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Topic : 06/11 Mega Moochers

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Created on : Friday, January 05, 2007, 10:50:16 am
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 1/10/07) Dr. Phil takes on a different kind of moocher … the Mega Moocher! Not only do these extreme freeloaders refuse to work -- decades at a time -- but they expect you to support them and their entire family forever! Connie says her 33-year-old son, Richard, is so lazy and selfish that he actually found a way to put her out of her own home, so he could move his family of five in. Connie and her husband, Rick, say they have paid over $30,000 in the last 18 months to support Richard, and they have had enough. Is an eviction the only way to get him out? And can Connie live with the guilt, knowing it could leave her three grandchildren homeless as well? Then, Janelle wants her brother, Jeff, to stop mooching off their 91-year-old grandfather, who has been supporting him for 18 years. Jeff says he has no need to work because he doesn’t have kids. Will this be the day these guests put an end to their family members’ freeloading ways? Tell us what you think!

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June 11, 2007, 3:47 pm CDT

Give Me A Break

Quote From: cms4graphics

Having a family member with Asperberger's Syndrome, these "moochers" appear to have all the ingredients. Perhaps the show should have looked at how to help these individuals.

People suffering from Asperberger's syndrome see absolutely nothing wrong with their lifestyle because they can't! They are missing a key ingredient to social skills and living. They are quite happy with life as they know it.

The only syndrome these people suffer from is moocherites syndrome.
If you watch Dr Phil you should know that behind the scenes there is lots and lots of research done on people that appear on the show.
 
June 11, 2007, 3:49 pm CDT

BIL - MIL r mega moocher's

My brother in law (26) is also a big moocher.  He mooches not only off of my husband an I but his  other sibling's.  My mother in law is ill with emphasyma and can no longer work (not that she really ever did anyway)  My husband and his sibling's have supported her for 15+ year's.  She also collect's Social Security and a check from welfare along w/ food stamps.   My BIL resides with my MIL.  He will not work and sleeps most of his life away when he is not sleeping he is drugged up on my MIL sleeping pill's and beer.  Yes, he is also an addict!  MIL gives BIL every dime of her check for drug's and alcohol leaving her penniless for the month and unable to buy her medicine let alone any other neccesities (beer) they may need for the month.  So, needless to say MIL feel's that we should pay for her meds.  and all of their neccesities(beer).  We already pay the house payment all of the bill's and maintain yard ect.  My husband has started to drag my BIL to work with him so we can get something out of him.  Husband is fortunate enough to have his own biz. so that is not an issue.  If my husband didnt literally drag my BIL to work he wouldnt function at all.  My husband says he has to completly retrain him on every job because he is so whacked out on narcotics he cant seem to remember how to do his job efficiently.    He is more of a burden to say the least and does not deserve a job with my husband.  I believe that my BIL should go get a 9-5 like a normal person and not just expect a job and a paycheck (which no doubt goes on more pills ect.) .  I tell my husband he is not helping him but hindering him as does his mother whom refuses to boot the bil out of the house.  She says if he goes, so does she.  She has no where to go and not a dime to her name.  Not to mention , she is also sick and on oxygen.  I say (screaming) emotional blackmail, verbal manipulation? something is def. wrong with that picture.  She know's we will not put her out on the street because of her med. issues.  Don't think I dont want to though!  She has recently informed us our children- her grandchildren are not welcome there.  They help us maintain the yard, garden,  and take care of our animal's (we own exotic bird's).  If they didnt it would never get done although BIL is quite capable of cutting the grass or pulling weed's or just simply picking up his beer can's.  Did I mention we own this house and the 8 acres it sits on and we also pay all of the bill's.  I go to the house daily to take care of my bird's and my BIL comes around the corner and asked what I was doing to his bird's!!!!! on many occasion he has asked my children what they are doing on his property....  Talk about a sense of self- entitlement!  I just want him to leave- move out, go to the ymca or something he is 26 year's old and he is totally useless.  My children and I despise both their grandma and their uncle.  They are good kid's and dont deserve to be treated the way they have treated them.  It really makes me sick and is really becoming a burden in my marriage.  My husband's sibling's have finally stopped supporting my MIL because they were sickened by  the drug abuse, alcoholism, and  self serving issues.  The electric or water could be shut off and the bil would sleep while everyone is counting their pennies, and putting in extra hours to get her utilities turned back on.  It's not right!!!! I could go on and on with more example's but Im afraid I may bore you all to death...any suggestions for a peaceful resolution would be wonderful!!!! Thanks, God Bless, GoDiVa35
 
June 11, 2007, 3:56 pm CDT

Mega Moochers

I know this is a rerun.  I think I saw it the first time but now I have to put my 2 cents worth in.  Richard is a bum, but what about his wife/girlfriend.  Why isn't she also looking for a job and a place to live?  If she can't work, there is a welfare system in this country that will give most anything to almost anyone.  I know, i work for one.  They could've helped by getting food stamps and if they needed day care to find jobs, that's probably available also.  Let's face it.  They didn't want to.  They had the soft life and no responsibilities.  Chances are "Mom" cared for the kids.  She said when he was unemployed all he wanted to do is party.  Come on guys, get off your asses!  Mom--don't let them back in whatever you do.  Step-dad:  Back up Mom and make sure she follows through.  Don't worry, they will find a way to survive!  They could even get a cash grant and maybe housing--but again, they will have to make an effort!
 
