Topic : 11/24 Great School Debate

A few years ago, when my son was given a state santioned intelligence test through the public schools, my son's  6th grade Math teacher commented about how exceptional he was in Math ( he tested in the gifted range in Math and superior in Science). He has ADHD and his  handwriting is atrocious. So, often he refuses to write with pencil and paper and refuses to hand write his homework assignments.   She commented that he was doing complicated 3 and 4 step math problems in his head that even she could not decipher, although he was correct.  What she was saying was that he was so far ahead of her, even she could not answer his questions, he had stumped even the gifted Math teachers.

What I disagree with on Dr. Phil's argument, is that  not all teachers, even with Master's Degrees are qualified to teach all kids. The public school system only knows one way and that  is to try to knock all square pegs into round holes. When that doesn't happen, they blame the parents and give up on them. My son is one of those square pegs that refused to be knocked into a round hole.  He is now doing great learning at home through K12.com and OHVA. There are teachers with  Mastter's Degrees, gifted teachers and teachers with specialized degrees on the other end of the computer or phone line if he has a question or needs them. I also have  structured Teachers Books and have my own college tech books( I have 3 years of college education and kept all of my books) which he is learning on his own at the age of 15.

I strongly  DISAGREE that kids have to "learn to deal" with bullying,  embarrassment,  depression, rich kid cliques, drugs, alcohol, guns, sex  and a whole myriad of other peer pressure issues  in public schools in order to be "socialized."

I am NOT a lawyer but, from what I gathered after I went to hslda.org to look up ALL 50 state laws on home schooling. The ONLY states were this unschooling family might have a legal right to home school like this (no specific courses taught, testing, qualifications, approval, and/or record keeping needed) are: Alabama, Alaska, Idaho, Indiana, Kansas, Mississippi, New Jersey, Oklahoma, and Texas. 

Unless this family lives in one of these states....how can they legally be home schooling their kids. Again, I am not sure what state they live in.  

Oh, and I could even offer evidence as such. How many times have we heard, "I cannot wait until school starts. The kids are driving me crazy!"" 

So, seems there are lazy parents on BOTH sides huh? 

"I am first, going to assume that your definition of uneducated is describing someone who has not gone to college." 

"Secondly, in answer to your question, home educated students’ test scores remain between the 80th and 90th percentiles, whether their mothers have a college degree or did not complete high school. Remarkably, students taught at home by mothers who never finished high school score a full 55 percentile points higher than public school students from families of comparable educational backgrounds." 

I am a single mom of two boys, 13 and 20.  We are surivors of domestic violence and abuse.  My family didn't approve of me leaving my now ex-husband and because of the therapy my boys and went through, abuse from my own childhood came up and now my boys and I have become out casts of my family. 

It has been over ten years since I have seen any of my siblings, and five years since I have seen my father. 

We are shut-ins, my boys don't have a man to use as a role model.

I have not dated since my ex-husband, and I don't think it would be fair for me to date giving how our life history is.  No man in his right mind would want a relationship with me.

My 13 year old son and I both live on social security and ssi, because of the nature of the abuse we went through from my ex-husband.

We live in a very violent neighborhood, and can't get out.  When my son's bike was stolen and I made a police report, the police advised me that I should move out of the neighborhood.  I wish we could.

The advice I need is for my 13 year old son regarding schooling.

Ever since my son was in the first grade he has hated school, and ever since the first grade my son will honestly throw up every morning.  He will throw up at home, he will throw up at school.  Because of the stress of bullies, he has cronic diahera. 

If I let him stay home after throwing up, he smiles and acts perfectly normal.  If he throws up at school and I have to go to get him and bring him home he is perfectly fine and there is nothing wrong.  It makes it hard to tell when he really is sick.

He has had several complete examinations from doctors who can't find anything wrong with him.

The day after ever school break is when it is the worse for him, and our battle gets intense.

I have had to resort in calling the police to help me to get my son to go to school.

I am exhausted, and I can't fight him to go anymore.  I feel like a failure because my son is winning the battle about school.  All because of the bullies at school.

