Topic : Tired of Being Single

Hello! 

Maybe you haven't met the right woman yet. 

  

What is your definition of  "good" woman?  

Do you have a pattern in what kind of women you are dating, what are these women like and is it these kind of charistics/personalities you are looking for? 

Are your standards to high or to low when it comes to women? 

And how are you in a relationship? 

How would you like to be in a relationship? 

  

It's alot things to know about who you are and what you want from a relationship with another person. 

All the best 

Love/ Feliss 

I know exactly why I am alone, and it's only partly by choice. I don't know you, but if you care to reveal a little more about  yourself, I bet I could offer a bit of advice. I am a "been there, done that" person who hopes he is done making mistakes, so I have a lot of experience to draw from, and it would be a shame to waste it. You sound to me like you are a pretty decent sort, and perhaps you are holding out for the best match possible. There is nothing wrong with that, but if you aren't careful, that can turn into years of being alone, with some miserable bouts of loneliness thrown in. Sometimes you can't see the forest for the trees.

dear feliss75,  

      i read your reply to my message and you really made me think about somethings that i havent thought of in a long time. to answer your questions my definition of a good woman would have to be honest, pretty, not drop dead gorgeous, takes care of her self. like to stay home and go out every now and then. she can communicate with out screaming when she is mad. i have now pattern at all. i think my standards are not set high or to low. i think i am good in a relationship i like to share things  with my partner like over dinner or while we are laying on the couch watching a movie after my kids are in bed. i try to do everything 100% all the time. i would really like to be in a relationship now. it has been a long time since i have had a adult conversation. someone to share in responsibilities in making decisions to raise my kids up (and hers if any )to be good people. if you think you could help me with anything to make it easier than please do so. i forgot to say that i find it very hard for me to walk up to a lady and ask her out ot even talk to her. i have been this way as long as i can remember.                                           thank you,   tm81571 

Hi! 

I'm happy that I could be to some assistance for you. 

As a woman myself I usually like when guys just come up and say hi (if I'm out at a bar or social event) without any expectations that this have to lead to something, because we all are a little afraid of new people and would like to be able to see what kind of person the person is. Of course it's nothing wrong with wanting someone to share your life with, but it's not a good thing to have that attitude or pressure on people/women that you have just met.  

Don't get me wrong I'm not saying you are doing this, this for everyone to think about. 

I'm single and also of course eventually would like to meet someone. The thing is that I am at peace or starting to be at peace with the person I'm discovering who I am now, and I am also discovering what my needs are and how I want people to treat me.  

This is me and my opinions. Think about that you might not feel that my opinion is not right for you or only some of it, and every woman is not like me. 

Take care and let me know how it goes. 

Love/ Jenny 

Hey everyone! 

  

I haven't been here in several months. It's good to be back. I recently had a date with this great guy. He was polite, kind, funny and attractive. I thought we hit it off, but I haven't heard from him and it's been a week. Now, I know that he obviously isn't interested...the issue is that knowing that, I can't get him off my mind. What is up with that? Is it a case of wanting what you can't have? Do I kjust need to get over it?? 

Well about me I'm in my 20's divorced with one child that just turned 4 in August, the marriage did not last for numerous reasons and both my ex and I are very happy to be apart. I have dated since the divorce a few being very serious relationships some being more friendships than anything else or maybe just curiosity.  I guess the ONE I'm looking for would be a man that is independent, older than me I seem to connect better with older men I guess because I was the youngest child and wasn't around anyone my age, I'm a flirter but playfull flirting nothing too seductive just fun and a like a man that is secure enough to be the same way. I like to meet new people go new places.

Good things come to those who wait. Sounds like to me you have your head on straight all these so called women need to get their head examined. Being a good father now will benefit in the future. Hang in there. There are still some good women in the world.

 My little sister is dating a guy who cheated on her, and I can't understand it.  It's driving me crazy.

She's in college in New York City.  They became interested in each other just before their summer vacation in May 2005.  According to my sister, he's a wonderful guy.  She was definitely interested, but he was not certain because he had doubts due to their religious differences--she's mildly Catholic, while he's trying to be a committed Protestant. 

While she was in another country studying for the summer, he slept with some girl he met in summer session in New York.

And then, when she came back to New York, he told her that he slept with this other girl, but that he is still interested in my sister.  He says all this nonsense that "yeah, you shouldn't get back together with me."  But, it's not like he's leaving her alone.

So, at first, my sister tells me she won't get back with him but that she still wants to be friends.  Since they get along so well, and she thinks he's such a nice guy.  At least he was honest enough to tell her about the cheating, blah blah.  I told her to stay away from him, because you can't be _friends_ with a guy who you're seriously attracted to.

But now, she's dating him.  Argh!!!  This is her first boyfriend, because she has been so careful in the past to avoid being in useless relationships.  I know she would tell me to get the heck away from my guy if he did this to me.  But she gives me every excuse in the book to stay with this useless cheater.  I know she has some self-esteem issues.  Because he's so 'nice & friendly,' he gets along with lots people (has lots of friends who are girls).  I think she thinks he's so great because so many people like him and he's fun and they connect personality-wise.  But the fact is he CHEATED .... and had casual sex with some girl he just met.

I don't know what to do.  How do I convince her she's making a big mistake?  How do I get her out of this relationship before he hurts her again?  Is there anything I can do?

concerned big sister

I am 38/f I have never been married, had widely-spaced, long-term reationships and haven't had one in more than five years. I am smart, funny, pretty, curvy, but not fat, am interested in everything and I am a great friend - everything any man could ever want. Yet, here I am in Los Angeles, surrounded by shallow plastic supermodels and I can't get the time of day from a straight guy down here. :P I was recently diagnosed with ADHD and at first, I thought that was the problem. I got on meds and began managing my illness, but no change in the love-life. I am in therapy and working hard to improve myself, but its like men can't see me at all. Is there some way I can make myself more obvious? I mean, sometimes its like being invisible. If you don't weigh 40lbs dripping wet, have the IQ of a turnip and a boob job, you aren't worth anything to them and that just seems sad. I feel like the men who have fallen for that image are getting gypped as well. There has to be a way to meet men and get them to actually see the person I am, rather than the ideal they are looking for, right?

hey torijean34, 

           i read what you wrote to me and that i do have a lot of patience and that i am waiting but sometimes i get tired of waiting. i haven't had a adult conversation in about 3 years now. i know that in the long run that the most important thing is for me to raise my kids to the best i can but it also would be nice to have a second opinion when it comes to somethings. thank you for your opinion and i hope to hear from you soon!!!!!!! 

                                                           thanks from texas