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Topic : 01/19 Young Moms Ask the Experts

Number of Replies: 902
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Created on : Friday, January 12, 2007, 02:26:43 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Young moms have a million questions about their little ones, from, “How do I stop the temper tantrums?” to “What do I do if my child just won’t eat?” Dr. Phil enlists the help of a family of experts in the field of pediatrics: Dr. William Sears and sons, Dr. James Sears, and Dr. Robert Sears. Collectively they’ve written 50 books that cover anything and everything a mom or dad could ever want to know. Together they field questions from young mothers. First, Angela says her 3-year-old daughter, Ellie, has been a screamer since the day she was born. Could Ellie’s temperament be the result of Angela’s feelings toward her at birth? Then, Robert and Wendy argue over what to do with their baby’s night crying. Robert claims Wendy runs to their 4 ½-month-old son, Ethan, at every whimper, sigh and cry. Wendy says Robert just doesn’t get it -- and why would he? She says he just sleeps right through it. Plus, Lisa says she’s terrified of germs and takes every precaution to keep her kids from getting sick. Her husband, Michael, says “Enough already!” Who’s right? Learn the answers to these and other parenting dilemmas and share your own concerns here.

For more information, visit http://www.askdrsears.com.

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January 28, 2007, 9:41 am CST

Feeding Rice Cereal etc. before 6 months

I haven't been able to read every post in here (over 800!) but has anyone brought up the topic of eating rice cereal at 6 months?  My pediatrician told us to start at our 4 month appointment.  If this is new information about babies digestive system not being able to handle it, then why haven't we heard of more research on this topic before if we are "harming" our babies as so (as thats basically what a mother hears) SEARS doctors state.

 

  I would like to see more proof from someone making these claims on tv.   Show me your study.  I'm a little dissapointed in DR phil for letting someone make claims on his show without evidence.  Where was the "studies have shown" statements?  Sure they stated that Amercian Academy of Pediatrics recommends 6 months now, but as a mother already feeding her 4 month old rice cereal (which by the way also addiction to carbs ....where is the proof in that claim too!). 

 

Is this just new information that SEARS doctors are trying to use to make money selling their books because thats all it is, is NEW INFORMATION if there isn't any proof.  Show me more if your going to go on national television and make a claim without proof.  Simply stating that American Academy of Pediatrics says so won't cut it for me. 

 

 

 
January 28, 2007, 9:01 pm CST

01/19 Young Moms Ask the Experts

Quote From: tripmom2

 

Hi, I am a mom of 5 children.  My oldest is a nine year old boy, then seven year old triplets and lastly but not least a 10 month old girl.  After I watched "ask the expert "show I felt like I miss parented my children, especially my triplet boys.  The doctors on the panel, Dr. Sears and family were very informative but their advice on never to let your baby cry would have made me feel helpless and totally out of control when my boys were babies.  In the case of my triplets, someone was always crying.  They weren't neglected. It was just they had to take turns in everything.  When it was naptime or bedtime I couldn't cuddle them til they fell asleep.  I had to put them in their crib, touch them, console them  and then leave so they learned how to fall asleep on their own.  They cried, but as long as I knew they were fed, changed and not sick I had to believe they were ok.  At first, before I did this routine they were all in bed with me including my oldest and my husband and I were falling out of bed. Then we tried rocking my babies til they fell asleep.  That took close to 2 hours every nap and bedtime.  It was insane and we had had enough.  I had to teach my oldest (then 2years old) to stay in his own bed and he cried.  It tore my heart out but I knew that in a week or so it will be much calmer at bedtime.  Teaching my children to be able to fall asleep on their own was one of the most difficult things my husband and I had to do but today when it is bedtime, in a 15 mins. they are all asleep.  Dr. Sears and his sons had one point of view with this issue, but I am sure that there are reputable excellent doctors that don't have this viewpoint.  I would be interested to see a follow up show on parenting with a different viewpoint.  I'm always eager to learn more.  Thank-you

((HUGS)) I am against the CIO method in most cases, but I also know there's a huge difference between an infant and 2 yo, and there's also a limit to what we as parents can handle. With triplets... wow. Don't beat yourself up!
 
January 29, 2007, 9:57 am CST

i feel sorry for...

I feel sorry for moms with a diety complex whose mouths are more open than their minds.  People who judge others without even knowing them need some self reflection.
 
January 30, 2007, 9:53 am CST

rice cereal

Quote From: jumpin2020

I haven't been able to read every post in here (over 800!) but has anyone brought up the topic of eating rice cereal at 6 months?  My pediatrician told us to start at our 4 month appointment.  If this is new information about babies digestive system not being able to handle it, then why haven't we heard of more research on this topic before if we are "harming" our babies as so (as thats basically what a mother hears) SEARS doctors state.