June 11, 2007, 3:56 pm CDT

consider yourself lucky

Quote From: dagace

I can't do anything but laugh when I watch the show on moochers.........Get a LIFE PEOPLE
That is easy to say...  If I were the MOOCHEE, it would be very easy to tell the MOOCHER to get th ____ out!  When you feel helpless and watching your mother get mooched off of, it brings on a rage that you just can't shake.
 
June 11, 2007, 4:01 pm CDT

What about...?

I kinda watched bits and pieces of the show. What I didn't get, was a sense of their psychological/emotional self? What if they're depressed? Socially anxious? Feel worthless, hopeless, etc? I don't know if they ever expressed this, but basically what if they are this way because they don't feel conected to life? So what steps do they need to take to get their life straight? Sure they would get treatment of some sort.

I know someone who fits this bill and I don't exactly know how to help him. He has told me, even though he has a college degree, he doesn't know how to apply what he learned. He told me that everytime he looks at employment ads he feel even more worthless. The guy doesn't feel connected to anything! So if he goes for interviews, who would hire a guy with large gaps in employment such as he? Who can he turn to?


 
June 11, 2007, 4:19 pm CDT

Here's A Clue

 

 

In my 42 years of life and having went through ups and downs in my own finances, this is what I have decided.  The people you would be glad to help would never accept it and the rest that would accept would drain you dry and curse you when you have nothing more to give.  I have a BIL that I love as I would my own brother, he is hard working,  honest and has never asked us for anything that he didn't return as soon as he had the money.  The last time he borrowed anything was about 15 years ago during time off from a work accident.  The moment he settled he came to us with the cash in his hand.  Now I have another BIL and SIL that have repeatedly taken money, but I almost consider it a bargain because after they borrow, I don't see them for several months or years.  Can you imagine how hurtful this is to my husband?  He is a wonderful loving generous man, but has had to put his foot down when BIL asked us to co-sign for his house.  We finally convinced him  we meant business when we said no!

 
June 11, 2007, 4:33 pm CDT

This guy is a TOTAL LOSER!

Can't say more!
 
June 11, 2007, 4:37 pm CDT

06/11 Mega Moochers

I'm a firm believer in family helping family....ONCE.  Situations can come up beyond our control that may put us, any one of us, in situations where we need help be it financial or a TEMPORARY place to stay.  I'm from a big family, and we've all taken the hand of a sister, brother, Mother, Father during times when things had gone in the ditch.  We were all very gratedful and blessed to have been the giver or receiver in our time of need. But NEVER, I mean NEVER, has it ever been taken for granted or abused by anyone as it has been by  these deadbeats.  Giving a hand up to get BACK ON YOUR FEET doesn't generally take a year....or 18!  Usually a couple of weeks or a month at the outside does it.  These people are rediculous and need to be shown the other side of the door!
 
June 11, 2007, 4:48 pm CDT

A disservice to moochers

It's a shame when people enable family members to the extent that these guys (the mega moochers) have been enabled.  That's what it seems like to me.  These men were probably never expected to go to school, learn a trade, go to college and complete a degree, and work like most of us have done.  There are many reasons for this, I believe.  Sometimes it's guilt, fear of offspring, or just negligence on the part of family members that cripple these moochers. Only the sister of the guy who mooches on their grandfather seems to understand that it has to stop.  I think she was right to get involved in this matter.  Someone had to do it.  It shows that she cares for all of her family (including her brother) and wants something positive to come out of this.

 

I'm certainly no expert on the subject, but I am experiencing this and have been for years.  The parents did not realize they should have given verbal expectations to their children to go out and do something with their lives.  Oh, there are times when the parents try to pull back on support, but it doesn't last long.  I think it is a disservice to offspring not to give them the tools early on so they can fly on their own.  That's what parenting is all about.  We love our kids enough to let them fly. I'm afraid they won't be successful or learn to live without support from their parents if their parents don't stop what they are doing. 

 
June 11, 2007, 5:01 pm CDT

I might be a moocher

Hey, after seeing today's topic, I felt the need to register and post a comment.  I am 31 years old and have been unemployed for about a year and a half.  Since then, I've had to move in with my mom.  I don't know how people can stand it.  Being out of work, single, and living with mom has been the absolute hardest time of my life and I'm trying to find my way out of it.  I don't pay rent and have been living off of money I had saved up.  I feel bad for not paying rent, but I'm thankful my mom hasn't forced me to.  I plan on sending her my first paycheck when I finally get a job.

 

Does anyone have any advice for someone who is looking to get into academic advising or museum work?  It seems like everywhere I apply, I'm told I don't qualify because I lack a master's degree.  I don't get it.  Doesn't anyone train anymore?  It's not as if I'm as dumb as a sack of doorknobs and I do have a college education.  It's as if I'm stuck between more schooling and work.  I need work but the work I want requires more education and many of the programs I look into want students to have work experience.  Anyone have any advice?

 
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