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Topic : 01/17 Gender Identity Crisis

Number of Replies: 595
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Created on : Friday, January 12, 2007, 02:23:36 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Imagine waking up one morning and realizing that you’ve been living in the wrong body. That’s what Dr. Phil’s first guest says happened to her. Bernadette started dressing like a boy in high school. Now 37, she wants to be referred to as Cameron, and wants her breasts surgically removed. Cameron’s mom, Antoinette, and her aunts say she’s just angry, lost and confused. Will they ever accept her decision to become a man? Then, Sylvia’s 17-year-old daughter, Gwen, was murdered when a group of boys found out that she was one of them. The grieving mother weighs in on this important discussion. And, should a high school boy who dresses like a girl be allowed to use the girls’ bathroom? That’s the issue one Florida high school faced. The boy’s lawyer and two moms from the community engage in a heated debate. Plus, Jim and Linda’s 4-year-old daughter, Kayleigh, was born with Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome, a condition where she looks like a female on the outside, but inside, she’s an underdeveloped male. Should the parents be forced to decide Kayleigh’s gender? Talk about the show here.

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January 17, 2007, 6:55 am CST

I am the mother of Kayleigh

And I would like to explain a few things.  She could never physcially become a boy because her condition is such that she cannot absorb the male hormone.  If she could have, she would have been a boy in utero... born a boy, etc.  Her behavior suggests strongly to me that she indeed FEELS like a boy.  So she's not ever going to make any sort of transition other than act like a boy, refers to herself as a boy and unfortunately will be a very curvy woman as she grows.  There will be nothing she can do about it.  It's not cut and dried.  God made a MAN or a WOMAN.... that's a joke.  Then what is my daughter?  She has been referred to by the medical profession as a "freak" or an "it".  What am I supposed to make of that?  She is absolutely beautiful and outgoing child.  My issue is how do I keep her happy?  That is my only goal in my life.  If I can face my maker at the end of my life and say that I did right by my kids - then I will feel i've done what I was put on this Earth to do.

 

It's not a sexual issue... she's only 4!  What do you bible thumpers make of this?

 

BTW. Jamie Lee Curtis was born with this same condition as was Pamela Guildy (regular actress on CSI - I have spoken to her on many ocassions.)

 
January 17, 2007, 7:09 am CST

God made a PERFECT world...

Quote From: lisbetha

but disease, death, genetic disorders... they are the result of SIN, not God's doing.

 

Dr. Phil made a point of saying we need to accept people for who they are... how about these people accepting who they are themselves and being who they were meant and created to be ~ girls if you're born a girl, guys if you're born a guy?!?  For the parents of the little four year old, my heart and prayers surely goes out to you.  I guess if I knew this medical problem existed in my family history, I'd be making a personal CHOICE not to have children, than to run the risk of what you are going through... sadly )c;

 

 

 
January 17, 2007, 7:33 am CST

Thank you...

Quote From: tuffnutt1

I was about to say the same thing, that if god doesnt make mistakes then why are there so many birth defects, children dieng young?

 (This to the bible thumpers), LIKE IT OR NOT your GOD does make mistakes...Live with it. You want to preach how he made man and woman. Doesnt Your God also tell you to love all creatures the same?  I am a straight female the normal heterosexual relationship married and kids, Just so you don't get any ideas that it is always the TG/CD that respond to these, I'm so sick and tired of people like you telling other people how they should live there lives.  Be it two same sex people wanting to get married or a male who wants to be a female, WHO the hell are you to judge.  What some one does in there house, with there body has NO EFFECT on you.  Get off your HOLY HIGH horse, until you walk a mile in someone Else's shoe's you have NO RIGHT, to judge.  GOD makes no mistakes?. Then why is it that there are people born with both sexes? Both a penis and a vagina!  Is that not a mistake?  Or is that just the doing of the parents? Scientific fact shows that a man can be born with xx chromosomes, which is a female trait, now wouldnt it be conceivable that if a man has extra female chromosomes he would tend to feel more feminine?  WHY cant you religious fanatics just let people live, why must you always try and put your nose into others business.  People are dieing all the time because Christians think that they are so superior that they actually go out in KILL, in the name of GOD because people wont conform to your brainwash.  Killing in the name of god is just a cop out for you to get away with the evil that is in ALL of us. 

