Topic : 01/04 "What I Want This Year!"

Luca should understand that the average woman needs a YEAR, not two months to shed baby weight.  Breast feeding helps, but even then, if you put on 30+ pounds, youre going to need time to get it off, or you'll put it back on and more.  C-sections cut thru abdominal muscles, so, i'm sure she's sore- makes crunches hard.  If she doesn't have the $ to get a "mommy make over"(breast lift after breast feeding combined with tummy tuck), her body just isn't going to look the same before she had 3 kids.  The more he pushes, the more she's going to resent him...the slower the weight comes off.  So he has more to gain by keeping his mouth shut.

Pregnancy can actually cause the muscles to separate in the tummy area. This gives the impression that the tummy is flabby. No amount of crunches, set-ups or food-control changes will make the muscle tissue go back together. That actually requires surgery.

 

And 2 months after??? Maybe he's just felling needy & this is an attention-getter?

What I want for this year is to get out of the situation I am in. 2006 was not one of my best years. I went through a lot of abuse. Now I live in a one room apartment. I don't have money for a bed so I sleep on a cement floor. I have one job but it does not pay the bills. I am looking for another job. But I don't hold out a lot of hope. There are not a lot of jobs in Havre, MT. I feel like I am in jail for something I did not do.  New Years Eve I actually counted out how many pain pills it would take to kill me.  I did not take them. I don't ask for handouts I work hard. Montana can be a very unforgiving place. The small towns here have among the highest suicide rates in the country. I injured my leg last week and I can't afford to go to a Doctor. Jobs don't offer health insurance. So Dr. Phil what do I do now.

get  my  life on track. I want to get out of debt and not spend money  foolishly. I want help for my shopping addiction. I went from drugs to shopping and I have been off drugs for more then ten years acctually its  ben since  my  divorce inm 83. Im afraid I am on the verge of homelessness and I have a good job  with  my son  costing me a fortune with court cost and  being incarcarated in juvinile hall and  me  trying to fell better  by shoping my life is one big  disaster. I just need help to get my life in order ond on track so my children will be  responsiblr adults in life.

 what i want this year is help!!! i want my stepson to face the fact that his mom is dead, and that he could not have done anything to change that. i want for him to stop using her death as an excuse to act very badly  and to realize that he still needs to do homework ,schoolwork and chores  and that life does go on. people are born they live and they die every day.  we mourn for a short time but then you have to live your life. the greatest  way to honor someone who has passed is to live your life to the fullest every day and don't waste a minute of time because that would not only be disrespectful to the dead but to your self as well it would "cheapen" yourself .  I have tried  to explain this to him and he just appears to go backwards  and is endangering his IB placement  because he has decided he does not wish to live with his dad and myself. he wants to live with his aunt. i have been through this situation before with my own niece and it ends extraordinarily bad!!! and i can't get that through her head either she thinks that we should just turn him over to her and everything would be just dandy. except that  she's on the road for months on end. like I said what I really want this year is help and I really need a lot of support that I'm not getting from anywhere!!!!!!  DR. PHIL PLEASE HELP!!!!

    What I want this year for myself is to be able to lose the " baby" weight from my 3 c-sections.  when I started having kids I weighed 165 lbs. now I weigh 267 and am quite down alot of the time. I just sent my oldest daughter back to the conservation corps in kentucky she's 20 and just got engaged to a 17 year old.  they are mentally about the same age and  they are in no hurry which I'm very hopeful about. my middle daughter  only lasted 17 days. so she's in the graveyard,  and I vist her about 2-3 times a year. and my youngest is 3 she is my hope. she's the light of my life. she is also the reason that I want to lose at least 100 lbs. and Quit smoking my problem is both of those things take a very good if not great support system and since I buried my mom and cremated my sister the year my third daughter was born, and my husband is a truck driver that's only home 2-3 days a week I literally have no one to count on. I can't even count on my stepson to watch his little sister while i go to the store. I need EXTREME HELP, PRAYER AND A BABYSITTER THAT WON'T HURT MY KIDS!!!!!!

 I AM REPLYING TO THE LETTER FROM GENNY2.  YOU WANT YOUR STEPSON TO FACE THE FACT HIS MOM IS DEAD-THAT HE CAN'T CHANGE THAT?  YOU WANT HIM TO STOP USING HER DEATH AS AN EXCUSE TO ACT BADLY; "PEOPLE ARE BORN, THEY LIVE AND THEY DIE EVERY DAY. WE MOURN FOR A SHORT TIME BUT THEN HAVE TO LIVE YOUR LIFE."  YOU FAILED TO SAY HOW OLD YOUR STEPSON WAS......WAS HIS AGE LEFT OUT OF THIS CONVERSATION INTENTIONALLY?
PERHAPS; HAVE YOU EVER THOUGHT THAT HE DOES NOT WANT TO LIVE WITH HIS FATHER AND YOU BECAUSE YOU WILL NOT LET HIM GRIEVE IN THE WAY HE HAS TO FOR HIS MOTHER?????  YOU ALSO NEVER MENTIONED; IS THIS AUNT HE WANTS TO LIVE WITH HIS MOTHERS SISTER?  IF SO, THAT WOULD MAKE ALOT OF SENSE ALSO-THAT WOULD MAKE HIM FEEL CLOSER TO HIS MOTHER!
I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, I WAS 13 WHEN MY MOTHER DIED.  I WAS IN THE 9TH GRADE; SHE PASSED IN FEBRARY AND I DID NOT ATTEND SCHOOL EXCEPT FOR MAYBE A MONTH AFTER THAT FOR THE REST OF THE YEAR!  CONSEQUENTLY, I FAILED THAT YEAR OF COURSE-BUT BY 10TH GRADE; THEY ALLOWED ME TO DOUBLE UP ON THE 2 COURSES THAT I FAILED, AND WAS BACK UP IN THE CLASS I BELONGED IN.  BOTTOM LINE IS, I CARRIED MY MOTHERS DEATH AROUND WITH ME UNTIL 2000; UNTIL I FINALLY GOT COUNSELING FOR IT!!!  MY MOTHER DIED IN 1970-I CARRIED THAT FOR 30 YEARS!  BECAUSE NOBODY BOTHERED TO GET ANY HELP FOR ME; NOBODY THOUGHT ENOUGH OF WHAT I MAY BE GOING THRU!!!
I JUST THINK YOU ARE SO WRONG IN WHAT YOU ARE DOING, AND HOW YOU ARE HANDLING THIS POOR KID-GROW UP; AND THINK OF HIM FOR A CHANGE-INSTEAD OF HOW YOU CAN CHANGE HIM!!!     INSTEAD; HELP HIM!