 

  I would like to see more proof from someone making these claims on tv.   Show me your study.  I'm a little dissapointed in DR phil for letting someone make claims on his show without evidence.  Where was the "studies have shown" statements?  Sure they stated that Amercian Academy of Pediatrics recommends 6 months now, but as a mother already feeding her 4 month old rice cereal (which by the way also addiction to carbs ....where is the proof in that claim too!). 

 

Is this just new information that SEARS doctors are trying to use to make money selling their books because thats all it is, is NEW INFORMATION if there isn't any proof.  Show me more if your going to go on national television and make a claim without proof.  Simply stating that American Academy of Pediatrics says so won't cut it for me. 

 

 

With my first 2 boys, we were told to wait until 6 months to feed our babies rice cereal, and then gradually add baby fruits and veggies, one at a time, every 2 weeks.

 

With our 3rd son, we were told to start feeding him rice cereal and baby food bananas at 4 months because he had a relflux problem and would have projectile vomiting after every feeding.  Rice cereal was supposed to be heavier and stay down better.  It didnt' improve the situation at all, and by the age of 6 months, he was at the 95th percentile for weight...way more than he should have been.  By the time he was a toddler, his weight normalized...with activity and typical toddler picky appetite.

 

I'd like to know where the American Acedemy of Pediatrics gets their info.  What kind of reasearch are they doing to support these claims?  Who wants their baby to be a "guinea pig" for a research study??  Nobody ever asked ME to fill out a survey on what works and what doesn't...that is individual for every baby and his/her parents.

 

I tried the CIO method on my oldest child...for about two days...I couldn't stand it.  He was much happier to be picked up right away.  We made sure he was fed, diapered, burped and cuddled before he went to bed.  Eventually, he learned to sleep in his own bed...until toddlerhood, when he discovered the freedom to get out of bed.  We gave him 4 "tickets" to get up for a drink, etc...then he was to stay in his bed for the night.  We let him have a toy to keep him entertained until he fell asleep...it worked for us for all three kids.  CIO is not for every baby...self-calming comes from the confidence that mom or dad will come when they are needed...crying is a baby's way of communicating, and not responding to their cries, in my opinion, hinders the development of communication as the child grows.  No Acedemy of Pediatrics "study" will change my mind on that.

 
January 30, 2007, 9:16 pm CST

hey

Quote From: purplepenny

Well, siblings can be positive and negative. I have two brothers and the three of us are great friends and we love to be together. My husband has two sisters, he loves them a lot, but they aren't close.

My mother hates every single one of her sisters. My father doesn't get along with any of his siblings but one.

I think my daughter will be fine being an only child. Not that she has a choice..LOL...but I don't believe or buy into some of the negative things I hear about only children. Even so far my daughter who is nearing 3 rarely has a tantrum (she's had 2 so far...one was yesterday! LOL) and she knows all about sharing and giving. And when she is around other kids she is very social.

I was told over and over that..."Oh by the time the kids is such and such age you won't be scared anymore!"...LOL..nope.  I still have severe pain now and my scar (which is about 2 inches wide and 5 inches long) is always sore still.
weird to ask u this but she kinda subconscious bout her chest.  I told u bout this the other day and u responded. TY.  Should i always make sure she wearing 2 shirts all the time, especially in summer or wat?  LOL Do they even make bras for girls that age??  Remember she NOT over weidht  she 4 .5 ft tall 64lbs.  She 6.  Any tips, suggestions, ideas?? let me know, ty..
 
January 31, 2007, 1:06 pm CST

Investigated This..

Quote From: momofbrw

Please get another doctor!   He/she should have his/her license pulled for telling you to drug your child into sleeping ---and with benedryl???  Do you realize that even a little bit of an overdose will kill a baby???

 

This does not surprise me because I have heard and seen some of the most outlandish advice from doctors.  Yet, I used to think they were all-knowing and would never steer a patient wrong.  I am so glad that I am not that ignorant anymore!!!

 

 

 

I have talked to 3 pediatric specialists, and her family doctor.  There is NO harm in giving a child (over 3 months of age) 1 ml of Benedryl for sleeping dissorders(which my daughter has been diagnosed with).  It is the safest form of sleep aid for children of that age.  She spent the night in the sleep clinic at the hospital and she is unable to enter into REM sleep.  I investigated this perscription and I am more than confident that I have a VERY good docor.  I live in Canada and have free healthcare.  This Doctor has been my  family physician for 21 years and I strongly believe that he would NEVER do anything to harm my baby.  You should know your source before you make comments.  I agree that at first I was not comfortable with medication, but after the clinic, I have no choice.  In order for my daughter to have a happy, healthy life, she needs a sleep aid.  I would do anything to help her.
 
