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Topic : Differing Sex Drives

Number of Replies: 1827
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Created on : Friday, July 01, 2005, 05:17:33 pm
Author : dataimport
"He wants it twice a day!" "She would be happy to go a whole month without touching me." Does this sound familiar?

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July 25, 2005, 9:23 am CDT

Differing Sex Drives

Men and Women are different.  Us women have kids hanging on us and demanding our emotional attention.... Sex is emotional for us as well.  Sometimes it is difficult to have anything left at the end of the day for your man.  But guess what?  It is a neccessary way for him to express his love for you.  Maybe try waking up when he does and send him off right!  You might skip the feelings of guilt or resentment if you mix it up a bit and he knows that there are other options.  It isn't always about me, if I waited till I felt good about my body, or if I was in the mood, or if I wasn't mad at my husband for something, he would probably never get any!  But when I think about how much he adores me know matter what, I can get into it and I am so glad I did!  TIP:  When you're not feeling "in the mood", get out of bed and sneak into the bathroom, brush your teeth and put some of your favorite sexy perfume on and you might turn yourself on!
 
July 26, 2005, 9:46 am CDT

Is this workable?

My husband and I have been married for about a year and a half and we hardly ever have sex anymore.  Part of the reason is that we also have a two year old.  But for the most part the thought of him just doesn't turn me on.  He's a great guy, but also very lazy and sometimes inconsiderate.  Our schedules are also very different.  He works overnight, and I'm in college.  He is usually going to bed as I'm getting up.

 

Between our son and school, I'm just not interested in having sex with him at all.  Recently we were having some major non communication.  Later, after we talked it out, he admitted to me that he had visited porn sites in the past but was real vague about when the last time he visited was.  This is my second marriage, and I feel more and more like I'm trying to raise two kids instead of just he two year old.  We talk about what frustrates me between my husband and I, but nothing really changes.  What, and how, can this issue be worked out?  Any ideas/hints?  We both want our son to have siblings.

 
July 26, 2005, 11:47 am CDT

Scheduling for a new baby

Quote From: rayvinfive

My husband and I have been married for about a year and a half and we hardly ever have sex anymore. Part of the reason is that we also have a two year old. But for the most part the thought of him just doesn't turn me on. He's a great guy, but also very lazy and sometimes inconsiderate. Our schedules are also very different. He works overnight, and I'm in college. He is usually going to bed as I'm getting up.

Between our son and school, I'm just not interested in having sex with him at all. Recently we were having some major non communication. Later, after we talked it out, he admitted to me that he had visited porn sites in the past but was real vague about when the last time he visited was. This is my second marriage, and I feel more and more like I'm trying to raise two kids instead of just he two year old. We talk about what frustrates me between my husband and I, but nothing really changes. What, and how, can this issue be worked out? Any ideas/hints? We both want our son to have siblings.

Quit school. I'm serious. Either this or your husband has to get a new job. Something to put the two of you on the same schedule. Your marriage has to be your top priority. It's supposed to outlast everything, right. It won't if you keep denying your husband. His porn use will escalate into full-blown adultery. Porn use has a way of doing this. You've obviously placed the sexual part of your relationship on the back burner and made it a very low priority. Your relationship should be your number one priority, above even your child. And honestly, I would say the last thing in the world you both need right now is another baby. You don't even have time for the sex that is necessary to make another baby. I know this all sounds very harsh but I couldn't be more serious. You're married now. Your marriage, and this goes for both of you, has to become more important than the perfect job, the perfect education, etc. And I'm a college teacher, so I understand the importance of a college education. And still, I'm advising you to put your marriage first instead.
 
July 26, 2005, 2:24 pm CDT

On The Show

I unfortunately am just like the woman on the show today who would cry during sex.  To me sex has always been about my partner's power over me when I am in a vulnerable position.  I dread sex constantly and try to avoid it.  I even avoid being intimate in other ways because of the fear that sex will be what is expected next.  It isn't fair to him and he often complains.  I know it makes him feel horrible when I turn him down but I am scared out of my mind.  Any advice that might help?
 