At least someone in these posts "get's it".

 
January 17, 2007, 7:38 am CST

01/17 Gender Identity Crisis

Quote From: shetypes

I'd hope we learned to not blame a higher power for our mistakes?  All the household cleaning chemicals alone is outrageous.  Most water is chemically treated, bottled water was tested and found not as safe as most faucet water?  Food filled with color, flavors? Medications scripted out for everything from in grown toe nails to sleeping aids? I don't think they really know all the effects of a woman taking birth control pills over time to the future generations?  I know we minimzed alot of polution but the effects is still with us.  I think the gene pool is made up from 4 generations on each side?  That is alot of potential for what could be a problem if both parents

carry samy links to problems to thier children?

 

The Bathroom?  Boys = male gender  Girls = female gender !  It is about the gender physically!

We cannot risk some court battle that ends up making bathrooms not private to genders! 

 

How we live, how the generations of dumping oils and chemicals in our ground made mistakes,

diets, medications and life style made mistakes.  Now the children are paying for it.

thats not Gods fault, it ours.

Blame a Higher power..I don't blame any one.  I am just angry that Everyone has to have their nose in everyone Else's business.  This GOD that everyone talks about from what I know tells man to love ALL man, it doesn't say love all man as long as man loves only the opposite sex, or stays the way I made him. 

People are less angry anymore that kids are being kidnapped and murdered by maniacs.  A man goes free for murder, and It doesn't even faze anyone.  BUT oh boy let two men try to get married and it becomes a national emergency to pass laws against it, or let a man try to become a woman, Oh thats unholy that cant be.  If you don't believe in it that is fine everyone has a right to there opinion, but there are other religions out there, and some of them actually don't care what people do to themselves, as long as they are not harming others.  Some religions don't believe thats fine keep believing it, but KEEP it in your religion and stop trying to push it on everyone else,  I don't want a religion that the god says "I hate gays" or any one for that matter..

People in religious communities have killed others and said that it was gods will, because he doesn't like gays.  If that is how god is I don't want any thing to do with it.  because one day it could change to something else this god doesn't like and poof some one else is killed because the color hair he has.

There were birth defects way before all the contamination in the world.  For pete sakes according to the bible were we not all created from only TWO people, then they had TWO kids both boys..so How did the rest of us come to be?  EVE had to procreate with her sons.  Would that not be considered a mistake on the part of this GOD or higher power you speak of?  He failed to plan appropriately for the population of the earth, or is it that that is OK to have sex with relatives?  but it is not now? 

in the bible GOD has killed in revenge and anger, but yet he is supposed to be a kind being.  would that not be considerd a mistake?  If I was to kill in anger it would be punished,

 

 
January 17, 2007, 7:44 am CST

HELLO!!!!!!

These people did not just wake up one day and decide they were in the wrong bodies. They have lived with these feelings their entire lives. From when they were small children they felt something was wrong. Everyone has a right to their opinion on this subject. But considering all the hatred, nasty comments and rejection they have to endure, do any of you really think that this is what they wanted in life. To be looked upon as a freak and a pervert. They want what all of us want. They just want to be the best person they can and for the people they love to accept them and love them for what they are inside.
 
January 17, 2007, 7:44 am CST

Genitalia

Quote From: ceildh1

Thank you for your posts,

I really hope you have opened a few minds, and if not you have given the rest of us the perspective at least of what you have went through, and I for one thank you for not hiding yourself , and being open and honest to who you are.

Besides, genetalia is only ONE aspect of what makes us male or female as far as I can tell.

Thank you.  You are right.  Genetalia is only one aspect of what makes us male or female.  Some transgender people, particularly female-to-male, never have genital surgery...and even if they do, the results are limited.  So, one must consider, what kind of man do I want to be in the world?  How do I want to treat a woman I may be with?  I resolved within myself that I want to be a man of good character, ethics, compassion, manners, etc.  I wanted to express my masculinity in honorable ways.  The last thing I wanted was to turn into just another jerk of a man.  Your maleness or your femaleness is more than your body.  However, it is still important to feel at home in your body as best you are able.  Whether your body appears male, female, large, or small...we all want to feel like we belong in it.
 
