Quote From: morrikiblueAm I the only one who got 'it'? Darby has been forced to choose. Her father forced her to choose him and his family while hating her mother! This mother, this woman, this perfectly human, ABUSED woman, lost one child, and almost lost both! She was VERY obviously devastated by the cruel and hateful actions taken by her ex-husband and his family. She needs emotional help AND support! Not more abuse! Cressi never made her daughters, either of them, choose one parent over another, her ex-husband AND his family did that. They subjected Darby to a hate filled childhood and forced her to choose the father and HIS family over the mother. He took Darby by force and then enlisted his family to thwart the efforts of Cressi in cruel and malicious ways. Make no mistake, the law always favors the wealthier parent! He and his family made Darby the angry resentful child she is today. Darby's father and his family used her like a thing that they owned and not a human being, while placing a devastated and financially challenged mother in the pitiable predicament of doing right by the child she still had or sacrificing that child for the one that was ripped away from her by the vicious act of her ex-husband and HIS family. Should the child, the oldest daughter who remained with Cressi, be forced to suffer more, be punished, just because her father is incapable of human compassion, care or concern for her well being? Tell me, what would you have done? What?
I happen to be the Uncle who raised Darby with my wife. It is too bad that only one side of this story was told.
Let me start by listing a few facts:
1. Cressi took the girls and ran off to Arizona with her boyfriend when Darby was 3 months old.
2. Yes, my brother went to Arizona and got his daughter. Cressi wrote a letter to my mother stating that "she gave Darby to her dad to raise as he wanted". I have that letter.
3. Jolene was not my brother's daughter. Only Cressi knows who her father is.
4. Darby came to live with my family (my wife and 3 kids) when she was 7 years old.
5. We were given initial custody of her because Darby asked for us and no other blood relatives were available to be considered.
6. We took Darby to numerous appearances in Childrens Court in Los Angeles. They initiated searches for Cressi to no avail. We never knew where she was or her new last name. We told the courts we had heard somewhere in Arizona.
7. We have lived in our house with the same phone number since 1979. Cressi has been to our house when she was married to my brother. So why did it take her 18 years to call my house?
8. We never told Darby negative things about either of her parents. We only wanted to make sure she grew up strong and could one day deal with it from a rational point of view. She only became angry when she had contact with her sister, Jolene. That is because of the stories Jolene told her of beatings from Cressi and her new step father. She also told Darby about her mom, Cressi, being arrested for beating her with clothes hangers and the school she was going to turning them in.
9. The grandmother "Lynn" is from Cressi's family not ours. Maybe she had good reason to not say anything to anyone. She probably felt Darby was better off with my family.
10. My brother has not had contact with Darby since she was around 9 years old. I only had contact with him in the last year and informed him that his daughter does not want to have anything to do with him.
11. Jolene has had 2 children by different fathers and has had them taken away by the Arizona courts because of drug convictions and being put in drug rehab. Yes, I talked to her when she called my house and told her she was welcome to come here to see Darby anytime she wanted or we would drive Darby there. She was not living with her mother and was at the opposite end of the state. Darby wanted to see her, but that never happened because she was still in drug rehab. Then Darby joined the Armed Forces and has not lived here in over a year.
12. Cressi's recollection of the phone call to my wife was a little off. It was not "it was your job to call her", it was"why have you not called here in 18 years".
13. Apparently Cressi also forgot to tell the audience about the 2 sons she has also had since she left. So that makes Jolene, Darby, one more daughter and two sons. I wonder if any of them graduated from high school with a 3.7 GPA and is working toward a career? And by the way, who is the father of the son born 9 months after she left my brother?
14. Darby is a little hard with her feelings toward her parents. Perhaps because of seeing what we went through a couple years ago when our oldest son was killed while serving in the Navy. She may of wished her parents had cared for her that much.
Maybe the next time people make judgements about my family, they should think of how they would have handled this situation. I'm sure we have made mistakes along the way, but the people at Child Protective Services thought we did a great job raising Darby. So does everyone who has known Darby over the years, from Counselors to teachers to friends and family (both sides). I know Jolene said how lucky Darby was when she talked to her.
Respectfully
Just a "Dad"
Our parents are among the most pivotal people in our life. They literally shape our minds and our personalities, teach us morals, values, and right from wrong. So when a parent disappears from a child’s world, the loss can result in a life-long quest. Dr. Phil meets two women whose child/parent bond was broken under two separate sets of devastating circumstances. Erica is in search of the man who murdered her mother when Erica was just a toddler. Erica says he tortured her mother, then shot her on the front lawn where she finally died. The man who committed this horrifying crime is Erica's own father! Then, Cressi has a daughter whom she hasn’t seen in nearly 20 years. She says her ex-husband snatched the girl from her home when she was just 8 months old. Did Cressi do everything she could to find her missing child, or does her daughter, Darby, have a right to feel abandoned? You will be amazed at what Dr. Phil finds as he goes in search of these missing loved ones. Talk about the show here.