July 26, 2005, 4:54 pm CDT

help

I enjoy sex but unfortunately my husband is impotent most of the time and when he is not, he suffers from premature ejaculation.  What do I do?  We have been married for 11 years and I am at the point of calling it quits.  I have expressed my concerns but they fall on deaf ears.  He has some viagra but won't use it.  I'm sure he is concerned about the possible negative side effects of this drug.  Is it fair of me to push him to use it?  I would appreciate any advice?
 
July 27, 2005, 9:00 am CDT

My girlfriend never ask me for having sex

I've been with my girlfriend for 4 years, we don't live together, ,we both have a child. Every two weeks our kid is with his other parent so we are alone and «free». We have both our house.

We always make love the same way and I always ask her to do it. She often tell me that she could live completely without it. I am 44 years old and she is 48. She is pre menoposed. I bought Dr Phil book, I took an appointement with a sex doctor, she does'nt want to hear nothing with both approches.

 

When we make love , once every two weeks,  she waits that I'm over with it.

 

I love her , and I would like to have an happy love life with her.

 

Excuse my english and thanks for reading.

 

 
July 27, 2005, 9:10 am CDT

New schedule

Quote From: lilacmess

Quit school. I'm serious. Either this or your husband has to get a new job. Something to put the two of you on the same schedule. Your marriage has to be your top priority. It's supposed to outlast everything, right. It won't if you keep denying your husband. His porn use will escalate into full-blown adultery. Porn use has a way of doing this. You'veobviously placedthe sexualpart of your relationship on the back burner and made it a very low priority.Yourrelationshipshould be your number one priority, above even your child.And honestly,I would say the lastthing in the world you both need right now is another baby.You don't even have time for the sex that is necessaryto make another baby. I know this all sounds very harsh but I couldn't be more serious. You're married now.Your marriage, and this goes for both of you, has to become more important than the perfect job, the perfect education, etc. And I'm a college teacher, so I understand the importance of a college education. And still, I'm advising you to put your marriage first instead.

Thanx lilac,

 

It's not harsh.  After I posted that message my husband called his work and found out that he might be getting a promotion as early as today (7-27) and he won't be working overnight anymore.  As crazy as it sounds, we're both going to school to try and make more time for our family.  He and I need to talk to each other more, but when I try, he doesn't seem very receptive.  About the only time it works for us is right before he leaves for work.  Not the best time.

 

Sigh, maybe I'll take all my books he's reading and hid them (as well as  the TV remotes) so all we have to do is talk and spend time with each other.  Hmm. . . . I'll ponder that one today.

 

Thanx again.

 
July 27, 2005, 10:24 am CDT

"Forget" to pay the cable bill!

Quote From: rayvinfive

Thanx lilac,

 

It's not harsh.  After I posted that message my husband called his work and found out that he might be getting a promotion as early as today (7-27) and he won't be working overnight anymore.  As crazy as it sounds, we're both going to school to try and make more time for our family.  He and I need to talk to each other more, but when I try, he doesn't seem very receptive.  About the only time it works for us is right before he leaves for work.  Not the best time.

 

Sigh, maybe I'll take all my books he's reading and hid them (as well as  the TV remotes) so all we have to do is talk and spend time with each other.  Hmm. . . . I'll ponder that one today.

 

Thanx again.

Just kidding. Ask and you shall receive. It sounds like things are turning around for the two of you and that you have an opportunity now to really get to work on your marriage. The two of you need a date night. Get a sitter once a week and leave the house: no television, no books, no internet, no nothing but the two of you and whatever fun activity or environment can spark conversation and get the two of you relating to each other as best friends and lovers. Good luck. Sounds like things are looking up.

 
July 27, 2005, 3:02 pm CDT

whats wrong with me?

i am never in the mood for sex. i have a very handsome husband.i don't get the urges like i should. i am numb.i can go for weeks, months without ever having the urge. is there anyone else that feels the same way?
 
July 28, 2005, 12:28 pm CDT

Forget about the cable bill!!!

Quote From: lilacmess

Just kidding. Ask and you shall receive. It sounds like things are turning around for the two of you and that you have an opportunity now to really get to work on your marriage. The two of you need a date night. Get a sitter once a week and leave the house: no television, no books, no internet, no nothing but the two of you and whatever fun activity or environment can spark conversation and get the two of you relating to each other as best friends and lovers. Good luck. Sounds like things are looking up.

Lilac,

 

I just got a message from my husband, he starts his new position today!!!!

 
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