January 17, 2007, 7:50 am CST

Sin?

Quote From: mex_y_can

but disease, death, genetic disorders... they are the result of SIN, not God's doing.

 

Dr. Phil made a point of saying we need to accept people for who they are... how about these people accepting who they are themselves and being who they were meant and created to be girls if you're born a girl, guys if you're born a guy?!?  For the parents of the little four year old, my heart and prayers surely goes out to you.  I guess if I knew this medical problem existed in my family history, I'd be making a personal CHOICE not to have children, than to run the risk of what you are going through... sadly )c;

 

 

What sin results in disease, death, genetic disorders?

 

So I guess that means you and your family has no sickness, death, or other misfortune?  Last I checked, plenty of supposed Christian people suffer illnesses, death, natural disasters, birth defects, etc.  I suppose this means if that happens at your church you sit back and judge the person saying "Gosh i wonder what sin they committed to deserve that?"

 

How preposterous and illogical.

 
January 17, 2007, 7:51 am CST

Friend of a trans man

The daughter of a friend has recently announced that she is transgendered.  The biggest problem I have with this is that a year ago she was chasing guys...then 9 months ago she came out as a lesbian, 2 months later she moved to another state and then 2 months later gave us the transgender news.  She was allowed to start hormone therapy without the first bit of counseling.  While I understand the science of all of this, I can't help but feel this girl is confused and at the very least should have been required to go through some sort of counseling before taking the hormone step.  Why aren't there laws about this or guidelines that doctors have to follow in this?

 

The feeling I get from this in my conversations with her is that she's looking for a place to fit in...looking for a community.  She's perfectly willing to write off her friends and family and not look back.  I now understand how parents of children who have joined cults must feel!

 

If this is considered a real illness, how do they diagnose it other than the person telling them that's what it is?  And what are the guidelines in treating it?

 
January 17, 2007, 7:55 am CST

i feel bad for you

Quote From: mex_y_can

but disease, death, genetic disorders... they are the result of SIN, not God's doing.

 

Dr. Phil made a point of saying we need to accept people for who they are... how about these people accepting who they are themselves and being who they were meant and created to be girls if you're born a girl, guys if you're born a guy?!?  For the parents of the little four year old, my heart and prayers surely goes out to you.  I guess if I knew this medical problem existed in my family history, I'd be making a personal CHOICE not to have children, than to run the risk of what you are going through... sadly )c;

 

 

so if these are a result of sin and god uses what the devil intends for evil for good than it is safe to say that us transsexuals might just be born this way and if god intends to use us for good as i am a transsexual female and i have brought someone to know christ through my transition and to have children is an act of faith as god said to adam and eve now go and populate and to not have children because of fear of genetic disorders is not godly cause everything has flaws except the lord our god so on your line of thinking you would not have children at all because there is no such thing as a genetically perfect child and that is why i feel bad for you cause children is gods gift to us to bring joy into our lifes.

 
January 17, 2007, 8:01 am CST

01/17 Gender Identity Crisis

Quote From: shetypes

I'd hope we learned to not blame a higher power for our mistakes?  All the household cleaning chemicals alone is outrageous.  Most water is chemically treated, bottled water was tested and found not as safe as most faucet water?  Food filled with color, flavors? Medications scripted out for everything from in grown toe nails to sleeping aids? I don't think they really know all the effects of a woman taking birth control pills over time to the future generations?  I know we minimzed alot of polution but the effects is still with us.  I think the gene pool is made up from 4 generations on each side?  That is alot of potential for what could be a problem if both parents

carry samy links to problems to thier children?

 

The Bathroom?  Boys = male gender  Girls = female gender !  It is about the gender physically!

We cannot risk some court battle that ends up making bathrooms not private to genders! 

 

How we live, how the generations of dumping oils and chemicals in our ground made mistakes,

diets, medications and life style made mistakes.  Now the children are paying for it.

thats not Gods fault, it ours.

I think you watch too much of the SiFi channel!!!!
 
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