Last Easter he woke up to find his glasses broken, and wanted me to let him use his broken glasses as an excuse to not let him go to school.  We have medicaid and it takes a month before new glasses to come in, so I couldn't.  I did write a note for the school and I explained to them what happened with his glasses.  He can't see very well without them.

In the note I asked them if they had any large print text books that he could use until his new glasses came in the would really be appericiated, also if he should have any head aches, they had my permission to give him some Tylenol.

An hour later my 13 year old son comes home with a big grin on his face and said the school had sent him home because they didn't have any large print text books and they told him he could stay home until his glasses came in.  He also said that they would send him his home work home with him.

I called the school to verify what my 13 year old son had told me, but I was told that everyone I needed to speak with were busy conducting interviews and that I would have to leave a voicemail message, which I did.  I left a very detailed voicemail message and also left my phone number.  Nobody returned my phone call.  The next day I called the school, again I was told the samething and I again I left a very detailed message including my phone number.  This went on for a whole week, and still I did not recieve a call back from the school.  After the second week I gave up on the school and just asumed my son might be telling the truth, but wondered about his homework.

Three weeks later the school finally calls me, but not to turn my voicemail messages.  It was the attendence office letting me know my son had not been in school for a while.  I told the attendence office everything, and not long the vice principal who is also incharge of the special education finally called me and made a home visit and came up with a plan to try independent study for the rest of the school year.

The last day of school, both my boys and myself went to my 13 year old son's school and dropped off his homework.  He turned in everything.

When we got his last report card, he got all zeros and "E"s with a note saying that he failed because he never turned in his work.

What am I suppose to do?

Any advice?

If you had to deal with this, what would you do?

Would you still choose traditional schooling?

Homeschooling?

Of would you go with unschooling, which I am looking into, am not sure if they have such a program in my neighborhood.

I can't help him with his homeschooling, I don't know a lot of his math, I am not a teacher.

What can I do?

Please, I am serious, what can I do.

My 13 year old's education is at a very high risk here.

Not for homeschooled or private schooled children.

Public school children of course have to meet all the state testing requirements as well as NCLB requirements.

This in no way adversely affected my son's ability to get into the college of his choice.

Why is that Public school proponents all think that parents that  home-school their children are all uneducated morons that don't have a clue as to what they are doing? Nothing could be further from the truth.

Many of us have a college education AND degrees. I am also a single mother.   Why would you think that only degreed teachers are only qualified to teach other people's children.  Where did you get the idea that all teachers have Master's degrees and can teach children of all backgrounds and learning styles? That's a huge myth in society perpetuated by ignorance.

As far as sizes of schools are concerned I would agree that in the classroom less is more, but I have  evolved in how I feel about the size of the school itself. Having homeschooled 7 years prior to my son choosing to go to high school I believed that if we had to be in school small would be my first choice, but as I interviewed friends and family that changed. In a small or VERY small school you either fit in or you don't. You may have only one or two classes per grade and that intimate a setting may not be best for a growing mind and ego. I actually found to my surprise that the population of 1600 in the high school my son attends makes more sense to us. There are 30 plus clubs alone to suit any and all interests and if it doesn't exist someone will start one. Not only do they have them, but everyone is required to find one through a process aof regular trial days till you find what fits. You meet people you may have otherwise not known in your day to day schedule. I was pleased for this program and know that in the smaller schools this is either not offered or limited.

Also Bullying exists at all school levels, but it sure hurts more in a small setting if you don't have many allies.

States and the Federal government do not require testing of private school students, private schools do not have to meet the requirements of NCLB. So why should they make these demands of homeschoolers?

Your tax money pays for a public school education, that is why taxpayers have the right to demand that public schools be accountable.

Tax money is not used for private school tuition or homeschools therefore you have no right to DEMAND that private or homeschooled students be accountable to you.

Parents who send their children to private schools have the right to demand that the schools be accountable to them because they pay the tuition. If they are not satisfied with the schools performance they are free to send their children elsewhere or homeschool.

Unless you want to provide homeschoolers with tax money you have no right to demand they be accountable to you or  anyone else.

Considering how well homeschoolers score on test and how easy it is for them to get into college, I think you have ample evidence that they are doing a good job.