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Topic : 12/04 Heroin Twins: The Intervention, Part 3

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Created on : Friday, December 01, 2006, 03:19:25 pm

Author : DrPhilBoard1

Dr. Phil continues his work with twin sisters who are addicted to heroin and crack cocaine and were spiraling out of control. A few days into her detox, Sarah begins to emerge from her haze of drug use and painful withdrawal symptoms. Is she committed to the work involved with getting clean? Dr. Phil questions their mother, Cindy, about her own history of alcohol use and how she is sabotaging Tecoa’s sobriety and the health of her unborn baby. Then, Dr. Phil tracks down the sisters’ long-lost stepfather, Perry. They say his disappearance from their lives played a significant role toward their decline into drug use and prostitution. How does Perry explain his absence from their lives, and does his appearance bring closure for Sarah and Tecoa? As the twins begin to take their first steps toward a new life, Dr. Phil informs them that their paths of sobriety will be separate. Will they agree to go to different rehab centers to learn how to stand on their own two feet? Share your thoughts here.

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hayleyr

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December 4, 2006, 5:21 pm PST

THANKYOU

Quote From: afraid

ans thats reading post from people acting like they have no heart,and seeing all this finger pointing in every direction,WHAT GOOD IS IT TO TRY TO PLACE BLAME ANYWHERE EXCEPT ON THE PEOPLE SUPPLYING THE DAMN DRUGS TO OUR CHILDREN IN THE FIRST PLACE? for with out the drugs there for our children to get there hands on we would not have this terrible problem,OPEN YOUR EYES, mom dad and dr phil did not put the drugs on the very streets our children play on,the twins didnt put them there as well in one way or another we all have the same thing to fear as the twins mother had to face sooner or later, we must address the fact of just where in the hell are all these deadly drugs coming from and what can we all do to put a stop to it, if you have children you are not as safe as you think, i know im not,! what we all saw here was the true results of what is happening to our children, it isnt just the twins,these people all need a big thank you for placing there lives in the view of the public to show every one what it is really like, we saw the truth,no acting no stunt people,no special efects,it is very real, just amagin seeing your owne child come home looking like the twins looked,my god,thankfuly dr phil was able to help them, we all arnt so lucky there isnt enough of dr phil to go around, so OPEN YOUR EYES TO THE REALTY OF WHAT THIS SHOW STOOD FOR, it wasnt about two cocain smoking herion shooting hookers out having a good time using every one they knew or seeing just how many people they could hurt as a prank, it was a story about two children who had problems and were able to find druds on the very streets they lived on ,and very deadly drugs at that, bet the kids parents that was selling them herion hasnt got any idea there kid is a herion dealear nether,buit there kid supplies deadly drugs to teens, hell dosent that infact make the dealers parents guilty as well? yeah in a way it do, but its not there fault there kid is a dealer, or is it why is the kid dealing drugs? i guess my point is if you see a drug deal going on call the police dont be scared to they can handle problems like that, if the kid down the street is selling pot turn his ass in, do your part to make the streets a safe place for your children once again, as of now i wouldnt let my kid go around the block by him self, AND YES I TURN IN DRUD DEALERS ,I KNOW WHEN I SEE 15 PEOPLE RUN UP TO A CAR STOPPING ON THE STREERT THERE NOT GIVING DIRECTIONS TO A LOST MOTOREST EVERY 25 SEC OF THE DAY OR NIGHT, ARNT THAT MANY LOST PEOPLE IN THE ENTIRE COUNTRY, MUCH LESS IN ONE NEIGHBORHOOD,

