Topic : Differing Sex Drives

My wife and i, Have been married for over 10 years.

Most of the time we have sex once or maybe 2 times a week.(great)

We both enjoy it, and we both orgasm,  me in the act, and her in the act, with help of a toy.(vibrator)

It has just come to light that my wife masterbates when i am not home.(uses vibrater or massager)

If she is off work for a day, or goes in late to work, or home early, she says she might masterbate.

she does not do it all the time, but just on the times she is home alone- maybe 2-3 time a month.

I told her, I don't care that she masterbates, but i have also told her that it makes me feel like i am not enough for her.

her responce is that it is differnt masterbating , when she is alone, and that it is none of my business.(i don't understand that, how is it differnt, same feeling))

i have masterbated on my own before, but only when my wife is not  available.(out of town)

she says she is happy with our sex, and the amount we do it,(1-2 times a week) so i don't understand why i get up, and leave for work, and she masterbates, after we had sex the night before.

I have a VERY flexible job, All i ask is for her to call me, when she has the desire. she has allways said she does not have as much sex drive as 'other women' but if she is masterbating 'on the side' then she does have more sex drive, and she is contradicting herself. she also says sex is a differnt feeling then masterbation, I understand, because she needs her clit stimulated to orgasm, so with that said, i could orgasm by watching her.

she feels like this whole thing is none of my business.

just wanted someone apinion.

Thank you

Your feeling left out, I get it. But it is different.  Having sex with you is.. well... work... she has to put her attention on you.  Having an orgasm with a vibrator by herself, is just her making herself feel good and not having to worry about you.  Do you get it now?  She doesn't have to worry about what your feeling, if your being touched where you want to be touched, if your getting off.  All she has to worry about and enjoy when she pleasures herself, is how she is feeling.. it only takes a few minutes for a woman to get off when she does it herself.  This being because we know where to touch, how strong to touch and how long to touch and bing bang boom its over done with and she can shower get dressed and go to work.  No, hot sweaty sex, no feeling involved for you, just her making herself feel good.

Don't feel rejected, if she wanted more one on one sex with you then she would ask for it or iniate it but since she isn't, then she likes what she is doing to herself and with you.  If she says she's happy, then she probably is.  Don't worry about something you can't control.  If this is the biggest problem in your marriage, then  you have the world by the tail!