I have a situation where my partner is the better looking of the two of us. The girls think he is the king man to have at their side. My partner draws the line but his infectious personality lures in the women. Women thinking that he would change back for the right woman.
We have one mutual friend that has been his friend for years before I came into the picture. My partner knew her before he declared his gayness. She sent him love letters and lingerie in the mail that he denied ever receiving them. To get her to back down of her over flirtation and need to be at his side.
She came back into my partners life 6 months after he and I declared our relationship status. She again started all that flirtation back up. Messages on the voicemail that are very sexuality explicit. Always needing hugs and to be held. She goes as far as to push herself onto my partner and I when unexpected.
Where I have the problem is that my partner will not show physical affection for me in public due to gay issues. We are completely out but we feel we don't want to offend anyone by showing we are a couple. So many times I would love to hold his hand, dance with him at the local dances, and be a partner to him just the way a heterosexual partnership would work.
This girl keeps going over the edge and I am tired of having to repeatly hug her and tired of the all the sex chat that she wants to do with my partner and I. My partner thinks it's harmless. I was suppose to be gone this week and if I was a woman I would think there was an affair going on but trust my partner 100%. I told my partner I bet she calls daily if not hourly knowing I am away before I left. She grabbed a hold of my partner at the dance and said over his shoulder while holding him. "While the cat's away, the mice will play and you are the cat". I felt so offended because I already feel she tries to lure him in that way. Her constant phone calls and my partner seems to get all perky when talking with her.
In public she is holding my partner's hand, always hugging him, and practically throwing himself at him. At the casino if she gets a win she turns, gets up and hugs him. I don't see why she has to do that everytime she wins. It appears to me that anything gives her a reason to keep holding him and her hands on him.
My partner and I raise two children. She shows up asking "Where's her children?" "What's my kids up to". always referring to the children as her own. She brings the kids expensive gifts each visit. Over stepping the boundaries of behaviour = reward. The kids love her because of that fact.
My reason for my email is that because it's my partner's decision not to show physical affection in public, why can this girl always hang off my partner. Holding his hand, Walking arm and arm with him, meanwhile I am walking on the other side of her like I am his friend only. I feel so hurt that she is aloud to do that with him and I am the true partner who isn't aloud. I feel our physical and emotional connection with each other is limited and this chick reminds me that I am different and takes advantage of the fact that I can't show public affection by doing things that make it look like I am the odd ball out. I know I am jealous, I know we are gay, but she really steps over the line and my partner doesn't see it.
Any advice for me?
