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Topic : 06/27 Problem Parent or Problem Child?

Number of Replies: 169
New Messages This Week: 0
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Created on : Friday, January 19, 2007, 01:23:14 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 01/24/07) Do you find yourself wondering where your relationship with your child went wrong? You say it’s your child. Your child says it’s you. Who’s to blame? Dr. Phil uncovers where the problem lies in these families. Penny says her life is in shambles because her 17-year-old son, Jason, is extremely threatening and violent. Jason says his mother is a lazy alcoholic, and all he has ever wanted was to feel loved by her. Penny’s sister, Jackie, says Penny has a drinking problem and wants the mother and son to get help before they kill each other. Then, Kim has three sons –- 14, 2 and 15 months -- but says she loves her middle son, Cullen, the most. She has pictures of him all over her house, but not her other two sons. She takes Cullen to bed with her at night, while the baby cries himself to sleep in his own room, and she buys Cullen new clothes, while her youngest gets hand-me-downs. Her oldest son says he has felt neglected his whole life and is worried the baby will feel that way too. Kim’s friend, Starlette, says Kim’s baby has even started calling her Mama. What’s behind Kim’s favoritism, and why does she feel justified? Share your thoughts here.

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June 27, 2007, 4:11 pm CDT

This angers and hurts me so much.

This happened in my childhood home, if that is what you call it.  I no contact with my parents (or my siblings) any more because they had their favorite kids and I was not one of them.  I would like to sit down and tell the mother how it affects grown up children.  I swore I would never raise my daughters the way I was raised (with neglect, alcohol , sexual  physical, mentally and emotionally abused)  I still suffer in silent over this and no one knows. 
 
June 27, 2007, 5:29 pm CDT

PLEASE HELP US FIND CELESTE

 We need your help! Celeste Sharae Ahhee  has been missing from Independence, Missouri since June 13th. When her mother went to bed at 10:30 p.m. on the 12th Celeste was in bed. At 2:45 a.m. her step-father went to check on her she was gone. Because she is seventeen law enforcement will not issue an Amber Alert. They have her listed as a runaway but missing and there is no active search. All of her personal possessions are at home. There is not a single piece of clothing, make-up, or personal hygene product gone, just her! The mother feels the circumstances are suspicious. Anyone can go to www.myspace.com/mybutters to view pictures of celeste. We need help getting the word out since the media here will not help. Anyone having information about Celeste please contact your local law enforcement agency, National Center for Missing and Exploited Children at 1-800-THE LOST, Let's Bring Them Home 1-866-479-LBTH, or contact the mother, Kimberly Newland, personally at 1-816-838-5401.

This is my cousin, we were raised together and this is really tearing her up. Also Celeste has not picked up her last 2 paychecks from work.
 
June 27, 2007, 5:44 pm CDT

three kids!

I can't believe a women would bring one more child knowing she feels like that about her first son,and she brings three kids and has no Father for them,what does that tell you about her. 

I feel realy bad about the oldest Son,i hope some works out for him.

Why do people bring kids in to this world and don't want to do there jobs as parents.  

 
June 27, 2007, 7:56 pm CDT

June 27th show-17 year old and Mom

I went through the same thing as that woman. My son ran the house, punched holes in the wall and cursed
and threaten me. He started to hate me. He didn't want to work or go to school. He put me down and yelled at me. He was out all night and slept all day. I was a single Mom. I did everything for him and wanted the best for him. To come home from work
every day was so hard, because I never knew what kind of mood he would be in. He had me so scared of him. I felt battered. I had to get tranquilizers to help
me relax and sleep. When he turned 20 I moved out.
He was very angry at me...he is now married and is still angry at me. As far as he is concern, I was a bad parent. A mother can't always be blamed. A 17 year
old boy should move if he is unhappy at home instead of being allow to batter his mother. No wonder she can't stop drinking.
 
June 27, 2007, 8:03 pm CDT

Dr. Phil assessed Penny/Jason correctly

Having had a mom that was an alcoholic myself during critical years teens, Jason's excuses for being a disrespectful terrorizer are lame. He needs to step up to the plate and recognize the dead end road that he is on. He needs to be more accountable for his life and make some changes. The mother, Penny, does have a drinking and depression problem and needs help. Jason was way more out of line on his cell phone videos than the mom. The sister Jackie needs to tone down her "help". Give your sister a break and help her with compassion. If that does not work, let her live her life no matter how much it breaks your heart. Auntie - help the son! Don't you give him the excuse that he could be and do better only if his mom wasn't an alcoholic.