NOTHING ANGERS ME MORE THAN DRUG DEALERS. THEY ARE ABBUSERS PIMPS AND MURDERERS. THE PROBLEM IS, THAT WITH ALL THIS ATENTION ON MONEY CARS WOMAN AND POWERE ON TV ,VIDEOS. CHILDREN BECOME OBBSESSED. THEY WANT TO BE THE TOUGH GANSTER LIKE 50 CENT AND HAVE ALL THE MONEY AND RESPECT. BECAUSE REALLY, DRUG DEALERS ARE OUR CHILDREN NOW OR IN THE FURTURE. IT IS SO GLAMORIZED THE STREET LIFE ON TV. ALSO THE OBBSESSION WITH CLOTHS , JEWLERY CELL PHONES ETC, THAT KIDS WANT THIS POWERE AND POPULARITY AND THINK ITS COOL. SOME CHILDREN ARE RAISED AROUND IT AND DONT KNOW ANY DIFFERENT, SOME DO IT TO BE COOL, OR SUPPORT THEIR HABITS. THE POINT BEING OBVIOUSLY THEIR IS A WAR ON DRUGS NOW , BUT IF WE CAN CHANGE THE IDOLS AND MINDS OF OUR CHILDREN WE CAN PREVENT THEM FROM DEALING DRUGS. BECAUSE WITHOUT FURTURE DRUG DEALERS THEIR WILL SOON BE NO MORE DRUG DEALERS AND TO ME , THE GANSTER DRUG LIFE IS SO GAMORIZED IN POP CULTURE, CHILDREN ARE MORE INFLUENCED BY MTV THAN THE PRESIDENT. KIDS HEAR EVERY DAY THAT DRUGS ARENT COOL, YET THEY HEAR LITTLE ABOUT THE PEOPLE WHO SELL THEM AND THERE FORE THEY ACTUALLY ADMIRE THEM .SICK!!!

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rcbaird

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upset

December 4, 2006, 5:22 pm PST

Dad Relationship

I am very bothered by the conversation Dr. Phil encouraged with the Twins when they spoke with their step-dad. My father left us when I was five (5) years old, I have NEVER talked to him since. The way I see it is, "it is his loss". I could have ended up taking drugs, prostituting myself, having children as a child myself, etc. I did not though. We had NO money when I was a child, my mother didn't have enough money to pay her mortgage, let alone buy milk. I can't believe you are letting the Twins use him as their "excuse" or "scapegoat" - IF only he hadn't abandoned them. I get that they were children, but they aren't anymore. They need to take ownership for their lives and the paths they are on! I paid my own way through college, have been working since I was in 8th grade. My life has been FAR from easy, but I did it. I do NOT believe in blaming anyone else for my poor judgement. Don't get me wrong, I feel for these girls, but GIVE THEM SOME POWER. Power comes from realizing YOU are in control of your own life --- your daddy that left you when you were a child does NOT have control over your life any longer, stop giving your Power back to him. He screwed up, it is his loss, but don't spend your life blaming him or making excuses for your behavior "if only he hadn't left us we wouldn't have gotten to this place in life" ---- that is a load of crap.

Dr. Phil has told children before on previous shows that if they are in an unhealthy relationship with their parent(s) that maybe they need to walk away from the relationship. Granted, I don't think I would EVER be able to "walk away" from my own children, but they certainly do NOT need to make him their excuse for the rest of their lives to continue to screw up their own. The ONLY person they have to blame NOW is themselves.

If anything, they should have met with their step-dad just to have some closure, but certainly NOT to place the blame back on him and his wife. Come on... take ownership. 13 year old girls think they are mature enough to make adult decisions even though we all know they are far from being adults... well educate them! Teach them to make GOOD decisions. Do NOT teach them to place blame on their parents when they make a HORRIBLE decision. Teach them self-worth and to pick themselves up, dust themselves off and realize they are better than this!

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nipper357

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December 4, 2006, 5:23 pm PST

Beginning of a hopeful road

I was very surprised to see how well both the girls are doing, even seperated. Thanks to Dr. Phil and his staff for all they've done to save the twins so far. But all in all its up to the girls to do the work , to get and stay off drugs. I know because my husband got hooked and couldn't stay clean, so I am now a Widow. Good luck girls, I'm pulling for you. I wish I had Dr. Phil for my husband back then. nipper357

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new2unme

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December 4, 2006, 5:26 pm PST

12/04 Heroin Twins: The Intervention, Part 3

Quote From: freespirit7

It was very clear to me that it was not just the father that was involved in these 2 young girls down spiral but the mother also. The mother chose to use the children in Divorce against the father.

The mother's questions to the girls after the meeting with their father was, "DID HE BLAME ME" , "WAS THERE TALK ABOUT ME AND HIM", "YOU'RE NOT GOING TO KEEP THE STUFFED DOG'S"

This is telling about what the father and step-mother tried to explain in their interview. The mother made it difficult for them to be influential in their recovery. The mother would not answer questions they had about how the girls were, the mother minimized what the girls were getting into.

