My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years this April. We are expecting our first baby together at the end of February. He has been my 3 year old's father since he was one. Our relationship has been rocky for the majority of the time at best. But here is my biggest dilemma: My grandfather passed away last Friday, I was blessed enough to be with him and my family as his struggle came to an end. I felt it best to stay with my grandma for about a week, just to keep her company and to help out in any way that I could. My boyfriend and i had been having some problems, and were not sure if we were staying together, but he understood that I needed to be there for my family. I came home Saturday morning to get some of mine and my son's clothes since we would be staying about an hour away. He was very lovey and cuddly with me while I was here, and called to check on me while I was away...all the time telling me how much he loved me. He told me later that night over the phone that he had ran into a couple of old friends at the gas station and had given them his cell phone number. I told him I thought it was great that he reconnected with people from his past. Later that night he said that the two he met, who are female, came over to the house and stayed for about 5 minutes before leaving. I asked why they didn't stay very long and he said that he didn't know, they must have been bored.
On Monday, he said that he would continue to keep trying to put our relationship back together until I told him that there was no hope. I told him that morning on the phone that I just didn't think it was going to work between us as a couple, and that maybe we were better friends than lovers. He called me that night crying saying that he loved me and just wanted the chance for our family to be together. This is usually the pattern whenever I have tried to call things off in the past, and as usual, I always agree to give it one more try.
I had an OB appointment Tuesday afternoon, and drove an hour to pick him up from the house so that he could come with me, and an hour back to the doctor's office. Everything was great on our drive. We talked more and joked around, and it was just like our better version of normal. While we were waiting in the exam room for the doctor to come in, one of us, and I'm not sure which, brought up the girl's that had come over to see him. His story was different from the original that he had told me, and right off I knew that he was lying about what had happened. I told him that he was lying about something, and that he might as well come clean. He said that he wasn't lying, nothing had happened between him and either of the girls. I asked him again if he had sex with either and he denied it. I told him that I really needed to know, since we had had unprotected sex earlier that day if he had slept with either of them he could be putting mine and our babies life in jeopardy. You guessed it, he had unprotected sex with one of the girls. I was completely dumbfounded and didn't know what to say! He said that he didn't want to tell me because he didn't want to hurt me and that he was not proud of what he had done. After listening to him beg and cry for the hour drive back home, I once again agreed to give our relationship another shot. Now the more I think about it, the angrier I get. At him for what he did and at myself for taking him back again. He keeps saying that he didn't cheat because he wasn't sure that we were staying together. I feel otherwise.
I was also angry with the girl. How could she not see all of my stuff around the house and not know that he was attached? How could she have sex with a guy right next to our son's bed on the floor? He told her that we were not together and that I had not yet completely moved out, and she believed him. I want to be angry with her, but honestly it is not her fault. Her only fault is being stupid enough to believe him.
So what do I do? Do I stay once again and try to work things out? Do I just say enough is enough? I don't know how to get past this, or if I even can? Was it really cheating, or am I just being silly thinking it was? Please help me, I don't know what else to do!!!