January 31, 2007, 1:17 pm CST

01/19 Young Moms Ask the Experts

Quote From: jsg262003

weird to ask u this but she kinda subconscious bout her chest.  I told u bout this the other day and u responded. TY.  Should i always make sure she wearing 2 shirts all the time, especially in summer or wat?  LOL Do they even make bras for girls that age??  Remember she NOT over weidht  she 4 .5 ft tall 64lbs.  She 6.  Any tips, suggestions, ideas?? let me know, ty..

Is this a big deal to her or to you?  Is she subconcious about her chest because you keep talking about it?  Does anyone else?  I think being 6 she sees that the other girls are not like her and it may make her feel out of place.  Reassure her that there is nothing wrong with her and just let her know that people mature at different ages and it looks like she's ahead of the other girls.

 

I really wouldn't make a big deal about it, but if you think having her wear a tank top or one of those underwear shirts (I think that's what they're called) would make her feel better then go for it.  You can find them, usually by the underwears, I think I've seen them in packages.

 

Hope this helps.

 
January 31, 2007, 5:09 pm CST

Are YOU a doctor?

Quote From: momofbrw

Please get another doctor!   He/she should have his/her license pulled for telling you to drug your child into sleeping ---and with benedryl???  Do you realize that even a little bit of an overdose will kill a baby???

 

This does not surprise me because I have heard and seen some of the most outlandish advice from doctors.  Yet, I used to think they were all-knowing and would never steer a patient wrong.  I am so glad that I am not that ignorant anymore!!!

 

 

 

Just because your friends may be doctors, doesn't mean you are one.  In your world, you might think you know better than most professionals, but you don't.  Most doctors aren't out to get you, believe it or not.  They aren't twitching their mustaches, just waiting to steer you wrong because they can.  You come off very presumptuous and seem to only read and cite what you support, not very open-minded.  Very sad...
 
January 31, 2007, 5:17 pm CST

hmmmm

Quote From: elffie

Is this a big deal to her or to you?  Is she subconcious about her chest because you keep talking about it?  Does anyone else?  I think being 6 she sees that the other girls are not like her and it may make her feel out of place.  Reassure her that there is nothing wrong with her and just let her know that people mature at different ages and it looks like she's ahead of the other girls.

 

I really wouldn't make a big deal about it, but if you think having her wear a tank top or one of those underwear shirts (I think that's what they're called) would make her feel better then go for it.  You can find them, usually by the underwears, I think I've seen them in packages.

 

Hope this helps.

Not the response i was lookin for but ...ok.   No it more big deal for her than me.  ty
 
February 1, 2007, 7:12 am CST

Your daughter will be just fine

Quote From: purplepenny

Well, siblings can be positive and negative. I have two brothers and the three of us are great friends and we love to be together. My husband has two sisters, he loves them a lot, but they aren't close.

My mother hates every single one of her sisters. My father doesn't get along with any of his siblings but one.

I think my daughter will be fine being an only child. Not that she has a choice..LOL...but I don't believe or buy into some of the negative things I hear about only children. Even so far my daughter who is nearing 3 rarely has a tantrum (she's had 2 so far...one was yesterday! LOL) and she knows all about sharing and giving. And when she is around other kids she is very social.

I was told over and over that..."Oh by the time the kids is such and such age you won't be scared anymore!"...LOL..nope.  I still have severe pain now and my scar (which is about 2 inches wide and 5 inches long) is always sore still.

I was just reading over the message boards that I missed earlier in January.

 

Regarding having an only child - my daughter is an only child and I wanted to let you know that an only child can turn out just fine.

 

People never realize - when she was younger or now that she is in her mid thirties - that she is an only child.  She is warm, caring, smart, personalable and an absolutely terrific person, as noted not just by me but also by her husband, friends, relatives, co workers, just about everyone she comes in contact with.  Being an only child was never a problem.  Sometimes when we went on a car vacation, we would take one of her friends with us.  Flying vacations we took just her.  She's always been hugely popular with her peers and when younger, with her teachers, too.

 

I think it has to do with how you raise them, what you expect, what you require, etc.  I know others with an only child who have turned out fine and as grown-ups don't feel they missed anything by not having a sibling.  I know others who have more than more child and sometimes they have one that is so like the stereotype of an only child that you are shocked to find out they're not!!

 

My daughter has a 3 year old daughter of her own who will  be an only child due to pregnancy problems on the the part of the mom that will reoccur.  She has been advised not to have more.  She and her husband are fine with that.  When people tell them they absolutely need more - her husband points to our daugher and asks why they need more than one when one can turn out so great!

 

Your daughter will be fine as an only child.

 
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