The stuffed animal gift from the father was touching. We all enjoy hugging stuffed soft animals. I do and I am 47. It is too bad that the girls got the feeling that the mother felt threatened by the gift. The girls are not stupid. They would pick up on the negative comments they heard from their mother about their father and feel loyalty issues.

It was clear the father felt lost as to how to handle the situation he was met with years before. He had a lot of pain and did not have the tools or skill to make the "right" decision. On top of this he had not power or say.

This is what can happen to children who are used as pawns by one parent to get back at the other parent, in divorce. We need to set things up in society to help these children has access to both parents in an environment free from contamination by the other parent.

Girls, know that your dad obviously loves you. It was written all over his face. He made mistakes and is still lost as to what to do. He could use help in balancing his parenting between all of his children. We all struggle as parents when we have more than one child. Parents seem to relate better to one than another, or their styles are similar making the relationship smoother. These 2 people are just not educated.

You did not deserve to be a pawn in divorce. You did not choose it. You deserved to be loved by both parents and not used. It was their problem, get educated so you do not repeat it.

Take care

AMEN! I was so dumb foudned when I heard the questions Mom was asking. I do nto blame Dad and wish he had sent cards to let them know he was thinking of them, however based on the way Mom behaves she woudl probably throw them out. Oh......bet if he gave them cash it would have been OK. I am 35 and the some of the best gifts my husband has given me have been fluffy stuffed animals. If you don't want little girl presents grow up and act like adults. Can we really imagine being in his shoes? Dad, "Girls its bad to smoke and drink." Mom, "Its normal teenage experimentation." Thsi Mom clearly makes be angry. Come on people.......she drank with her preganant daughter! She spent too much time being a friend instead of a parent.

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noomama

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December 4, 2006, 5:28 pm PST

happy

Okay so here's a story that I can relate to and appreciate. I am a recovering, herion/crack addict. Watching these girls was like watching myself out there homeless, prostitution, drugs. No one quite understands it when u explain it, but when u do a show like this it opens peoples eyes. Addiction is a nasty thing and very real. Even the most beautiful & most successful people can fall into it's trap. Although it gives u a pretty good idea of what goes on, the other stuff u have to deal with is much worse. Sometimes people just need that ONE person to care, to help. In their case it was Dr. Phil! Although our families love us and care about us, sometimes we just need that outside influence to give us that sort of wake up call. In my case my savior was my baby daughter! I was devestated when i found out i was pregnant. I mean i was a homeless jukie! I was not ready, but God had other plans for me. He sent me my angel! I changed my life and got clean and sober and have been now for a little over 2 years. It was not easy I went to jail several times and went to dozens of detox/rehabs. you can't go just because someone wants u too and succed. It's when you decide that u want to do it for yourself, for your sanity...to get you life back as Dr. Phil put it.. right on!There is hope out there, and there are people who care. The trick is caring enough about yourself to stick to it. Although withdrawals are bad, this early part of recovery is the easiest. it's staying clean that's the challenge. It's an everyday struggle for me, and I still have some damage I caused to deal with. I will say that although it is hard to remain clean, I can truely say that I am happy..... finally. I wish u girls luck and like to thank Dr. Phil for sincerely wanting to help and using that tough love, it may seem harsh but I believe it's the best approach! :)

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freddynv

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December 4, 2006, 5:31 pm PST

heroin twins

recovery is a daily process. It's ahrd for me to nothave hope for these girls. I lve to stay drug free everyday. I also have help. My help is Jesus. He is the one who initially saved me from the addiction. I was so tired if living the life of drug and alcohol addiction, in desperation I asked God to forgive me and help me. It's been two years now that I have been sober. There are always times when I want to get high. After you have been addicted for so long you have dreams about being high or getting high. At least I did. I would wake up craving to have it. I took it one day at a time. For some reason it was easier to say no to the drugs than it was for alcohol. I fetl like I needed something to help me when I was feeling down. I guess that why I was an addict. I tried to fix the problem with drugs and alcohol instead of dealing with it. Thats going to be the toughest part realizing being sober and trying to find something or sombody to talk to when they feel like the want to use. Im also glad the girls had high spirits when the realized they were going to be split up. That was probably the hardest thing, but in order for them to deal with there own issues they have to be alone and depend only on themselves to get clean. They cant hold eachother responsible for the tohers actions any longer if the want to stay clean. My prayer is that they keep up good spirits about getting and staying clean and I hope that the girls will support eachother. I hope that they also realize that if one of them happen to relapse that the other one needs to protect herself so that she doesnt also relapse. They have to protect themselves. So I pary that they are strong enogh not ot follow the other if that happens. In Jesus' name. Amen

