Towards the end of our relationship he gave up on having sex with me which was a big relief .  I finally ended the relationship after a year when I realized he didn't love me or care about me.  When I left the relationship I had no self esteem and no sexual desires at all. 

 

Soon after my current boyfirend came into the picture. He helped me get past all the pain and hurt from my last relationship. However a few months ago me and my boyfriend were fooling around and we got more sexual than I wanted to be.  I felt like my past was haunting me again.  I told him to stop and I wasn't ready for what we were doing. He got frustrated and asked me if I was going to be like this on our honeymoon. I bursted out crying of course, and he apologized for hurting my feelings, and told me he wouldn't try anything like that again. What scarred me the most was that I wasn't at all offended by what he said, but I was scarred by the thought of freaking out on our wedding night when we would actually attempt to have sex.

 

Please help I really need some advice.

 
January 22, 2008, 8:44 am CST

Sex

Quote From: krissie05

Well I've been dating this amazing man for the past year. Everything is great between us we both have the same views on pretty  much everything, including saving sex until marriage.  The only problem is is that I think I'm afraid of sex. 

 

I was in a  really bad relationship before I started dating the man I'm with now.  He would always pressure sex on me even when I said I wasn't ready.  He was good at manipulating me into saying yes.  But when it came to actually having sex (which we never did have sex)  I would freak out, and start crying and hyperventilating. After getting frustrated with me for about 10 minutes he would give up. This happend many more times than I can count.  Towards the end of our relationship he gave up on having sex with me which was a big relief .  I finally ended the relationship after a year when I realized he didn't love me or care about me.  When I left the relationship I had no self esteem and no sexual desires at all. 

 

Soon after my current boyfirend came into the picture. He helped me get past all the pain and hurt from my last relationship. However a few months ago me and my boyfriend were fooling around and we got more sexual than I wanted to be.  I felt like my past was haunting me again.  I told him to stop and I wasn't ready for what we were doing. He got frustrated and asked me if I was going to be like this on our honeymoon. I bursted out crying of course, and he apologized for hurting my feelings, and told me he wouldn't try anything like that again. What scarred me the most was that I wasn't at all offended by what he said, but I was scarred by the thought of freaking out on our wedding night when we would actually attempt to have sex.

 

Please help I really need some advice.

Hey, it might well be that you have anxiety's towards sex. Don't worry you are not alone and it isn't uncurable. I suggest you try to find a psychologist who helps you over the fears with cognitive behaverial therapy. (there are lots of other therapies avaiable but I think that this one might  do the trick in this case)

 

It is a short therapy of around 8-10 sessions on average (though longer is always an option if it is necesary)

 

Good luck and I am shure you can overcome this,

xx Oet Gäöl

 
January 24, 2008, 5:18 pm CST

Sex

Quote From: noni1973

Hello all,

It's been a long time since I've posted on the boards, but I do need some advice around a situation I am in.

I have been having coffee with a fellow for the last month, he is the one who initiates these meetings, and because I am aware that he has a long distance relationship of four years, I am careful with my behaviour.

I have to admit, that first coffee meeting stirred up something in me... our eyes locked and I just felt this connection that left me questioning what the hell had happened.

Our interests are very similar and I know (he has told me) that the relationship is not going the way he's like it to.

My problem is this: he has invited me to his house next week (the girlfriend is still away) to play some guitar. He said he doesn't invite people over and made out I would be somehow 'special'  for being invited. I also know that he spent last night with a woman out of town. What could this guy be doing?? He says the girlfriend is spending time with other men on the other side of the world. I am very confused about where I am in all of this, am trying to build a healthy relationship lifestyle, although my hormones are running rampant! I know he is not a sure bet... but why would he invite me to his house?

PS: I'm not silly- the energy he sends out is definitely questionable.

Thanks for you help. Noni. xx

I say GO FOR IT!!!!  What do you have to lose?  If it doesn't go anywhere then oh well - but hey at least you tried.  If the chemistry is as good as you say then you will regret not going.
 