 
June 27, 2007, 8:17 pm CDT

Jen - where is your 9 year old's Dad during his physical outbursts

Quote From: housewife52

I believe you. It sounds like you're trying to do the best you can. I hope ya'll can get a handle on things. And although it doesn't help to blame the parent, it sounds like his mother didn't help things very much. And in the case of the boy on this show, his mother contributed a lot to the problem.Especially since your step-son is only 9(in my thinking the younger they are maybe it's easier to get a hold of them) I hope you find something or someone who can help him. Maybe you could see if a show is planned for this in the future and try to get picked for it. I can't think of the Dr.'s name who is on the show a lot concerning behavior problems, but wouldn't it be great if he could help your son? But don't give up on what you're trying to do. And, be safe.
Dad needs to step up and handle this. It's call discipline!
 
June 27, 2007, 9:15 pm CDT

Problem parent or problem child

 Jason  spent 4 months with the crew and counselors at the Outback Treatment Center, he continues to have compulsive behavior problems, and is trying to apply what he learned at

Outback to his daily life.

 

His mother also was treated for her alcohol problem at the La Hacienda, and has been clean

and sober since the show filmed.

 

Jason's, Aunt Jackie has turned her back on all of us and refuses to acknowledge that she has any problems. 

 
June 27, 2007, 9:25 pm CDT

Heavy consequenes for playing favorites.

The golden child of our family was my brother. This caused fights between my parents. We were a family of 4 children. The family fell apart after my fathers death in 1981. It started with my mother giving my brother the family farm, telling the rest of the children thats what my father wanted,BULL. It went down hill from there. My sister has not spoke to my mother or brother since around 1991. My other sister takes care of my mother only because she has a heart of gold but does try to avoid talking to her when she can. I myself have got to the point where I could care less if I donot see or hear from my brother again. I gave him agift awhile back and he never called to thank me . If I saw him it was because I went to see him and if I talked to him it was because Icalled him. I was in the hospital 6 weeks ago and he didnot bother to call.  I guess its because it was the way he was raised as the favorite of my mother. I didnot talk to my mother from around 1993 until 2003. I tried having another relationship with her but it failed, All had to do with my brother. If my mother calls I speak to her but thats it. Its a shame she missed 14 years of her 18 year old grandchilds life. I was told by my sister that when my  wife and I son was born, the first words out of her mouth were I was hoping your other brother would have the first male grandchild. Is that not pitiful. This may sound mean of me but you know what they say you get what you deserve, My brother tried 3 times but couldnot give my mother her golden male granchild and just as my mother is aging and in declining health my brother quits his job and moves 800 miles away. She thought he would be here to take care of her, so much that she bet the farm on it. So young parents beware, donot make a mistake that you will pay for the rest of your life,    TREAT YOUR CHILDREN EQUALLY!!!!!!!!
 
June 27, 2007, 9:58 pm CDT

Not easy to live with someone like this

I have been dating a man who has 2 adopted children and 1 that he and his wife had after the 2 adopted children.  He openly states that he is closest to his 27 year old adopted daughter.  She is his favorite and it is so obvious  everyone can tell even if he didn't admit it.  He treats his other daughter like a stranger and it breaks my heart.  She has privately cried to me about it .  Her father says that everyone has a favorite and he is not going to change anything.  I tell him how much it hurts his other daughter  but he will not change.  Most of his friends think that his relationship with his adopted daughter is a sick one. 

  She hates  me for the simple reason that I'm dating her father and she wants to be the only woman in his life.  She treats me like an outsider even though I've been dating her dad for 5 years. He tells me that she would not like anyone that was dating him.   I have a feeling that she will eventually be the reason we break up.

 

Help!!!

 
June 27, 2007, 10:10 pm CDT

I was a Jason

I had a mom like Jason's.  She drove me nuts and my life was hell when she got drunk.  This went on for MOST OF MY LIFE until I joined the Army.  I know why Jason is so angry - it is because he has to live with a drunk.  A stinking lousy loser drunk that blames everything on him.  A drunk who hides her stuff and lies and denies she drinks.  I also had to live with a drunk uncle and a drunk stepmother and a drunk stepfather.  My heart goes out to Jason.    I had to go through 2-1/2 years of therapy before my anger disappeared.  I would destroy anything of value that belonged to me.  I couldn't wear a watch or have a little radio or a bicycle or keep much money around because I would destroy it from totally unexplained fits of anger.  His mom is an idiot because she complains about his anger, but she is the one causing his anger. 
 
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