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Topic : 06/22 Settle This!

Number of Replies: 321
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Created on : Friday, January 05, 2007, 10:52:36 am
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 01/12/07) How many times have you heard your spouse say, "I'm right, and you're wrong"? Dr. Phil's guests are in a stand-off, and they want him to settle their dispute once and for all! Carla says her dog, Thomas, is her number one priority, but her husband, Tony, says she's gone way overboard with her puppy love. Tony says that Thomas gets the run of the house, and Carla cuddles with Thomas in bed instead of him. Should Carla make room for Tony, or does Tony need to get over his canine envy? Next up is a family caught in a style war. Betty lets her 15- and 11-year-old daughters wear short shorts, high heels and thong underwear. Her husband, Richie, says he'd rather see them covered from head to toe. Does Richie need to get with the times and realize these girls are just dressing in style, or has Betty let the girls take it too far? Then, Christine says her husband, Kevin, is out five nights a week playing or coaching sports, leaving her home with their 1-year-old son. Kevin says he deserves to get away from the ruckus of a chaotic household, and Christine knew he was a jock when they got married. Can Kevin learn to say no to others and yes to his wife and child? And, Lisa says her husband, Erik's, passion for flying is too dangerous, and he needs to give it up now that they have three young sons. Erik says flying is in his blood and it’s safer than driving a car. When Dr. Phil shares a personal story, will it put Lisa at ease? Share your thoughts, join the discussion.

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January 7, 2007, 10:44 am CST

01/12 Settle This!

Quote From: harleyrider

you are not controling... he had the children too.. and it is his responsibility to be there too ya he was a fireman when you meet.. but you didn't have children when you meet either so what is his point of that remark.. he can make kids and not share the responsibilty of raising them with you.. if you want to do it alone you would be alone...he need to be there for you too.. you need a break from doing everything with them to

 

I agree that the firefighter has a responsibility to be a dad to his kids.  However he is also a husband.  Not only does he need to spend time with the kids without mom but he also needs to have at least one date night with his wife.  Both of you  need to be reminded why you love each other, why you decided to get married.  After the "I do's" it's not happily ever after.  Mom needs to get the babysitter, surprise the firefighter at work one night and go out.  Don't discuss the kids, enjoy each other.  Then make arrangements for him to spend time with the kids individually or all together because thay need him.  His actions paves the way for how they will be and act toward others.
 
January 7, 2007, 12:37 pm CST

the fire fighter

Quote From: deecorky

I agree that the firefighter has a responsibility to be a dad to his kids.  However he is also a husband.  Not only does he need to spend time with the kids without mom but he also needs to have at least one date night with his wife.  Both of you  need to be reminded why you love each other, why you decided to get married.  After the "I do's" it's not happily ever after.  Mom needs to get the babysitter, surprise the firefighter at work one night and go out.  Don't discuss the kids, enjoy each other.  Then make arrangements for him to spend time with the kids individually or all together because thay need him.  His actions paves the way for how they will be and act toward others.

 

Sounds to me like you need to 'renegotiate" the whole relationship. Cant see, apart from the family, children tie, Why you would want to be in it as it dos,nt sound like a whole lot of fun at all.

 
January 7, 2007, 12:51 pm CST

01/12 Settle This!

Quote From: bburt510

I am the grandmother of a soon to be 15 year old and her Mom lets her dress any way she wants.  I think some mothers want to be their daughters friend instead of the parent.  The high schools and middle schools should have a dress code and the students should be made to follow it.  My granddaughter goes to Pam Beach Central in Florida, where they wear whatever they want.  Their clothes are tight,  low cut with thair breast visible to all.  They wear belly shirts,  mini skirts, and enough gold jewelry to even embarass Mr. T.  Yes, they all have cell phones, Ipods, and digital cameras (where they take pictures and display them on myspace. 

I told my daughter that she needs to get her head out of the ground (like an oestrich) and pay attention to what her daughter is wearing, who her friends are and what she does.  However, this resulted in her not talking to me anymore. 

I don't have any teenagers or but I do have a 4 year old who will be in kindergarten next year and from my own experience with my older cousins. I would not allow any daughter/cousin of mine to dress in such a provocative way that it would attract the wrong kind of attention. They keep this up and the other kids will think that they are prostituting themselves out to people I would be very afraid of contracting and STD for one thing and for another they are just too young to be dressing this way especially the 11 year old. It is one thing to let them dress up in flashy clothes to just dress up around the house but to go out in public like that just makes me angry. For the mother that your daughter won't talk to you anymore when she finally comes around to tell you that she has made a mistake she will just want someone to listen to her and that may be the only thing you can do. All you can do at this point is tell her how you feel which you have already done she may really mess up her life before she understands the consequences of what she is doing. Yes the schools would be alot better if they all went to uniforms at least from the parents point of view but then there would be alot of unhappy kids. I guess it is like they say you can please some of the people some of the time but not all of the people all of the time but I  like you don't want things to get out of control either with the schools.

