Ugh, I just completed my post and when I went to post it "poof" it was gone!!!! Let me get out now how much I dislike this new system and that I think they need to do something about fixing this!! <Smooths hair, sits back and goes to try this again>. You'd think after the two weeks it took them to do this (that we had to suffer and wait for it to come back) that a much better job would have been done. But anyway.........
Porn is a tough subject and it raises strong views. I think that this may be a subject that we are going to have to be adult about and have to be mature enough to say that people are going to have to "agree to disagree". You can put your points out there but when it comes to pretty much jamming ideas down each other's throats...that's a bit too much.
I'm one of the women who doesn't have a problem with porn (as long as it's not kiddie porn!!). I am not threatened by it an ounce. I am secure in myself, in my b/f and in our relationship. In this particular relationship, I am more the one who brings up wanting to get the video or the book. I do not think porn is wrong in a relationship if both parties are in agreement. Porn is an occasional addition to our sex life, just as sex toys or sexy outfits are.
Men are visually stimulated, women are emotionally and mentally stimulated. As I spent the two weeks at work crying over the message boards being gone, we got on this topic. An interesting point was brought up. How many women are reading Harlequins or such romance novels? They tend to have some pretty detailed sex scenes. Since women are stimulated mentally, does this then constitute cheating in the same way porn does? Just a thought.......
Now as far as having the courage to be not be ashamed of what's going on and be able to leave a message on my answering machine as to what I'm doing.....I don't leave a message on my machine saying "I'm going shopping" or "I'm cooking dinner" anymore then I'm leaving one that says "I'm having incredible sex with 'J' at the moment, so leave a message". If a friend calls and asks what I was doing, I'll tell her....and depending on the friend, it could even include that we watched a porn. I'm not ashamed of it but I don't give out details of my sex life to everyone and that's why I wouldn't leave it on my machine.
Before our lives were so rudely interrupted on these boards, someone had asked me why I was on the boards as most people come for advice. I had posted my reply on the same day they took the boards down, so I'll reply again. I was on the Oprah boards originally for the on-line journal and found the message boards. I received many "thank you's" for my advice and one person asked me to come over here and post because she thought I could help. I'm yet to ask for advice - I just try to help out in any way that I can. I use the same name on the Oprah boards, so you can see my posts over there too.