February 16, 2008, 1:29 pm CST

need some advice i have been seeing someone for almost one year. we do fine when we're together but when we are apart we have a argument about phone sex. he has a higher sex drive than I do and he always wants to have sex over the phone and sometimes i'm

 
 
March 6, 2008, 8:47 am CST

You've got every right

Quote From: helena309

um hi.im only 13 and many of my boyfriends already wanna have sex with me but i say no im going to wait intill im married am i right or wrong for that?

Alot of guys are horny at that age and want to have sex no matter what. If you've set values for yourself and really want to stick to them, more power to you. I said i wanted to wait and have sex till i got married but it didn't turn out how i wanted it to. Just be cautious and if they don't like it, they'll have to get over it. It's your decision alone when you're ready to have sex. Keep it up.

 
March 6, 2008, 8:48 am CST

You've got every right

Quote From: helena309

um hi.im only 13 and many of my boyfriends already wanna have sex with me but i say no im going to wait intill im married am i right or wrong for that?

Alot of guys are horny at that age and want to have sex no matter what. If you've set values for yourself and really want to stick to them, more power to you. I said i wanted to wait and have sex till i got married but it didn't turn out how i wanted it to. Just be cautious and if they don't like it, they'll have to get over it. It's your decision alone when you're ready to have sex. Keep it up.

 
March 11, 2008, 4:54 pm CDT

Umm whats wrong with teens nowadays???

Hi! Well, I'm only 15 and i'm in a relationship.

I would definatly NOT go anyfurther in any of my relationships than making out.

I definatly don't beleive in teens having SEX.

I broke up with my last boyfriend because of it. Everyday we would meet before school and he would ask me everyday to skip and go have sex with him after 4  months of saying NO im to young and stuff i broke up with him. I MADE THE RIGHT DECISION.  look at all the teens nowadays with children do they look happy? Do they have a lot of money? NO. NO to all the things. why would you even want to risk any of that stuff?     ya'll DONT GIVE IN AND DONT GIVE YOUR SOUL AWAY to someone you probobly wont stay with your life.   

                             thats all i have to say   Im a teen i know pressure is hard but if i can do it you can 

 
March 11, 2008, 4:58 pm CDT

Sex

Quote From: maggie9130

I say GO FOR IT!!!!  What do you have to lose?  If it doesn't go anywhere then oh well - but hey at least you tried.  If the chemistry is as good as you say then you will regret not going.

ummm i think you should be carfull that he aint a "bad guy" or something... i m not trying to sound dumb or anything just be carfull

 

 
March 14, 2008, 6:43 am CDT

Sex

Quote From: courtneyerin

Hi! Well, I'm only 15 and i'm in a relationship.

I would definatly NOT go anyfurther in any of my relationships than making out.

I definatly don't beleive in teens having SEX.

I broke up with my last boyfriend because of it. Everyday we would meet before school and he would ask me everyday to skip and go have sex with him after 4  months of saying NO im to young and stuff i broke up with him. I MADE THE RIGHT DECISION.  look at all the teens nowadays with children do they look happy? Do they have a lot of money? NO. NO to all the things. why would you even want to risk any of that stuff?     ya'll DONT GIVE IN AND DONT GIVE YOUR SOUL AWAY to someone you probobly wont stay with your life.   

                             thats all i have to say   Im a teen i know pressure is hard but if i can do it you can 

Well your young so do wait untill you feel ready.

You indeed made the right decision with the last boyfriend, he was out for sex not you otherwise the kissing would've been good enough for him untill you wanted to move on, good call.

 

the rest of it well, there are teen moms who are happy (I know one myself) and a few (though only a handfull I think) who even chose to be pregnant at a young age.

 
March 24, 2008, 6:03 am CDT

Crossdressing?

I have been living with my boyfriend a little over a year now.  We had a wonderful relationship for the first 4 months. We were intimate and had a sex almost daily. Our relationship was rocky for the past 8 months. Recently I discovered he had a so called urger to crossdress and watch pornos. Meanwhile we have no intimacy. He says he isn't gay no has no desire to be with a man but he has no desire to be with me.  He says he does but we do not have any intimacy or sex. I caught him with womens clothing and watching porn. I felt so hurt and ugly. I am very frustrated. I keep myself in good shape and I am conscious of how I dress and look. He says he loves me. He says he will not go on any crossdressing sites or crossdress anymore. Is   there any hope for him to become attracted to me again or does he have gay tendencies? 
 
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