 

Sonia

 
January 7, 2007, 1:21 pm CST

Professionalism

You know, dressing like a hooker on payday is not a value i'd want to instill in my kids.  Institutes of higher learning (law school, nursing school, medical school) have stricter dress codes than college classes.  What would your clients/patients think if you came in wearing thong underwear (sometimes you can see them through lighter pants) and had your breasts coming out?  Having them wear more conservative (but still cute and trendy) clothes gives them a higher standard for themselves.... I think....because there's a change in image and how you feel about yourself.  Anyway, off my soapbox i go.
 
January 7, 2007, 4:12 pm CST

01/12 Settle This!

Quote From: petmom26

 Hello, Everyone! I am writing in regard to the woman who prefers the company of her dog

over her spouse.

 I am really glad I don't have to fight with my hubby over our animals. We both grew up in households where the pets were part of the family. I, myself, always had animals around, and

I adore them,  whether its a Mouse or a Moose!!  

 We are in our late 20's, and have been married one year. We both want children very much, but

have not been blessed with kids yet. We do, however, have 1 dog, Maya, who we spoil, much like if she was our child! Admittedly, we also allow her to sleep in our bed with us at night.

When she was a puppy, she would lie on the floor, but that didn't last very long!

In addition to our dog, we also have 3 cats.  And, my hubby and I have never argued on the subject of our animals.  We just think of the pets as kind of an extension of our love for each other.

  Cassie

I prefer the company of my dogs because they are affectionate and never reject me like my husband does.  They are trained to stay off furniture, except for the beds. I want to cuddle in bed, and my husband prefers to be in bed alone, so I cuddle with my dog.  She was abused in a previous home, and feels safe next to me as she sleeps.  She has nightmares if we are not touching. 

 

He is more affectionate to the dogs than he is to me, and he is not jealous of my affection toward them.   We have been married almost 4 years.  We do not have any children.  We are separating.  I am fortunate to have the company and affection of my dogs.

 
January 7, 2007, 4:52 pm CST

love those pets

Quote From: petmom26

 Hello, Everyone! I am writing in regard to the woman who prefers the company of her dog

over her spouse.

 I am really glad I don't have to fight with my hubby over our animals. We both grew up in households where the pets were part of the family. I, myself, always had animals around, and

I adore them,  whether its a Mouse or a Moose!!  

 We are in our late 20's, and have been married one year. We both want children very much, but

have not been blessed with kids yet. We do, however, have 1 dog, Maya, who we spoil, much like if she was our child! Admittedly, we also allow her to sleep in our bed with us at night.

When she was a puppy, she would lie on the floor, but that didn't last very long!

In addition to our dog, we also have 3 cats.  And, my hubby and I have never argued on the subject of our animals.  We just think of the pets as kind of an extension of our love for each other.

  Cassie

i am sure glad that my husband loves animals as much as i do cause we treat them just like they were our kids.. 2 dogs and 3 cats  my x husband always would fight with me on animals... well you see where that got him x 
 
January 7, 2007, 8:16 pm CST

01/12 Settle This!

poor tony, what you need to do is take lessons from your dog man, he seems to be smarter than you  lol, hes got your wife where you want to be, play it cool and wait till shes not looking and  ask your dog what his secret is.
 
January 7, 2007, 10:54 pm CST

love my dogs

 I have a T-Shirt that reads :The more I meet people the more I like my dogs....and it is so true alot of the times....I have 3 dogs and they go from very small to very big and they are the sweetest and I couldn't imagine not having them around,,,,I have a Chihuahua, a rat terrer and my big dog is part german shepherd and part st bernard he is a  big dog but he is so gentle with the other dogs...me and my husband raised 4 kids our youngest moved out 2 yrs ago the same time we had to put our 15yr old german shepherd to sleep due to illness...we just meant to get one and ended up with 3 and we are really enjoying them, I house broke all three and they are house dogs and are very protective...we couldn't be happier,,, it helps with the empty nest syndrom....I couldn't imagine not liking animals....
 
January 7, 2007, 11:04 pm CST

clothes they wear

my husband and I raised 3 girls and we were very picky about what they wore.. but we never had any fight over their clothes because they heard the other girls in school talk about the girls that wore reveling clothes or real short shorts or short dresses and skirts..and they did not want people to think bad things about them..and thats what happens if u let your young daughters were those kind of clothes they are getting a bad reputation...and that is sad....
 
January 8, 2007, 6:17 am CST

Get the dog out of the bed!

I have 5 dogs, 4cats, and 1 parakeet. I love our pets, but I don't need them in bed with us. My husband and I have been married 32 years. We have 2 grown children and they only slept with us occasionally. Plus, my little Shih-tzu thinks he's my bodyguard anyway. He might really get the big-head if he started sleeping with us. I'm a stay-at- home housewife. I get plenty of quality time with my pets. The bed is for sleeping and other private stuff.
 
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