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occhrissie

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December 4, 2006, 5:35 pm PST

Dad gave up and they just followed

Quote From: new2unme

Can you believe how they acted over the dogs. Dad....I am so sorry that you will have to go hom eand find out on TV that they trashed your present. To the girls.........your Mom failed miserably at teaching you respect. I realize that becuase you have been addicts since you were 15 or so that possibly you did not mature emotionally and grow up, however I have an 11 yr. old that knows better than to act in this manner. Mom........you are a piece of work refering to your ex-husband as PUSSY WHIPPED! The way I see it he is protecting and securing the family he has now. MOM>>>>>>>blame yourself a little instead of piling up on the step dad.

would fight to no end for my daughter. If they were with a parent that was neglectful or harmful I would fight to get them. The new wife cared about her own child and not what was best for those 2 girls or what was best for her husband. To say there was nothing they could do is just stupid. He could have called on a daily basis to let them know they were loved how would that hurt your unborn child. To the cold hearted woman he married I would bet money that if your daughter ever had a drug problem, and it is possible. you would not do to her what you and your husband did to those two girls. I don't know how they sllep at night. I would be so ashamed and so guilty at what I had done. At least Mom was there.

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gemmajoy

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December 4, 2006, 5:38 pm PST

I agree totally

I agree totally that Dr. Phil was too hard on Perry and Rene. I watched my nephew try to sabotage my brother's second marriage. My brother and wonderful, patient, caring sister-in-law tried for years, over and over again to guide and nurture my nephew as he abused alcohol and drugs. My ex-sister-in-law did everything in her power to thwart them at every turn, excusing his addictions, until he finally died in a drunk-driving accident. Perry and Rene, good for you for protecting your young daughter from these women who admitted that they would be causing trouble, using or not. I feel so sorry that Perry and Rene will see how they and their mother ridiculed their gifts and the feelings behind the giving. Mom should be ashamed.

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nipper357

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December 4, 2006, 5:39 pm PST

first to say

Quote From: freespirit7

Mourning a loss, or grieving has many phases. One of them is anger. In this stage we blame. We have to go through this stage to heal. It is that simple as to why people blame others. We have to look at the truth of the situation for us, that caused us pain. In looking at the truth, we see an impact of some sort. Someone or something did something to us and we felt......or did......In the end, after we go through the pain we start to heal and take responsibility for our behaviour. I personally feel it is very important to look at who did what to us so we can protect ourselves again. If we have a family member, friend, boss, acquaintance abusing us we need to see it for what it is and protect ourselves in a number of ways. Blame to me is a healing thing. I think people get freaked out about blame because none of us are blamless. One day we will be blamed and we do not want that.

May I just say you are absolutely right in what you said. The twins and others like them have enough to deal with besides pointing fingers.

nipper357

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occhrissie

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December 4, 2006, 5:40 pm PST

12/04 Heroin Twins: The Intervention, Part 3

Quote From: new2unme

AMEN! I was so dumb foudned when I heard the questions Mom was asking. I do nto blame Dad and wish he had sent cards to let them know he was thinking of them, however based on the way Mom behaves she woudl probably throw them out. Oh......bet if he gave them cash it would have been OK. I am 35 and the some of the best gifts my husband has given me have been fluffy stuffed animals. If you don't want little girl presents grow up and act like adults. Can we really imagine being in his shoes? Dad, "Girls its bad to smoke and drink." Mom, "Its normal teenage experimentation." Thsi Mom clearly makes be angry. Come on people.......she drank with her preganant daughter! She spent too much time being a friend instead of a parent.

Mom made huge mistakes and she has plenty to be sorry for but Dad just doesn't care enough. I have a daughter and I can't imagine her Father or I EVER saying " There was just nothing I could do" If his wife would shut up and let him decide what he wanted he might do something right and show them the love a Father should. I feel sorry for his young daughter as well I would be ashamed to find out that my Father treated his children that way.

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