Topic : Differing Sex Drives

Hello, 

I have heard about this problem with many couples.  The wife does not feel as attractive as she used to because she has put on weight - she doesn't want to have sex or do it with the lights on; or her partner pleases her in every way, but she does not return the favor.  It's sad, but it's pretty common.   

I have heard my guy friends tell me that they satisfy their wives, but the wives refuse to give a little oral sex in return.  I tell them that their wives are just plain selfish, and that they should talk about it if it's going to get any better.  Sometimes, sex is used as a weapon...it only happens when the person in control wants it, using sex to get whatever he/she wants.  I saw some apes at the San Diego Zoo that did the same thing.  The male had food that the female wanted, so she gave him some tail, and he gave her some food.  LOL!   

Hello, I really did not want to say anything, but if this helps someone else, here it goes.  My husband and I have been married for 26 years.  It has been a struggle from the beginning, and I think we have stayed together because we are "used to each other."  In other words, we support each other.  We also do love, trust,  and respect each other.   

I had noticed that when he quit smoking, the problems with his lack of stamina during sex went away.  I have given a lot of though to the problem...he gets an erection, and orgasms quickly, one minute tops it seems.  He knows that he will become flaccid after we engage in sex after a few minutes into it, so he rushes, and is anxious to orgasm before his penis has a chance to become flaccid.   

No, it is not my tight vaginal muscles, or my talent; it's him.  LOL!  He went to the doctor this past   Saturday, and the doc said that he has high blood pressure to go along with the premature ejaculation/flaccidity problem.  I have told my husband that he could solve both problems if he just quit smoking for good.  Instead, he wants to try Levitra or something of the sort which can have side effects.  He isn't thinking straight.  I won't even kiss him because I don't like to taste cigarettes or smell it on him.  He won't give up smoking, so it makes me feel that smoking is more important to him than a healthy sex life with me.    

Your husband may have a health problem, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, or diabetes which can contribute to sexual problems.  Make an appt. for him, and if he smokes and you ask him to quit, you may be able to solve the problems brought on by smoking.  I just can't seem to get it through my husband's head!  Quit smoking, and you won't need pills!   He is creating the problems.   

My boyfriend and I have been together almost four years, I would be happy having sex every night- my boyfriend is the total opposite! He can go a week or longer without the desire for sex...I used to feel like it was me that I wasn't attractive enough or that he didn't want me but now I think it's all about him. Anybody with this problem?  

Hello, again... 

I forgot to say that my husband kept telling me that he just wasn't interested in sex.  I asked him if he was not interested in sex with me or with anyone else?  He said he had lost interest in sex altogether.   

I began to analyze the situation.  Of course he would say he is not interested in sex!  Since he knows he cannot satisfy me because it lasts about one minute, and he knows he will become flaccid - in order to avoid being disappointed in the fact that he ejaculates too quickly and/or becomes flaccid and cannot satisfy me; he would rather just avoid sex, period!   That may be what is occurring in your marriage.  Just be upfront with your husband.  Tell him how you feel, and maybe you may find a solution that you both could live with.  As for me, I don't know if I'll ever have sex again, or until we can take care of the problem.  This is very frustrating and hurtful because he keeps pushing me away.  The thought of him taking a pill when we are going to have sex turns me off completely.  I would rather not do it.  God Bless!  

I won't have anyhting to do with a man who desires anal sex. I heard people who do that are at a higher risk for AIDS and Hemmoroids. Also I hear too much nowaydays of boys being sexually abused as much as girls. I have two sons and I would kill any SOB who tried that on my boys. 

I don't see thw whole fad of anal sex. We oughta ask the guys to try having it done and see how they like something big being rammed repaetedly up their butts.