Topic : 11/30 Spoiled and Entitled

Any person can open a phone book and contact a local charity. If that charity isn't what a person likes, they can get a referral to another one.

Teens are definitely difficult to buy for, but I still wouldn't buy expensive electronic gifts for them (I don't buy it for my two children). DVD's and DVD players (now quite inexpensive), books, stationary, fun pillows, CD's and personal CD players and clothing make great gifts. Todays teens shouldn't have so many electronic gadgets; they are spending too much time in the house in front of screens and not enough time involved in healthier activities. It will not KILL a teen if s/he doesn't live as the Jones w/ all the latest "stuff." It will, though, make them stronger and give them the desire to better their situations as they age.

Hopefully, those teens old enough to hold jobs and help out their famiies, are doing so. Teens can give back just as well as adults can.

I'm a teacher and I reallly applaud the efforts the Dr. Phil show is taking to help make the holidays a little more joyous for underprivileged kids.  I would also like to add to what Robin was saying about setting the tone for the holidays.

I teach in a school where over 50% of our population comes from some degree of poverty.  We brace ourselves each year for the behavior issues we know we're going to have at the holiday times.  People who have never been in a school like mine may brush this off as kids being excited, preparing for the break and in general need of a vacation.

However, what is often going on is an extension from their home lives.  We all know that the holidays can be an incredibly stressful time.  Now imagine that you have to make a decision between paying your electric bill or buying food for your family.  It has got to be very difficult for a parent to know that they can't possibly buy a simple gift for their kids.  I often wonder how these parents explain Santa to the really young ones.  And how must the children feel when they see other kids playing with new toys or even trying on the socks that their old aunt sent them.

There is also an issue of being off from school for two weeks.  For many of our students, the free breakfast and lunch they receive at school are their only meals.  Without school, they have nothing to eat.

This all contributes to a powder keg of anxiety and stress in their households.  Children (and many adults) don't know how to deal with that kind of pressure, so they act out.  This doesn't make it acceptable and they certainly don't get away with it, but I (and my colleagues) try to remain empathetic, talk to the kids and give them a chance to make a better choice.

Toys for Tots is an exceptional program that brings a little joy to the lives of kids whose days are spent wondering about things that children shouldn't even know to worry about.  I encourage everyone to reach out this Christmas season and help someone. 

My school donates holiday food to many of our families--the assistant principals are even the ones who deliver it!  We also collect toys, games, books and clothing to donate to those families in need.  Sometimes all it takes is a small gesture to improve another life.

I tell my students a story about how living life is like throwing a pebble in a pond (no, it's not an original story from me).  I explain that every action we take sends out ripples and it's our choice whether we will send out a gentle ripple or a tidal wave.  Before making decisions I believe we should think about the frog sitting on the lily pad in the middle of that pond.  Through our actions we can choose to either sink him with a tidal wave or provide him with a nice, gentle ride.  So I'm going to end this post with the words from a poster I made and hung right next to my door in my classroom. . . .

. . . .Remember the frog.

Happy Holidays to everyone!

Michelle

Well, for all those spoiled brats....  Money does not grow in trees. It's very hard for us parents to bring food to the table and to put a roof over our children's head for the first 18 years of their life, or even longer.  I am a 52 yr old mother of a 19 year old and I have spoiled her as much as I have been able to.  She is my only child and I want to give her everything I did't have, and more.  But I would never go out and sell my body or shop lift to give her what I don't have.  My daugher knows that when I say no, I mean NO.  She understands that I can't afford what she wants or needs, if there's no extra money after the bills have been paid. 

For those parents who don't want to or know how to say no when it's not possible.... Just say NO!!! - It's more important to give your children values and teach them how to become productive and successful adults.  We can not let our children take over our role as parents or control us.  Our children are intelligent people, They are full of energy, but they don't know what to do with it..... Let's show them how to set goals and dreams.  Let's teach them how to love and respect themselves and others.  Some times using taugh love it's the only way.   We are supossed to be strong and inforse rules for them, because they need them.  Whithout that, they get lost, and they can not find their way.  We are thier guides until they can think for themselves and can make their own desitions.  We are responsible for what our children become as adults.  Oh yes, and they will come back later to tell us,  "Thank you" or "It was your fault"

I am very proud of myself as a mother.  I know have done a good job at raising my daughter.  There is nothing she does not share with me or advice she does not ask of me before she makes an important desition.  She loves me and respects me, and tells me that I'm her heroe .  I have always made sure that I am her mother first and when she needs me, I am her best friend.  Good luck to all those parents and children that are having difficulties at home.

God Bless

CB